# 153
153. Perhaps It Was All For This Moment (6)
Vincent provided the answer to my question.
"When I was young, my personality was so rough that I received a lot of warnings from adults. I tried to be careful, but it wasn't easy, so Violet must have had a hard time too. Still, from some point on, I stopped using harsh words and behaved properly. But I guess it was difficult during that time, because when we met again, she had returned to her original self."
Vincent wore a puzzled expression, but for some reason, I felt like I knew the reason. It was partly because of her status, but Violet probably tried to be careful in her own way as Vincent's fiancée. So she must have suppressed her original personality and tried to appear pretty.
However, when her engagement to Vincent was broken and she became another man's wife, she no longer needed to look pretty for Vincent. Vincent would probably never know that reason forever.
"If it's comfortable for her, then that would be good."
I laughed hollowly in my heart as I looked at the clueless man before me with pity.
"Right, for what reason did you come by earlier? It seemed like you had business, was it because of Lord Ethan?"
"To monitor you."
Monitoring again.
"I already told you I wouldn't leave without saying anything."
"I know."
"Then why did you come to monitor me?"
"Because I'm anxious. Worried that you might say you're leaving."
I felt like I understood why he was saying such things. It was probably because of the incident with Alicia.
Only then did I notice his gaze examining me. Even though I looked no different from usual, I could feel his anxiety. So he was worried enough that it showed on the outside.
"I... promised, so I won't suddenly disappear."
"But you'll definitely have all sorts of thoughts running through your head, so I'm worried."
I did have many thoughts, but that didn't mean I intended to break my promise with him. It was something that would happen eventually anyway. Though I didn't know it would be like this.
"It's okay."
I showed him a light smile. In truth, we both knew well that it wasn't okay. Nevertheless, seeing Vincent so anxious made me want to say those words to him. Then I recalled Vincent telling me it would be okay when I was worried about the murder case a few days ago. Was he feeling the same way I did now?
Vincent said no more. He merely gazed at me steadily and nodded once. It felt like he was telling me he would trust me.
* * *
Violet stayed for two days and then left the mansion. She had asked to stay longer, but Vincent refused. Perhaps sensing that the incident, which he thought would be easily resolved, was growing bigger, he seemed worried about Violet staying in this mansion. He could move everyone to another mansion immediately, but he couldn't act rashly since he didn't know what might happen next.
So they compromised on two days. Violet expressed her dissatisfaction, but Vincent only said they would soon leave this mansion. He also conveyed that he planned to send Robert back this time. Whether because he didn't want her to worry, he didn't explain the detailed circumstances.
Violet spent her time practically glued to Robert. Robert was naturally delighted, and when Joely joined the mother and son, the atmosphere became bustling and noisy.
During her stay at the mansion, Violet demanded this and that from Vincent. Actually, rather than demands, they were closer to complaints. Change the pillow, the floor carpet isn't good, the curtain pattern is strange—when she pointed out even the most trivial details, Vincent's face, which had initially complied with her requests quietly, gradually grew tired. He was tormented like that for two days.
In truth, Violet didn't seem to care much as long as there was a bed to sleep in and meals to satisfy her hunger, but after venting her complaints to Vincent, she would always look relieved.
"I'm telling you, it's fun to see him flustered."
Seeing her like that, I wondered if she was relieving her hardships from the past five years in this way.
And she was indeed as busy as I had heard. Even during the short period of two days, she had individual conversations with the servant she brought along in between. Even though I briefly overheard, it was such unfamiliar talk that I couldn't understand what they were saying. She told Vincent she wanted to stay longer, but given her circumstances, it seemed unlikely she could stay for long.
When the promised two days passed, Violet wore an expression of great regret. After bidding farewell to Joely, she approached me and clasped her hands together.
"I wish we could have talked more."
Two days was too short a time for a proper conversation. At her words promising we would definitely meet again, I nodded in response. I didn't know when I'd be able to see busy her again, but still, unlike five years ago, this was a parting with a promise of next time, so we were able to separate happily.
Robert was also by Violet's side. After their conversation, Robert also decided to leave this place. Robert, apparently overjoyed at the thought of returning to his own home after a long time, kept smiling with excitement, but when departing, he burst into tears. There was even a flustered moment when he suddenly grabbed the hem of my dress and cried.
As we coaxed the crying Robert into the carriage, the nanny also bid me farewell. It wasn't a long time, but since we had spent most of our time together while staying here, we expressed our regrets and promised to meet again.
After the commotion, the carriage carrying them departed, and Joely called me aside. Having heard about how Alicia was dragged away and the fact that I had concealed my identity, Joely brought up the matter to me. For the past two days, with Violet present, she couldn't speak in detail and must have been waiting for the right moment to bring it up.
"I feel unnecessarily sorry. It seems like this happened because I thought poorly of it."
"Not at all."
Knowing what had happened between her and Vincent, I refuted her. In fact, Joely had helped; there was nothing for her to feel sorry about. Strictly speaking, I was the one at fault for deceiving her.
During this time, Ethan didn't press me. Even while with Violet, Ethan didn't mention Alicia's matter at all, and Vincent was the same. The servants who had tried to torment me also avoided me after learning what Alicia had done. Occasionally someone would cast curious glances, but no one felt inclined to gossip about it.
'I want to meet my sister.'
When I was alone with Vincent yesterday, I brought up the words I had been contemplating. Hearing my words, Vincent remained silent for a long time before reluctantly permitting it. I knew that silence was his conflict, hoping I wouldn't meet Alicia. But I had to meet her. Aside from what Ethan had said, I separately wanted to meet Alicia and talk with her again.
"I heard about it a few days ago. You must have had a hard time."
As I was walking down the corridor, Johnny spoke to me.
A hard time, hardly. I shook my head, then suddenly looked at Johnny. If he had heard about me, he must have also heard what happened afterward. Yet Johnny showed no reaction whatsoever. No surprise, no bewilderment, no defending Alicia by saying she would never do such a thing.
"Does it not bother you?"
"About what?"
"You must have heard about Alicia."
"I heard."
"I'm asking if you're fine after hearing that."
At my words, Johnny, who had been lost in thought for a moment, shrugged his shoulders. He didn't seem bothered at all. I wasn't expecting an overblown reaction since Johnny wasn't a party to the matter. But recalling how Johnny had acted until now...
"Normally, wouldn't you deny it, saying she couldn't have done that, or get angry saying it's wrong?"
Regardless of the right or wrong of the incident, if it was about someone you liked, wouldn't you have such thoughts at least once? I had naturally thought Johnny would take Alicia's side. But Johnny instead looked at me strangely as if I was the odd one.
"Wasn't it something Alicia did wrong?"
"That's true, but..."
"Receiving punishment for doing something wrong isn't strange, is it?"
It wasn't strange, but was that attitude really normal? I stared intently at Johnny. Then I reached one conclusion.
"You didn't actually like Alicia."
If he had liked Alicia, he couldn't have been so composed. Perhaps because I had received similar affection, it now became clear to me. The fact that Johnny didn't like Alicia. No, he might have had some feelings, but the depth of his affection wasn't deep. If it was someone he liked with all his heart, he couldn't have accepted the news so calmly upon hearing what happened to them. Let alone someone whose face you merely know—you'd naturally worry and be curious if something happened to them.
"I did like her. I said she was my ideal type."
"Then what's with that reaction?"
"What's wrong with my reaction?"
The conversation seemed to be going in circles without finding direction. I closed my mouth. Johnny tilted his head and looked at me curiously. He couldn't understand what I was saying at all. That was how little Johnny liked Alicia.
He had brought up Alicia, saying he liked her, and became depressed saying his feelings weren't reciprocated. Even though the distance between Alicia and Johnny had grown, his nonchalant attitude was utterly baffling.
"Never mind. Go your way."
"What? Why bring it up and then stop?"
"Because there's nothing more to say."
Any further conversation was meaningless. I felt unsettled, as if I had learned something unnecessary. I waved my hand dismissively, telling Johnny to go. Johnny still wore a bewildered expression, but perhaps realizing I had no intention of continuing the conversation, he changed the subject.
"Stop wandering around at night. You don't know if you might end up like that too."
What kind of curse was that suddenly? I scowled and glared, but Johnny just snickered and turned away.
Honestly, I was somewhat afraid to meet Alicia. Normally, regardless of what happened between Alicia and me, even when mentioning matters with the siblings who had left first, it wasn't like this. Hesitation emerged. Alicia's last appearance, shouting maliciously as she distanced herself, lingered in my mind and tormented me. I couldn't forget the face that had glared at me so fiercely.
When I arrived in front of the room where Alicia was being confined, two male servants were standing guard. Perhaps they had been informed in advance, they merely glanced at me without stopping me. I took a few breaths in front of the door before carefully opening it.
Through the creaking gap of the opening door, a room with not a single sign of presence came into view. Alicia was sitting on the bed placed in the corner. Even as I entered and closed the door, Alicia didn't cast her gaze this way even once.
Her once glossy hair was thoroughly disheveled, and her crumpled, dust-covered clothes still bore the traces of her struggling to avoid being dragged away. The moment I saw that appearance, it felt as if a heavy stone had dropped in my chest. I hesitated before parting my lips.
"Alicia."
At my call, Alicia's body seemed to flinch, but there was still no particular response. Unlike her usual liveliness, her calm and quiet appearance seemed unsettling instead. I took a step closer and called Alicia again.
"Alicia."
Still, no response came.
Through her wildly tangled hair, I caught a glimpse of Alicia's face. A face that looked exhausted and weary. Though only a few days had passed, the venom that had been in Alicia all that time had faded away.
"Alicia."
I called once more, but there was still no answer. I too fell silent and said no more.