Chapter 80. In the End, It Was Love
2023.11.19.
"Of course, as you said, I am busy, but I shall try to make time more often from now on. You are not just anyone; are you not my family?"
Herdin suppressed a bitter laugh at the word 'family' slipping from Ivan's lips.
Come to think of it, this family was peculiarly obsessed with the word 'family'. It seemed they viewed it as nothing more than a collar to slap on a disobedient dog.
That word was nauseating.
If it weren't for that damned 'family', his wife would not have had to endure what she was going through now.
It was laughable how they, the very ones who had plunged Blair into a pit of guilt simply under the guise of 'family', now clung to her, desperately spouting the word 'family' to hold her back.
Ivan, oblivious to his inner thoughts, set down his teacup and asked.
"Do you enjoy chess?"
"Now that I think about it, I haven't played since I was a child."
"Then you should show off your skills for the first time in a while."
Despite Herdin's reluctant reply, Ivan insisted on calling an attendant to prepare a chessboard.
The thrill of the game lay in the tension of facing an opponent of equal skill and the precarious victory snatched at the very end.
However, ever since Kasion's death, Herdin had lost interest in chess, having no worthy opponent to face.
"You may start first."
For Ivan, who had lived his life as a crown prince and now an emperor, defeat in a game was exceedingly rare—something one could count on one hand.
Beating such a man would only fuel his competitive spirit, so Herdin intended to lose appropriately.
Once Ivan deemed him no true rival, he would likely never suggest playing such a trifling game again.
The game flowed exactly as Herdin intended.
As a gap widened at a moderate pace, giving Ivan a comfortable lead, the main topic finally surfaced.
"Have you heard the rumors circulating lately?"
"That my wife was kidnapped, that the mastermind behind it is Her Majesty the Empress Dowager, and that the reason stems from the incident ten years ago... Are you referring to that rumor?"
"Yes. Those rumors have been giving me quite the headache lately."
Ivan picked up a chess piece, pondering where to place it as he continued.
"Even if it is a baseless rumor, I cannot simply stand by and watch the authority of the imperial family be undermined."
Finding a suitable spot, he set the piece down and commanded in an impassive voice.
"You are to issue a clarification."
"What sort of clarification do you mean?"
"A clarification stating that Blair's kidnapping had nothing to do with my mother."
Herdin scoffed at Ivan's words.
"...It seems you have no interest in whether my wife was actually kidnapped, or who the mastermind truly is."
If he were a proper older brother—if he possessed even an ounce of sibling affection—wouldn't his first concern be for his kidnapped sister?
Yet he acted as though the safety of the imperial family and his own dignity were all that mattered.
Even though he had expected as much, the reality of it ignited a fresh wave of anger within him.
"That child is now your wife, so I trust you will handle that matter as you see fit."
Unfazed by the accusation, Ivan answered composedly, and then pushed a step further.
"It would be best if you also made your stance clear regarding the incident from ten years ago while you're at it. Now that we are family, isn't it laughable that it is still being brought up?"
"..."
"If you issue a clarification, there will be no more cause for headaches over such absurd rumors, no?"
Herdin's lips twisted at Ivan's words. It seemed the incident from ten years ago was nothing more than a joke to him.
His plan to take a deliberate loss changed.
"I believe proof will be necessary, rather than a mere clarification."
Retorting thus, Herdin moved his chess piece. Without a sliver of hesitation, his piece precisely targeted Ivan's knight.
The very knight that had been galloping across the board, capturing Herdin's pieces just moments ago.
Ivan faltered at the sudden strike.
He had only missed a single move, yet a sense of crisis washed over him, as if the entire tide of the game had suddenly reversed.
"Because everything in those rumors is true."
Across the silent chessboard, their eyes met.
Observing Ivan's stiffened expression, Herdin nonchalantly continued.
"Of course, I understand that Your Majesty may have truly been unaware. As a son, it is only natural to find it difficult to suspect the Empress Dowager."
"..."
"I will soon present evidence that will convince even Your Majesty, so I pray that you will deliver a just judgment this time as well."
Just then, the faint sound of a bell striking the hour echoed from afar.
It seemed the conversation could end here.
"It appears Your Majesty has won the game. I have other matters to attend to, so may I request your leave?"
Herdin expected Ivan to let him go without a fuss.
However, contrary to his expectations, Ivan relaxed his rigid expression and brought up another matter.
"If your claims are true, then as my mother's son, I owe you an apology. I will naturally pass a judgment commensurate with the crime. First..."
He tapped the chessboard with his fingers, then halted his movement as if a fitting judgment had come to mind.
"It would be best for you to divorce Blair first."
At his unexpected words, a subtle crack appeared in Herdin's theretofore indifferent eyes.
"It was a union born of my own greed to begin with. If your claims are true, the imperial family is essentially Delmark's enemy, and in that case, I cannot let this marriage stand."
"..."
"Would it not displease the late Empress, resting in the afterlife, to see her beloved niece marry the daughter of the enemy?"
Ivan spoke as though out of consideration, but his eyes, watching Herdin's reaction, gleamed coldly.
"Public opinion within Delmark will be poor regardless, and it weighs on my mind to leave that child in a place full of people who resent her."
"..."
"There is no child between you two yet, so it can be resolved cleanly without any lingering issues."
Herdin scoffed.
It was a laughable thing for Ivan to say. If he were truly so concerned about the public opinion regarding Blair, he should never have proposed this marriage in the first place.
Therefore, the reason Ivan was bringing this up now was...
"We can discuss my mother's punishment after I see this reliable evidence you spoke of."
Herdin could see right through it—it was a threat.
In essence, it meant: if he didn't want to divorce Blair, he needed to drop this matter.
"You may leave now."
Herdin rose from his seat and turned away.
A breeze, caught between late spring and early summer and carrying the scent of flowers, brushed past him. As his fevered mind cooled, rational thought began to return.
Thinking rationally, Ivan was right.
If Esmeralda's false charges were cleared, Blair would unmistakably become the daughter of the enemy.
If Ivan were to demand a divorce with Blair to atone for Katrina's crimes, there would no longer be any justification to maintain this marriage.
'Was that not what I wanted?'
It had been a foregone conclusion from the moment he accepted this absurd marriage contract. It was merely happening sooner than anticipated.
Uncovering the truth behind the incident from ten years ago had been his long-cherished desire. It was not something to be swayed by a contract marriage that would end in a mere year.
So why was he hesitating?
'Why, exactly?'
What did that woman mean to him?
Herdin roughly loosened the cravat that felt like it was strangling him.
The unanswered question continued to linger on his lips.
* * *
The sky, which had been growing overcast since sunset, began to pour down heavy rain as the sun dipped below the horizon.
"Wow, it's raining so hard suddenly. I suppose we can call this a summer rain now."
Lina, who had been brushing Blair's hair at the vanity, remarked as she looked out the window. Watching the raindrops strike the glass, Blair nodded in agreement.
"It seems so."
"But my lady, did something upset you today?"
"...Do I look upset?"
Blair stared at her reflection in the mirror. Her expression was no different than usual.
"...There shouldn't be."
Today was the day she had been so desperately waiting for.
"Hmm, maybe it's the rain?"
"Perhaps."
Seeing Blair smile as she said it, Lina asked no more.
Having finished brushing her hair, Lina offered a goodnight—'Sweet dreams'—and exited the bedroom. Through the closing door, the chime of the grandfather clock striking ten echoed.
Herdin had not yet returned. It seemed he would be late again today, just as in her past life.
Blair crouched by the door, straining her ears toward the hallway. Then, she gently stroked her still-flat stomach.
Soon, she would be able to see Asiel again.
Of course, she would have to wait ten more months, but simply confirming that the child was safely growing inside her would bring her peace of mind.
The thought of seeing her child again soon made her forget all the hardships she had endured.
The fact that she had been abandoned by Katrina, the guilt over the incident from ten years ago—all of it faded away.
Yet, why wasn't she purely happy?
She found the answer to her own incomprehensible doubt the moment she heard footsteps approaching beyond the door.
Realizing it was Herdin's footsteps, her heart began to race.
Only then did she realize.
That tonight would be her last night with him.
That once this night passed, she would have to bury these emotions that constricted her heart.
Listening to the rain paining the window for a fleeting moment, Blair finally opened the door and stood before him.
"...Herdin."
Walking at a slower pace than usual, Herdin spotted her and came to a halt.
A bitter laugh escaped his clenched teeth as he was forced to confront the answer to the question he had desperately tried to ignore.
Now he finally understood why he could not let her go.
In the end, it was love.