Chapter 150. A Relationship That Means Nothing
2024.01.28.
People don't die easily.
Especially those born with strong constitutions.
Herdin looked at his wrist with indifferent eyes, as if observing someone else's wound. It was the place where he had hurt himself a few nights ago while drunk. The deeply torn wound had disappeared without a trace.
That night, after Herdin returned to the capital, Mason, who had been monitoring his condition, came to check on him while he slept and discovered him.
Thanks to the quick discovery, there was no threat to his life. The wound, too, left no scar thanks to calling a priest for treatment. At that, Herdin mocked himself.
The wound you received won't even heal.
Whenever he saw his clean wrist, the urge to tear it open again would surge up abruptly. As frequently as he naturally thought of Blair.
"You said you were going to meet Sir Felick today, right?"
Ruth, who had finished organizing today's documents, asked Herdin. Herdin answered by standing up from his seat.
Ruth watched Herdin's back with anxious eyes as he put on his coat.
It was rare for him to hurt himself to suppress his mana, but it did happen occasionally.
However, Ruth and Mason noticed that the wound was not simply a wound made to suppress his emotions.
Fearing that Herdin might have wayward thoughts again, the two contacted Johan, who could at least be called a friend.
With the request, "His Excellency seems to be struggling greatly, could you meet him and listen to him?"
They didn't mention the commotion from a few days ago. No matter how close a friend, in the end, he was an outsider and a noble. Herdin's weakness would become Delmark's weakness.
'Of course, with that personality, even if they're friends, he wouldn't open up about his feelings.'
Still, Johan, who had much experience in romance and had endured the pain of parting many times, might be of help.
Ruth thought so as he saw Herdin off.
"Have a safe trip."
* * *
Ruth had certainly arranged for Herdin to meet Johan with that intention, but Johan couldn't even mention his own experience.
'...If I make one wrong move, I'll die.'
Let alone talk about Blair, whenever Johan tried to bring up his romantic experience to open the conversation, Herdin would radiate a chilling aura.
Though he said nothing special, the quiet gaze that met his eyes alone was enough to overwhelm the surrounding atmosphere.
In the end, Johan couldn't bring up any story this time either and wore an awkward smile.
"Um, shall we play one more game?"
Just as the two picked up their billiard cues again, men's voices came from beyond the archway. They were familiar voices.
"So, is it my turn now?"
"What turn?"
"I mean our Princess. I'm thinking of going and trying to seduce her."
"Ha. Do you even know where she lives?"
"I'll find that out starting now."
"Crazy bastard. Even if she's pretty, you'd marry a woman with a child? And a child whose father is unknown at that."
It was the group of noble young lords who had made vulgar remarks about Blair before Herdin and Blair married.
"Ah, that is a bit of a shame."
"Then what are you going to do?"
"Just sometimes when we're bored and lonely, we could be a relationship that eases each other's loneliness. Right?"
Someone who had been silently listening to the conversation interjected with a cautious voice.
"Hey, hey. Lower your voice. They'll hear in the next room."
Johan glanced at Herdin's mood and hoped they would shut up over there, but unfortunately, that crazy bastard obsessed with Blair didn't seem to have any such intention.
"Next room? Ah, Herdin Delmark? So what if he hears? He's not her husband anymore anyway. What authority does he have to say anything?"
As soon as the noble young lord finished speaking, Herdin put down his billiard cue.
Before Johan, who had turned pale predicting what would happen shortly, could stop him, Herdin stepped out of the room.
The noble young lord, who was rambling on about specific plans on how to find Blair and how to hit on her when they met, flinched when he saw Herdin approach and stand before him. However, that was only a fleeting moment.
As if trying to hide the fact that he had been momentarily overwhelmed by Herdin's imposing presence, he came on even stronger.
"What. So what. Going to break a chair again this time?"
"No. You're the one running your mouth, why would I break a chair."
Herdin kicked the chair the young lord was sitting in as soon as he finished speaking. Along with the helplessly falling chair, the young lord tumbled over in a ridiculous posture.
"Ha, fuck... Have you lost your mind, Your Grace the Duke?"
From the enraged young lord's mouth, the attitude he had toward Herdin from childhood burst out unchanged.
The other noble young lords stopped with horrified faces the young lord who was getting up to confront Herdin. And Johan also grabbed Herdin's arm.
"Herdin, calm down first..."
However, before Johan could even calm Herdin down, the young lord provoked him.
"You must still love your divorced wife?"
At that, a crack suddenly appeared in Herdin's cold eyes. Seeing that, the young lord clapped his hands with an exaggerated expression as if he finally understood.
"Ah, you got dumped?"
With that single word, the atmosphere froze.
Only one person, the very one who had said it, giggled as if it was amusing.
"Wow, even the great Duke got dumped."
"……"
"But why are you taking it out on someone else? What authority do you have?"
"……"
"Your wife and you are strangers now."
"……"
"You two are now a relationship that means nothing."
Herdin's eyes, which had been quiet until now, violently wavered at that single word. The young lord didn't miss that opening and drove in.
"Whatever I say about your 'ex' wife, whether I roll around with her or not, it's none of your busi—"
However, before the young lord could finish speaking, Herdin's fist, having shaken off Johan, flew and planted itself in his face.
* * *
The brawl that broke out at the club was barely calmed down only after Ruth and Kaligo arrived upon hearing the news. By then, the opposing young lord had been unilaterally beaten by Herdin into a bloody mess.
Johan belatedly realized the scrape on the back of his hand from falling while trying to stop Herdin and frowned.
Ruth apologized on his behalf.
"I'm sorry..."
"Forget it. Thinking of that guy's temper, it's a relief it ended at this point."
Johan, who remembered from childhood when Herdin fought the young lords who brought up his parents until they were bloody messes before going to war, finally breathed a sigh of relief.
"You can go now."
"Yes. Take care."
Soon after, the carriage departed.
Ruth quietly observed Herdin's mood.
He was looking at the scenery outside the window as if he hadn't just gone crazy and fought. Except for his disheveled hair and clothing, he had a calm face that didn't look like someone who had just been in a fight.
Ruth, who had been opening and closing his lips for a moment, carefully spoke.
"You'll be okay. It'll be hard for a while, but."
As if knowing it was a presumptuous thing to say, Ruth kept his mouth shut after those words.
Herdin chewed on those words a beat late.
I'll be okay?
When exactly?
As he repeatedly asked himself that question to which no one knew the answer, the scenery of the clock tower passed by outside the window.
Herdin let out a hollow laugh upon discovering it.
The clock tower is visible wherever you go in the capital. As if no matter what method you use, you can't escape from it.
Herdin, who had been snickering for a while, soon completely wiped the smile off his face and opened his mouth.
"Stop the carriage."
His eyes giving the command held a clear light, unlike before.
"Y-Your Grace? Where are you going?"
Leaving behind Ruth, who was looking at him with bewildered eyes, Herdin got off the carriage and came to a nearby post house.
He handed over the watch he was wearing on his wrist as payment and borrowed a horse to mount. Then he immediately pulled the reins.
A relationship that means nothing now.
He couldn't refute those words. Because they were right.
But, the moment he heard those words, he realized.
That we could never be a relationship that means nothing.
I could never be nothing to you.
He couldn't accept that fact.
Probably forever.
* * *
"Haa."
Blair, who had come up to the second floor, sat on the bed and caught her breath.
Perhaps because there were less than two months left until the birth, her belly had grown noticeably more during the past month or so. Now even climbing the stairs left her short of breath.
'I should move my room to the first floor now.'
She had chosen the second floor due to security concerns and the view, but it seemed she would have to move rooms soon.
Having caught her breath, Blair opened the box she had placed by the window.
Inside the box were cute sky-blue baby socks. They had been bought by Lina and Melly, who had gone to the market during the day.
'There's still some time before the baby is born.'
'We're giving it to you in advance!'
She wondered how the two knew the child in her belly was a boy and chose sky-blue socks, but she let it pass thinking it could be a coincidence.
She also thought the socks seemed to be made of quite expensive material, but she let that pass without minding as well.
What mattered was that their gift was very cute.
"Everyone is waiting for you like this, baby."
As she whispered to the child and fiddled with the socks, something fell out from inside the socks. It was a memo pad guaranteeing the quality.
On the memo pad was written the name of a familiar boutique.
'This is...'
It was the name of the boutique in the capital where she had gone several times to buy Ashiel's clothes in her past life. Seeing that, a question crossed Blair's mind.
'Lina and Melly said they bought them at the market.'
Wondering about that, she set the box back down by the window. At that moment, something faint brushed past beyond the window.
"...Snow?"
She had thought the weather had been cloudy since the afternoon, and very tiny sleet was falling.
It was the first snow of the year.
As she was blankly staring at that scenery, a familiar silhouette appeared in the landscape outside the window.
Herdin had come along with the snow.