14.
When I first experienced this, I must have believed—naively so.
That effort would always be followed by results.
I knew misfortune, but not malice.
I ran through back alleys all night, chased unlicensed mages, bickered with criminals one by one, pounded the pavement to find witnesses, gathered testimonies…….
At times, I willingly embraced humiliation, bowing my head before others to beg for help.
I devoted my entire life to proving my innocence.
But what I gained for it was bottomless despair and a life of resignation.
The one thing I realized in exchange for that bitter failure was this:
That I could never catch the culprit by repeating the old ways.
He was someone I hadn't even managed to step on the tail of after chasing for years; so what method could I possibly use to catch him this time?
The clue was already in my hands.
Having slipped away once during the Rohwinaseu incident, he must have started this confident he could do so again.
But unlike then, the situation was no longer unconditionally turning in the "culprit's" favor.
Because I had caught on.
Moreover, the parties themselves had learned that they had fallen victim to the love potion.
Now there was no one left to move as he had expected.
Yet letting the culprit know of this seemed unwise.
There was also a petty part of me that wanted him to personally experience how infuriating, shameful, and disgusting it is to be deceived.
But more than that, the moment he looked down on me endlessly and let his guard down would be my opportunity.
By now, the culprit probably…….
But calling him "culprit" any longer didn't sit well with me.
I suppose I wanted to attach a word closer to a term of contempt to that man.
But I didn't know his age, gender, or status at all.
After a moment's thought, I decided to call this damned human a "pervert" from now on.
It was extremely unlikely that someone with such foul tastes had a properly functioning mind.
Tying together two men and women who had been living perfectly well at his whim, waiting for them to break down, tirelessly entangling them with yet another partner while never revealing himself—if that isn't a pervert, what is?
That made him a pervert of the highest order.
Anyway, by now the pervert would be gauging how things were unfolding.
Waiting to see if the men who took the love potion had properly begun their activities, and what kind of embarrassing reactions I'd show that suited his tastes…….
A vein bulged on my forehead involuntarily.
Just what does this pervert take me for?
People possess something called the ability to learn.
No matter how miserably I'd been holed up at home lately, that doesn't mean I'd fall for it completely and shamelessly just because someone says they like me.
Does he think I'd walk into my own demise of my own accord again?
The love potion was an ancient forbidden technique widely disputed even in academic circles.
The last time, it had ended with a tremendous mountain of debt and being socially ruined, but this time I might lose my head.
Of course, this was a future that would only be realized if the truth was exposed and revealed to the world…….
"…Huh?"
A shiver ran down my spine.
Thinking back, the timing of Rohwinaseu's exposure for having taken the love potion was uncanny.
No way.
No way?
Was that the pervert's doing too?
When news of my engagement to Rohwinaseu spread, and our marriage was finally settled.
Did he personally detonate the bomb?
Was he afraid I'd safely marry Rohwinaseu and rise in status?
Afraid I'd live happily, swaggering about against his wishes?
True, if he wasn't going to expose it, there'd be no reason to secretly feed someone the potion.
It was staggering.
But then, to my surprise, his next plan was vividly drawn before my eyes.
Then wouldn't he move in the same way this time?
The moment I smiled with genuine relief, brimming with happiness, wouldn't he pour the cold water of misfortune upon me?
I had a gut feeling that he would absolutely never be the first to reveal that they had taken the love potion before then.
If so, that meant I could afford to lie low and investigate his identity from behind the scenes.
My mind, which had been nothing but disorganized urgency, soon settled into calm.
The pervert…….
Why do I hate him like this?
That one could hate another person so intensely was not easily understood.
Even as I burned with rage, a faint sorrow brushed across my chest.
A pervert is a pervert, in any case.
I decided to entertain no further thoughts.
Then, for now.
It seemed I would have to maintain for as long as possible the state of "acting as though I'd fall completely and shamelessly for anyone who said they liked me…… yet not having actually fallen for it."
So, only on the surface.
So…….
With three men, at that.
Why had the pervert fed the potion to those three of all people?
……Because he's a pervert?
In calling the pervert a pervert, I had created a problem where the answer to every question converged on "pervert."
Or perhaps he had prepared plenty of people in advance on the chance I wouldn't fall for it.
"……."
In the end, there was no more plausible answer than that he had truly done it because he was a pervert.
* * *
As I stepped into the tent, a tutting sound greeted me as if he had been waiting.
I hadn't even said anything yet?
The old man must have had no difficulty discerning the truth from the mere way I entered.
When I turned, he asked, as if he had been waiting.
"Were all three of them, by any chance?"
I hadn't known I was such an easy person to read.
At his question, I rather unnecessarily rubbed my cheek and shrugged.
"……Well."
"You must give a clear answer."
He had already noticed, yet the malice in his insistence on hearing it from my own mouth was nasty.
When I glanced at him, his eyes were sparkling, awaiting my answer.
I couldn't see what was so delightful about being the sole keeper of such a ridiculous piece of gossip, but…….
"Yes, all three had taken the love potion."
As I pushed aside a pile of books and barely seated myself on the sofa, the old man's gaze never left me.
"Your face has become quite haggard these past few days."
"Wouldn't it be stranger if I looked happy?"
The old man laughed briefly, as if in apparent assent.
"That is the nature of truth. Truth that makes no distinction between friend and foe can sometimes act with terrible cruelty."
Uncharacteristic of one who had so long pursued secrets and truth, there was something chilling in his eyes as he spoke of it.
I humored him halfheartedly.
"Well, the truth that one might have been happier not knowing, and all that?"
"If the Baron were in their position, what choice would you make?"
I shook my head firmly.
"There's nothing to choose. What meaning is there in happiness that isn't truly mine? I'd rather be unhappy knowing the truth."
As if he had expected as much, the old man pushed up his glasses and averted his gaze.
"I trust you have informed them of the truth as well, of course."
"……."
Isn't that a given?
I, who had never once agonized over such a matter, faltered.
Why would I agonize over that?
Am I to watch them again, not knowing the love they feel is because of the potion, foolishly clinging on, only to waste part of their lives in vain and regret it afterward?
I was done with such things.
“If you know and say nothing, isn’t that the same as deceiving someone?”
“I would not dare interfere with that choice. It’s just……”
“……”
“Are you truly so coldhearted as to hold fast to that choice until the very end, Baron?”
For an instant, the elder’s gaze fixed sharply on me, as if judging what sort of person I was.
Looking into those clear blue eyes, I suddenly felt a sense of déjà vu.
An intuition that the elder, too, had once been the same kind of human as me.
“……So, what do you intend to do from now on?”
I thought of the pervert, but did not say it aloud.
I merely answered in an indifferent tone.
“I’m thinking of gathering ingredients for the antidote for a while.”
“It seems you feel responsible for them.”
Logically speaking, I wasn’t the one who had made them drink the elixir, so I had no obligation to take responsibility for them.
But just as the elder said, I couldn’t completely ignore it either.
After all, the pervert’s target from the very beginning hadn’t been them, but me.
“More importantly, are you not going to search for the culprit?”
“I’ll look, but it’d be better not to expect much.”
At my calm tone, the elder soon made a proposal.
“Then how about I provide you with information on the antidote’s ingredients, Baron?”
“And what do you want from me in return?”
“Simply tell me stories whenever you come here like this.”
“……Stories?”
“Nothing particularly important. Idle chatter like this should be enough.”
An offer without clear conditions attached was, in itself, no different from a dangerous bomb.
Sensing what I was wary of, the elder added a stipulation.
“Whatever the story may be, if you wish, you may refuse as much as you like, and I will not ask any further either.”
If it was put that way.
I accepted without much deliberation.
Some of the antidote’s ingredients were so rare that many had not appeared on the market for over a decade.
So much so that even prominent noble houses had no guarantee of obtaining them.
Of course, there was also the basic method of using information brokers……
“I look forward to working with you.”
“Likewise.”
I clasped the elder’s outstretched hand.
After the handshake ended, I continued holding the elder’s hand as it was about to withdraw and asked.
“So I’d like to hear today’s information now.”
“……”
“Has the ‘Heart of Merinis’ appeared on the market recently?”
The elder had just raised one corner of the mouth with a slightly dumbfounded expression and was about to speak.
“I……”
A faint shadow fell outside the tent, and an unfamiliar man’s voice slipped in between us.
“Margaret. The third young master is looking for you.”
I reflexively looked at the elder.
Margaret was the elder’s name.
The third young master?
The very third son of the ducal family I knew?
Margaret answered with an expression that said it was unwelcome, but not particularly surprising.
“I have a guest right now, so I believe that would be difficult.”
The man hesitated for a moment, as if troubled, choosing his words.
“Um, the Count has come here in person.”
My posture, which had been sprawled out carelessly, straightened on its own.
While the elder watched with interest as my expression twisted in real time, the man continued speaking.
“If it is not urgent, would it not be better to send your guest away for now?”
The elder turned to look at me, and I nodded.
“Then tell him to come now.”
I was just about to lift my backside, ready to bolt at any moment, when the elder asked.
“Are you trying to run away?”
“……”
“Do you have something to feel guilty about?”
I sat back down at once.
And immediately regretted it.
The elder’s eyes were gleaming.
I realized far too late that this was not the sort of person who would miss the chance to witness Rohwinas and me encountering each other up close.
But after hearing a provocation like that, how could I scurry away with my tail between my legs?
This was purely a matter of pride.
My unusually sharp ears caught the sound of footsteps drawing closer.
And the shadow of a single person, its presence growing larger by the moment.
Damn it.
I squeezed my eyes shut.