8. The End of Summer
Episode 46
Dr. Breeman watched Ezekiel stride in with long, confident steps and was inwardly impressed. He had felt this the last time as well, but judging only by the way the man walked so unhesitatingly without even carrying a blind man’s cane, one would never think him blind. He even pulled out the drawing room settee and sat down naturally, without anyone’s help.
He had heard that the man had suffered terribly from withdrawal, but the face of the man who had overcome that arduous process looked far better than before. The peculiar pallor of an opium addict had vanished, and his pupils had returned to normal. His physique, too, had grown more solid. At a glance, it was clear he had eaten well, rested well, and recuperated well.
Above all, the air about him had changed. Back then, his nerves had been so sharply honed that the moment the examination ended, he seized on a pretext and vented his temper. Now, he was far more at ease and comfortable. The relaxed set of his mouth and the corners of his eyes made him seem like an entirely different person from before. Dr. Breeman guessed the reason was the influence of the maid who had come in with him.
The two entered with an ambiguous distance between them. Somehow, it looked as though they had been in much closer contact somewhere out of sight, only for the maid to deliberately put some space between them upon becoming conscious of Dr. Breeman’s gaze.
Certainly, the maid seemed intent on fulfilling the duties of her position with a composed attitude from where she ought to stand, but the man was full of personal feelings. It was evident from the way he loosely leaned his body in the direction where she stood and tried to keep track of her every move. As if displeased by the distance lying between them, he attempted several times to bring her closer, but each attempt ended in failure.
“The doctor is right in front of us. You can’t.”
Dr. Breeman heard the maid’s small, reproving voice.
Was her name Rose?
She had sent several letters on Ezekiel’s behalf, informing him of the man’s condition. The contents were one thing, but the graceful flow of the handwriting at the beginning of her signature had been striking. So much so that as soon as he received the letters, he found himself unconsciously trying to recall what she had looked like.
Judging by her face alone, she did not look old by any means, but he remembered that her bearing had been calm compared to her appearance. Strangely, whether her movements were large or small, there was nothing bustling about her. Perhaps her uncommon, low-pitched voice was what made her composure stand out all the more.
“It has been a long time.”
Dr. Breeman greeted him politely.
“I have been continuously informed of your condition by Miss Rose. She wrote about your recovery period in such detail that there was hardly anything more for me to confirm.”
At Dr. Breeman’s praise, Ezekiel tilted his head back. The angle of his slanting lips was exquisite.
“Rose is meticulous.”
“You have a very clever employee. I was surprised by how beautiful the handwriting in her letters was.”
It was praise he had offered without thinking. Rose had surprised Dr. Breeman several times by now. Once, when Ezekiel grew furious after the examination and she calmly soothed him; twice, when she chased after the departing doctor, suspected the abnormal symptoms were due to opium, and discussed countermeasures in detail; three times, when she managed, in the end, to bring Ezekiel through withdrawal; and four times, in the letters she had written with orderly handwriting and elegant sentences.
It was what had led him to suspect that she was not a maid with an ordinary background.
And the young man before him, too, did not carelessly let even the smallest clue slip by when the topic concerned his maid.
“Rose writes well too?”
“Yes, very well. Admirably so.”
“Well, Rose does have many talents.”
“I agree. And I imagine anyone who has seen Miss Rose in person would think the same, not only me.”
“Is that so.”
At Dr. Breeman’s affirmation, the man’s handsome brows narrowed.
“I nearly forgot. Yes, a jewel is a jewel to everyone. There’s no reason a beautiful person would be beautiful only to me.”
A complicated yet clinging emotion seeped into Ezekiel’s voice. For instance, the regret that he, her lover, who ought to see and feel the most about her, in truth knew the least compared to others; along with jealousy toward other men who naturally noticed the maid’s merits first; and, therefore, anticipation for the treatment that was about to begin.
Even a renowned officer who carried the title of “that major of the 37th Regiment” almost like a proper noun was no different from any other man before his lover. It was the first moment Ezekiel Valdemaera looked like an ordinary young man his age who had fallen in love.
A man who had once lived without the slightest room in either body or mind, inside or out, had made remarkable progress over the turn of a season. It was proof that both his body and mind had become sufficiently healthy.
“It seems you have been well all this time. I am glad.”
At Dr. Breeman’s congratulations, Ezekiel gave the credit to Rose.
“It’s thanks to Rose. I doubt there have been many times in my entire life when my body and mind have felt this peaceful.”
Ezekiel was only a young man who had lived, at most, a little over twenty-two or twenty-three years, hardly enough to bring up the word “entire life.” Yet even in the eyes of Dr. Breeman, who had lived more than twice as long as he had, Ezekiel’s short life had been full of twists and turns.
There are sometimes people like that in the world.
People who draw the attention of others from a very young age. People who easily become the subject of public rumor, and who, even when doing the same thing as everyone else, are somehow bound to stand out through an innate presence.
People who pass through the major events of life, things others take over a decade to experience or never experience at all, at an exceptionally rapid pace.
Ezekiel belonged to precisely that sort.
He had enlisted in the army in his mid-to-late teens, and when war broke out, he distinguished himself while serving as an officer of the 37th Regiment, which had caused a stir throughout Astrie. Then, he incurred the envy of jealous siblings and became entangled in their schemes.
Though it was only the life of a young man in his early twenties, the light and shadow that divided his life were stark. It was rare for anyone to experience such upheavals at so young an age, and in such a short period of time at that.
He was a man whose body must have been weary on the battlefield, and whose heart must have been weary upon his return. There had been no margin in his time or his emotions. In fact, on the day Dr. Breeman first met him, the feelings Ezekiel displayed most strongly were anger and despair. The compulsion and anxiety that he must not remain in this state as he was had been transmitted intact even to Dr. Breeman sitting across from him.
But if he had changed his way of thinking and resolved to accept his isolation in this mansion as rest, then the person who had contributed most greatly to that decision was undoubtedly this maid.
A woman who had brought emotional stability and comfort to Ezekiel, whose lofty pride had been wounded because he could not possibly accept the reality of having acquired a disability and fallen overnight.
The man, who had cast off extreme pessimism and found peace for the first time in a long while, now exuded an atmosphere that made it easy to understand why he had reigned as the knightly gentleman called “Major Valdemaera of the 37th Regiment,” setting women’s hearts aflutter.
“I will be waiting outside, so please call me if you need anything.”
Rose, who had been standing one step back, quietly retreated.
“Where are you going?”
It happened in an instant. Ezekiel stretched out his arm and snatched her.
Dr. Breeman looked at Rose, a little startled. She stood there awkwardly, caught, with a somewhat troubled expression before opening her mouth.
“I’ll be in the way.”
“Who said such nonsense? Did you have some strange dream?”
“……”
“You’ve been here all this time just fine, so what’s this now? How could your presence be a hindrance? If anything, without you, I won’t feel at ease, and that would be the hindrance.”
Ezekiel cut her off flatly. Dr. Breeman agreed as well.
On the day he had first visited the mansion, Rose had stayed by Ezekiel’s side the entire time, holding his hand and encouraging him, helping the examination end safely. Moreover, in the present situation where it was difficult to use painkillers, Rose was a sedative that would be more effective than most medicines. Dr. Breeman, too, would feel more reassured if she stayed with them.
“That is correct. It would be good for Miss Rose to be here. The patient’s stability comes first, after all.”
“And only when you are here do I have a purpose. You know that, Rose. Who I must see first when I open my eyes. You must not leave my side.”
At the two men’s attempts to dissuade her, Rose hesitated for a moment. The light was limited, so he could not be certain, but Dr. Breeman somehow thought Rose’s complexion looked pale. In the past, no matter how one looked at him, Ezekiel had been the one who appeared sickly, but now Rose looked more ill than Ezekiel, the actual patient.
“Miss Rose, are you feeling unwell anywhere?”
“No, no. I’m not. I’m perfectly fine. I’ll stay here.”
Rose quickly denied it with a shake of her head, then immediately composed herself and stood close beside Ezekiel.
“Rose, are you unwell again?”
Ezekiel fumbled for her with his unfocused gaze.
“Of course not. I’m just a little nervous.”
“I’m the one receiving treatment, so why are you nervous?”
“……I wonder.”
Rose answered with a faint laugh mixed in like a sigh.
“I told you. I only fight battles I can win. Trust me and don’t worry.”
Dr. Breeman read the wave of complicated emotion that briefly passed over her face. The master of this mansion was so focused solely on his lover right up until the moment before treatment that even someone unaware of the circumstances might immediately recognize the nature of their relationship, yet it was Rose, rather, who seemed utterly terrified, and that was strange.
She is probably worrying in his place over the things he does not worry about. She seemed to be cautious by nature.
Pushing aside his question, Dr. Breeman picked up the lamp. Ezekiel calmly faced the light.