[Episode 135] - A Stroll
“...I’ll allow you to go as far as the garden.”
“What...?”
At Titania’s declaration that she still would not let me leave this annex, I couldn’t help but make an incredulous face. Weren’t we supposed to have made up? Clutching my throbbing head, I asked Titania,
“...Why? Why do you keep trying to confine me here?”
“There are two reasons.”
Titania answered, holding up two fingers.
“First, Mother currently holds no position whatsoever. Perhaps you’re mistaken because the maids call you Her Majesty the Queen, but you were the one who gave up that title and left, weren’t you?”
Now that she mentioned it, that was true. That had been the ‘promise’ from the beginning, after all. Still, didn’t I at least retain the noble status of House Ririensol? Just as I was about to ask, Titania answered first, as if she had anticipated my question.
“If you’re thinking about your birth family, give it up. House Ririensol has disowned you.”
“......Why?”
“Who knows? I don’t know the details, but you never had a good relationship with that family to begin with, did you? You gave up your position as queen without permission and wouldn’t even return to the family home, so perhaps they saw it as the perfect opportunity to cut you off.”
“So... right now, I’m...”
“You’re a commoner, not a noble. You can’t even use the surname Ririensol anymore. Your name is no longer Vivian Ririensol. It’s simply Vivian.”
All I could do was let out a hollow laugh in disbelief. Come to think of it, I hadn’t received a single word from that family until now. They had been so completely silent that I had simply forgotten about them and stopped caring.
I had never intended to cling to a family that had not shown me its face even once. But even so, I had never imagined that they would be the ones to disown Vivian first.
‘So now that she’s no longer queen, Vivian is useless to the family? Poor Vivian.’
What kind of treatment had Vivian received from her family? Perhaps her twisted personality had been caused by her birth family. As I smiled bitterly, Titania folded down her first finger and continued.
“In other words, it’s to protect Mother safely here, since you have neither a position nor anyone backing you. But Mother didn’t appreciate my consideration and even tried to escape this place by crawling through a dog hole.”
“Ugh...”
Under Titania’s cold, accusing gaze, I couldn’t bring myself to raise my head. Watching me, Titania gave a small snort of laughter, then folded down her second finger and continued.
“The second reason is so I can keep Mother within my sight. To be honest, I still can’t trust you. I’m afraid that if I take my eyes off you, you’ll run away again.”
“...Your trust in me is at rock bottom, isn’t it?”
“You know who’s responsible for that, don’t you?”
I put on a wounded expression, but Titania answered coldly without giving me any room to argue. Well, considering what had happened, her distrust of me was justified—but even so, imprisonment was a bit much...
I lowered my eyebrows and put on the most pitiful expression I could, but it had no effect on Titania now. Instead, Titania frowned as if irritated, pressed down on my eyebrows with her fingers, and asked,
“To begin with, where are you planning to go once you leave this place? I don’t understand why you keep trying to get outside. Are you a puppy that’s desperate to go for a walk?”
“You really have no filter, calling your mother a puppy. Why wouldn’t I have anywhere to go? Once I leave the royal castle...”
...I didn’t particularly have anywhere to go. Come to think of it, there really wasn’t a place I could visit. I obviously couldn’t go to the confectionery shop where I had stayed in the countryside, and I didn’t have anyone in the capital among the nobles with whom I was close enough to visit in person.
The reason I had kept trying to get outside all this time was simply to put as much distance as possible between myself and Titania. But now that there was no need for that anymore, my reason for going outside had disappeared as well. Still...
“I could at least take a walk through the streets, couldn’t I? It’s so stifling staying here all the time.”
“You really are a puppy.”
Titania gave a derisive little laugh at my answer. When I let out a groan, Titania sighed softly, folded her arms, and stared down at me.
She slightly furrowed her brow as if deep in thought and tilted her head. Feeling strangely pressured by her posture, I muttered in a voice as faint as an ant crawling by,
“I—I only said it was stifling staying here all the time. Well, perhaps once in a while, just for a change of mood...”
“...Then would you like to take a walk within the royal castle?”
“A walk?”
Titania unfolded her arms, approached me, and asked. The royal castle was certainly vast, with plenty of places to walk. There was even an artificial forest built for strolling, as well as a lake Titania and I had often visited when we were young.
‘...It’s probably better than not going at all. Honestly, after being confined here for a month, my whole body is aching. Right now, I want to get outside, no matter where it is.’
I gently nodded at Titania’s suggestion. I felt like a puppy that really was desperate for a walk, but the thought of going outside after so long and breathing in the fresh air was enough to make me look forward to it.
Titania smiled brightly and continued,
“There is one condition.”
“A condition?”
“Yes, a condition.”
As she said this, Titania held out her hand to me. The gesture seemed to be telling me to take it, and I instinctively began to reach for her hand—but the hand I had extended hesitated in midair.
Was it because Titania had called me a ‘puppy’?
For some reason, I was reminded of a puppy performing the trick of offering its paw, and I couldn’t bring myself to take Titania’s hand. As I hesitated with my hand still extended, Titania watched me and giggled.
“...The condition is that you don’t leave my side during the walk. If you can promise me that, I’ll allow you to walk outside the annex.”
“...So you mean I have to go out with you every time I leave this place?”
“Yes. Exactly.”
I wanted to ask if she intended to keep watch over me, but that was precisely what Titania intended. She had said she couldn’t trust me, so she clearly planned to keep an eye on me during the walk to make sure I didn’t escape.
I thought that, for the time being, I would have to stay with Titania and rebuild the trust between us, which had hit rock bottom. No matter what I said now, Titania would surely doubt every word. Perhaps time really was the best medicine.
“...All right. I’ll do that.”
“Good. Then shall we go now?”
“Now?”
“Yes. The lake in the royal castle is close by. It’s only a short walk.”
As she spoke, Titania held her hand out to me again.
I let out a groan and merely stared at the hand Titania had extended. I had no idea how much physical contact I should allow from this girl going forward.
If I gave her even the slightest opening, she might do something strange to me again, just as she had yesterday. To avoid being kissed without warning like that again, I needed to be wary of Titania’s advances.
‘Is holding hands a normal thing? Holding hands is fine, and it should be all right as long as we don’t interlace our fingers, right? I feel bad refusing to hold her hand altogether, considering what I did... What should I do...?’
As I frowned and continued to glare at the hand extended in front of me, Titania sighed, waved the hand she had held out, and urged me to take it already. When I continued to do nothing but watch her expression—
“I won’t do anything strange, so don’t worry.”
“It’s not that I thought you were going to do anything strange...”
Embarrassed for no reason, I awkwardly took Titania’s hand. Without the slightest sign of concern, Titania held my hand and began walking slowly outside. What was this? Was I the strange one for worrying about it?
‘Somehow, I’m the only one who made a fuss. I feel like an idiot.’
*
“It’s nice to be out for a walk again after so long.”
“......”
“Don’t you think so too, Mother?”
The breeze blowing from the lake brushed pleasantly across my cheek. The scent of the lake, the earth, and the leaves—all scents I had not smelled in a long time—felt wonderful. I wanted to go straight toward the lake, but...
“......Your trust in me really is at rock bottom.”
“Please think of my feelings. Don’t you feel sorry for a daughter who’s anxious that her mother might leave her?”
I snorted and turned my head away from Titania. It wasn’t that I was foolish for worrying about her. I was foolish for letting down my guard around Titania even for a moment. After everything that had happened, I was a complete idiot for falling for it again.
Every time we walked, something clinked around my wrists, striking my ears together with the sound of the wind. This obsessive daughter had not only brought me along on a walk—she had also fastened a pair of cuffs around my wrists in case I tried to escape.
One end was attached to Titania’s hand, and the other to mine. The moment we arrived at the lake, she had cuffed me so that I couldn’t run away from her side. In this situation, there was no way I could pay attention to the lake or anything else.
“Even so, aren’t handcuffs a bit much...?”
“...If you’d rather be bound in shackles instead of handcuffs, just say so. Shall we return to your room?”
“...I’m sorry.”
At her not-quite-threat, I sighed and began walking beside the lake after Titania. The lakeside, with the sunset beginning to descend, had a truly romantic atmosphere.
The view of the lakeside beneath the setting sun was dazzlingly beautiful, and the rippling water sounded pleasantly in my ears. The lake stretching out below the hill offered such a wide-open view that it lifted my spirits.
The walk after so long was truly perfect. It was such a pleasant day that I even thought it would be nice to go boating on the lake until the sunset faded and the moon rose. Of course...
Clink—
It would have been perfect if not for the handcuffs around my wrists.
As I looked down at the lakeside glowing with sunset, I turned my head slightly and glanced at Titania standing beside me. Titania was gazing at the lake with a contented smile. Just as I turned my head back to look at the lake—
Clink.
With the sound of the chain, Titania’s finger tapped the back of my hand. Then she subtly began trying to interlace her fingers with mine so she could hold my hand. I bent my wrist and pulled away from her hand as if to say she had no chance.
Did she think I didn’t know what she was up to? Holding hands in an atmosphere like this was something lovers did! When I jerked my wrist away, the chain connecting Titania and me rattled loudly.
I had thought Titania would give up if I avoided her hand, but like the stubborn girl she was, Titania refused to surrender. She kept reaching out, determined to hold my hand somehow. I kept dodging her, determined not to let her. Our two cuffed hands began battling one another.
Tap! Tap! Rattle! Tap! Rattle!
In the midst of the tranquil lakeside scenery, the sounds of clashing chains and battling fingers rang out. Our gazes remained fixed on the lake, but our hands alone were waging a war entirely at odds with the mood.
In the end, however, stamina was naturally on the side of the younger Titania.
The moment my strength gave out, Titania seized my hand as if she had been waiting for it. Perhaps her body temperature had risen from our vigorous struggle, because the hand that grabbed mine was hotter than usual.
I turned my head and glared at Titania, but I couldn’t say a word when I saw her expression. She was smiling brightly, just as she had when she was young—a smile I hadn’t seen in a very long time.
How could I tell her to let go after seeing a smile that looked so genuinely happy? I let out a small sigh and turned my head back to admire the lake.
Our joined hands were pulled closer.
Our touching hands shifted, and our five fingers slowly interlaced.
Only lovers held hands like this. Who had ever heard of a mother and daughter holding hands this way? No matter how I thought about it, even holding hands like this didn’t seem like something a mother and daughter should do.
I felt bitter, wondering if this was really all right, but it was also true that the warmth conveyed by our joined hands after so long felt good.
In the end, I loosened our interlaced fingers and held her hand normally instead. Then I turned my head to look at Titania. Was the child’s face red because of the sunset, or because of some other emotion? Hoping it was the sunset, I held Titania’s hand and headed back toward the annex.