[Episode 110] - The Last Day
One day before entering the academy.
As the time when she would have to leave the royal capital drew near, Titania seemed to be in an extremely foul mood. She wore a sullen expression all day long, making it abundantly clear that she did not want to go to the academy.
Moreover, her displeasure continued even during the meal with the ministers. Unable to bear watching Titania sit there with her lips thrust out, the Minister of Foreign Affairs gave an awkward laugh and tried to change the mood in the dining hall.
“Haha, I can hardly believe the day has come for Her Highness the Princess to enter the academy... Time really has flown. It feels like only yesterday that Her Highness was playing in the garden and making flower crowns.”
“......”
Titania seemed unwilling even to answer, merely picking at her food and putting it into her mouth. Yet the Minister of Foreign Affairs did not give up in the face of her reaction and continued speaking.
“Ahem, Your Highness. If you happen to discover any embezzlement or immoral conduct among the teachers while at the academy, please be sure to write to me. Without fail—to me first.”
At that, the Minister of Education, who had been listening from beside him, bristled and jumped into the conversation. As the meal that might be her last with Titania descended into chaos, the Queen Dowager and I could do nothing but sigh.
“What?! There’s no way anything like that could exist at the academy where I serve as principal! Besides, if something like that does happen, you must report it to me, the principal! Not to the Minister of Foreign Affairs!”
“When it comes to matters like this, external reporting is the most important thing. If the matter is handled internally, all that follows is a slap-on-the-wrist punishment. If you tell me, I’ll see to it that the Minister of Education is removed from his position as principal—”
Clack!
Unable to endure the two ministers’ childish quarrel any longer, Titania slammed the fork in her hand onto the table. Then she glared sharply back and forth between the Minister of Foreign Affairs and the Minister of Education.
“...Grandmother, Mother. I’m sorry. I’m not feeling well, so I’ll take my leave first.”
“...Very well. Go on.”
The instant the Queen Dowager gave her permission, Titania left the dining hall without even looking back. Seeing Titania’s sharp demeanor, the Queen Dowager clicked her tongue and glared at the two ministers.
“Ah, no, we were only trying to... improve Her Highness’s mood...”
“Fools. Do you think Titania’s mood would improve just because the two of you quarreled? Watching you made me feel so stifled I thought I was going to die. No, perhaps I ought to die. To think that such idiots are ministers...”
“Your Highness, how can you say such a thing...”
Under the Queen Dowager’s scolding, the two ministers lowered their heads with meek whimpers. Even I was growing irritated just watching them. How much more irritated must Titania have been? All I could do was sigh at the two ministers’ foolish behavior.
“Putting that aside... There isn’t much time left before the promise, Queen.”
“Pardon? Ah, yes...”
At the mention of the promise, even the ministers stopped moving their utensils and began listening intently to the Queen Dowager and me. Hearing the word ‘promise’ come up in a place like this finally made it feel real.
“So, Queen, what do you intend to do once Titania enters the academy?”
“Uh, well, that, um...”
“That?”
“I haven’t decided anything in particular...”
At my answer, a heavy silence descended over the dining hall. I had even paused to choose my words, but I could not find anything suitable to say. After all, I truly had not decided what I should do.
I planned to decide how I would live from then on during the three years I could remain in the royal capital. There were still three whole years left! So even if I were suddenly asked, there was no way I could give a proper answer.
In the end, the Queen Dowager’s eyes narrowed at my lack of a plan. Unable to do anything under that sharp gaze, I could only bow my head so deeply that my nose nearly touched my plate.
“...I’m not trying to hurry you out, but I would still like you to make your plans soon. That way, the royal capital can prepare something for you as well.”
“Yes... I’ll decide as soon as possible...”
“And...”
The Queen Dowager cleared her throat with a brief “ahem” and shot me a sidelong glance. When I tilted my head at the sudden silence, the Queen Dowager gulped down the drink in the glass she held, as though her throat had gone dry.
“...Do not think that you have all that much time left.”
“...? Yes, I’ll bear that in mind...”
*
“Titania, shall I put out the candle?”
“.....”
Night had fallen, and even as bedtime approached, Titania still wore a sullen expression. She was lying with her back turned to me, seemingly still upset, and the sight pained me.
I knew that Titania was not angry with me. She simply did not want to go to the academy, did not want to be separated from me, and disliked being forced to attend against her will.
I blew out the candle with a soft breath and quickly lay down beside Titania. I moved closer to her, still lying with her back to me, and gently poked her in the side.
When I prodded her, Titania’s body jerked. Then she abruptly turned around and glared at me. There was not a trace of hatred or resentment in her gaze.
It was simply filled with dissatisfaction toward the situation.
I chuckled and pulled Titania into my arms, patting her back.
“Do you really dislike going that much?”
“...Yes. I don’t understand why I have to be unable to leave for three whole years. Shouldn’t they at least let us return once or twice? It’s not an academy. It’s a prison.”
Nestled in my arms, Titania began to whine. It was true that the academy had no vacations, and that students could not leave its grounds for three years.
But that did not mean the academy was small. The academy was as vast as a small city. There were shops inside it, along with all sorts of facilities.
In other words, the academy was no different from a small city. Its students simply could not leave that little city until they graduated after completing their years or dropped out of their own accord.
Titania, who had been fidgeting in my arms, raised her head and looked at me.
“Could I come visit here sometimes? If I ask Sister Veronica...”
“...Veronica told you, didn’t she? Since we have to avoid the Great Witch’s gaze, you can’t use proper magic at the academy. Naturally, you can’t establish a connection here, either...”
“Ah...”
Titania finally buried her face against my chest and sniffled, as though she had given up. I was worried whether this spoiled child would be able to endure the academy, but Veronica and Einsel would be there with her, so she would surely be all right.
“When I become queen, the first thing I’ll do is order the Minister of Education to create vacations at the academy. That way, everyone can return home during the holidays.”
“Your juniors will be delighted.”
To think that such a cute goal was the first thing she planned to pursue upon becoming queen.
I chuckled and patted Titania’s back. I could not see her face, but I could hear her sniffling in my arms, so I knew that Titania was crying.
I held Titania a little tighter and slowly stroked her back. This would be the last time we could remain like this, after all. So it meant that she should stay by my side today until she was satisfied.
“I don’t want to go...”
I could feel Titania’s tears against my chest.
Her trembling voice made my heart ache as though it were turning cold. I wanted to tell her not to go, but I could not say that, so I merely forced myself to smile calmly.
For Titania, who was sniffling and crying in my arms, all I could do was hold her more and more tightly. The more closely I embraced her, the less Titania wanted to pull away from my side.
And so Titania and I did not part until we fell asleep. I prayed that this embrace had comforted Titania, if only a little, and simply held her while stroking her back.
As my consciousness faded, I fell asleep listening to Titania’s heartbeat. I felt none of the tension that came with the arrival of this day at last. I was merely depressed at the thought of separating this child from my side.
*
Late in the night, when everyone else was asleep.
Unable to fall asleep, Titania slipped out from under the covers and looked down at Vivian, who was sleeping soundly.
‘My lovely mother.’
Titania took her time committing Vivian’s face to memory.
She would not be able to look upon it for the next three years, so she wanted to engrave even a little more of her mother’s face into her eyes. Carefully reaching out, Titania gently smoothed Vivian’s disheveled hair.
‘What should I do? She’s so lovely.’
Titania carefully tucked her own hair, which had fallen forward, behind her ear. It would be troublesome if it brushed against her mother and woke her. Holding her breath, Titania gazed at Vivian’s face.
Her face was pure white in the moonlight pouring through the gap in the window, while her golden hair glittered like stars embroidered across the sky. Beneath the straight bridge of her nose, her bright-red lips were slightly parted.
When Titania inhaled deeply, the familiar scent of her mother tickled the tip of her nose. The fragrance calmed her heart, yet also made her chest rise and fall so restlessly, and Titania breathed it in again and again.
She was truly lovely.
To think that such a lovely person was her mother.
To think that she loved such a lovely person.
At the thought, her chest fluttered.
Her heart tingled, and her chest tightened.
She was happy simply by looking at her mother’s face. Titania was so happy in this moment that she wished it could continue forever, that she and her mother could be the only two people in this world.
As she continued to drink in her mother’s face, her gaze kept drifting toward Vivian’s slightly parted lips. Without realizing it, Titania swallowed dryly and found herself unable to look away.
‘Just a little...’
Titania moved her finger and tapped Vivian’s lips.
Her mother must have been deeply asleep, for she did not react. The sensation of those lips against her fingertip was dizzying and stimulating beyond words.
Then a wicked thought occurred to her.
They would be separated for three years. It felt too regrettable to part with her mother like this. She wanted to grow a little closer, and she needed something that would let her remember her mother a little more vividly.
Yes, if possible, perhaps a kiss...
Gulp. Titania swallowed dryly and ran her tongue over her lips.
She stared down at Vivian with an expression as though her mouth were watering and began to deliberate. Would it really be all right? Her mother was sleeping soundly, and once she fell asleep, she never woke until morning.
‘So even if I kiss her now, Mother won’t wake up.’
The inexplicable courage brought by the early hours of the morning was frightening. Perhaps it was because her emotions had taken precedence over her reason, but Titania decided to be honest with her heart. If not now, the next time she saw her mother would be three years later.
In the end, Titania stroked Vivian’s cheek, lowered her head, and shyly pressed her lips to those small, red lips. Her heart trembled so violently that it hurt, despite the kiss making not even the faintest sound.
Only then did the reality sink in.
The reality that she had crossed a line.
The reality that she could never return to the way things had been.
She had kissed her mother’s lips many times, but never once had she been the one to kiss them directly. Perhaps it had happened a few times when she was young, but this was the first time she had kissed her mother while carrying such aching emotions.
Her mother remained asleep, unaware that her lips had been stolen. Those parted lips, oblivious even to the fact that her daughter had stolen them while harboring such feelings, seemed to tempt Titania, as though telling her that she could do it once more without being caught.
‘Would it really be all right to do it one more time?’
Titania’s lips parted, but soon she let out a quiet sigh and burrowed back under the covers. She would have to be satisfied with this for today. They could look forward to the next time, three years from now, as she nestled into her mother’s arms.
‘When we meet again, will she treat me like an adult?’
For that matter, what did it even mean to be treated like an adult?
What did I want to do to my mother?
Titania knew exactly what the emotion slowly crawling up from the depths of her heart was, but she decided to bury it for now. It was not yet an emotion she ought to possess.
And so she took a short sleep, and dawn began to break.
The day she would set out for the academy had dawned.