Chapter 94
The first floor of the inn, which they had entered as if drawn by the appetizing aroma, was none other than a restaurant. It was crowded with people, as though it served not only guests staying at the inn but ordinary customers as well, and an employee guided them to a table deep inside.
“We’ll prepare your order as reserved.”
After the employee spoke kindly and left, Rowena sat there, feeling half-bewitched. Killian, on the other hand, sat calmly with his long legs crossed and rested his elbows on the table. Lacing his fingers together, he propped his chin on his hands and looked at her.
Under the piercing gaze of those vivid blue eyes, Rowena quietly averted her own.
“You’re going to stare a hole through me.”
“What were you just thinking?”
“……
Who knows? Nothing.”
“My apologies for failing to live up to your expectations.”
There was laughter in his voice. At the mischievous joke, her ears felt as though they were burning.
“Mind your manners. You’re the one who said this was our second meeting.”
Her attempt to brush it off as if nothing had happened failed splendidly. Instead of answering, Killian lightly shrugged as if to say he understood. Ahem. Rowena cleared her throat and subtly changed the subject.
“By the way, how did you know about this place?”
A little distance away, a cheerful family seated at the next table came into view. A son who had only just begun to speak was eating with his parents seated across from each other with him between them, all of them smiling.
While Rowena’s gaze was unconsciously stolen by the sight, a hand reached out and tucked a loose lock of her hair behind her ear. Startled, she turned her head, only to find that, at some point, an array of colorful dishes had been set on the table.
“When I was studying abroad, I once slipped out of the dormitory late at night with my friends.”
Killian naturally picked up the utensils, served a portion of salad for her from the bowl, and held it out to her.
Unable to believe either the man’s actions or his words, Rowena only blinked before awkwardly spearing some salad with her fork and putting it into her mouth. The fresh vegetables, coated in dressing, seemed to melt over her tongue.
Her admiration for the refreshing dressing and crisp texture was brief. At the sight of him staring at her intently yet again, Rowena wiped her mouth with a napkin.
“You’re not saying you were a delinquent student, are you? I don’t believe it.”
As if trying to shift the mood, she took a small breath and spoke as though interrogating him. Killian lifted the corners of his mouth and shrugged.
“It would be more accurate to say I had my share of deviations.”
Ordinarily, she should not have listened to a word he said. But when stories of his childhood came up, she found herself perking up despite herself. Rowena superimposed Damian over Killian’s face.
In her imagination sat a boy much younger than him, yet a little more mature than Damian.
“You had friends…… No.”
At the slight narrowing of Killian’s eyes, Rowena slipped her gaze away and changed her question.
“What kind of deviations?”
In the end, curiosity won over pride. In any case, there was not much time left for her to face him like this, and above all, the premise of a “second meeting” shook Rowena. It was a conversation that a man and woman who had only just met and begun to develop an interest in each other could perfectly well have. Perhaps swept up in the bustling, lively atmosphere, the words came easily.
“What sort of deviations did you get up to?”
“As I just said, I broke the dormitory curfew with my friends and roamed around until late at night. Sometimes I didn’t do my homework and copied a friend’s the morning it was due.”
The more she listened, the more it felt like she was hearing an absurd adventure story. As Rowena’s expression grew increasingly doubtful, Killian continued, paying it no mind.
“There was a teacher who gave extremely fastidious and harsh punishments. Once, we moved every chicken from the school barn into his bed. We laughed as we watched him wake up and lose his mind over the awful smell of chicken droppings and all the feathers.”
It was a funny scene just to imagine. Rowena pictured it despite herself and let out a small laugh.
“My goodness. You really were an incorrigible troublemaker. It’s a wonder you managed to graduate.”
It had been foolish of her to occasionally doubt whether the chaotic Damian really was Killian’s son. She was laughing without realizing it, but no response came back. When Rowena stopped laughing and belatedly looked at Killian, he was gazing at her as if entranced before he finally picked up his utensils.
“Graduating was easy. My grades were always near the top.”
“What about the friends you played with?”
“Several of them failed.”
It was something from his childhood. Swallowing the story of how one of them had sold information about him to his political enemies and had not managed to graduate safely, Killian shrugged.
“……
It’s a wonder they didn’t cut ties with you…….”
“Here is the main course.”
Before she could finish speaking, an employee approached, cleared away the empty bowl, and began setting down the next dish from the tray. It was lamb cooked over an open flame. There was no gamy smell at all, and the meat looked tender. The moment Rowena picked up her knife, Killian took her plate as it was and cut the meat for her instead. While Rowena quietly closed her mouth at the gesture, which made him seem like an incomparably tender man, a question came flying.
“What about you?”
“Pardon?”
“Did you have friends? Other than that friend I saw before.”
It was obvious whom he meant by that friend he had seen before. At the face that suddenly came to mind, a shadow briefly crossed Rowena’s own.
“I didn’t.”
When she lifted the head she had lowered for a moment, the other person’s face was asking why.
“It was a very remote countryside village, and all my neighbors were around my parents’ age. There was only one person my age.”
The person she had finally befriended after coming up to the capital, the one she had believed to be a “friend,” had been none other than Melissa. The one who had trapped her and shamelessly remained by her side.
But she had been kinder than anyone. Rowena had thought there must have been unavoidable circumstances, yet when she remembered coldly shaking off her hand in her sense of betrayal, a corner of her heart grew heavy.
“……
What happened to Melissa?”
“I heard she went back to her hometown. I don’t know anything after that.”
“Did you perhaps use violence against her, or harm her……?”
“I did not. It wouldn’t have been what you wanted.”
His calm answer put her at ease. As Rowena let out a sigh of relief, Killian, who had finished cutting all of her steak at some point, held it out to her again.
“Thank you.”
Rowena awkwardly thanked him, picked up her fork, and brought a piece to her mouth. It was sweeter and more tender than it looked. As she savored the taste, Killian asked another question.
“What kind of girl was she?”
“That’s.”
After a brief pause, Rowena replied.
“I’ve already told you before. Though I’m sure you’ve forgotten it all.”
She recalled herself at around twenty, pouring out her life story to a man she had only just met on a train. A very young lady who had carried vague expectations and curiosity about the future, as well as a little anxiety.
While she was lost in thought, dwelling on the past, Rowena doubted her ears at the answer that came back.
“You said you raised a pair of goats. Three hens, too, and though you had no sheep, you had one sheepdog and one cat.”
“…….”
“You said you had named them all. The dog’s name was Roro, wasn’t it?”
“……
That’s right.”
Rowena’s eyes widened, and she nodded in a daze.
“I only told you that once. How do you remember?”
“I told you. My grades were good.”
Killian smiled faintly, and a beat later, he cut his own meat and put it into his mouth.
“I thought you hadn’t been listening.”
“As if that could be. I fell in love with you at first sight.”
At the words he tossed out so casually, Rowena nearly choked. She hurriedly drank some water and only barely managed to swallow the piece of meat caught in her throat before she came to her senses.
“Why would you suddenly say something like that?”
“I told you, didn’t I? I’m going to use every means at my disposal.”
She protested belatedly, but what came back was an unruffled reply. Irritated by the way he had changed only now, she wanted to provoke him.
“Don’t you think you’re shameless, saying that now?”
“…….”
“You say you’re sorry to me, but you won’t do what I want.”
At her following words, Killian merely looked at her in silence instead of answering. What Rowena wanted was obvious. For him to leave her forever. And she did not even try to hide it. It felt as though someone had lightly trampled over his heart. He had thought he had grown used to it, but his entire body still went numb. Toward Killian, who was struggling to keep his expression under control, Rowena drove in the wedge.
“Why don’t we stop here? It would be a waste of time for both of us.”
“……
I can’t do that.”
After a long while, Killian answered, then added as if chewing and swallowing the words.
“Because I’m more desperate than you think.”
“What…….”
Startled by the unexpected words, Rowena sat there blankly, and before long, the final dessert was served. After she took a few spoonfuls of sorbet, or perhaps only pretended to, the meal ended.
As soon as they climbed into the carriage, Rowena drew back the closed curtain. The days were growing longer. The sun, still lingering beyond the horizon, cast sunset light in every direction. With the sound of the coachman cracking his whip, the carriage set off. Rowena watched the passing carriages and pedestrians, then turned her head. At the same time, her eyes met Killian’s, who seemed to have been looking at her for who knew how long.
Sitting alone across from each other in a spacious restaurant and sitting across from each other in a carriage without saying a word were incomparably different. Swallowing dryly in tension, Rowena asked, pretending nothing was wrong.
“Are we going back to the mansion now?”
“No.”
Killian shook his head and answered quietly.
“There is one last place we need to go.”
“……
I’m tired right now…….”
Rowena’s voice, which had been trying to refuse indirectly, gradually trailed off. As if his claim of desperation had not been a lie, the vivid blue gaze staring quietly at her sealed her lips. In the end, Rowena was the first to avert her eyes and nodded.
“……
All right. I hope it isn’t far.”