# 68
68. The Maid and the Young Master (2)
Robert lay with his eyes closed as if dead. Anxious, I examined Robert's complexion.
"Why is the young master like this? He kept trying to go out, so I thought it might be dangerous and forced him to stay in his room, but what could have happened? Perhaps he's unwell somewhere..."
"He's fallen asleep."
"What?"
The nanny, who had regained her composure much faster than me, held Robert in her arms and patted his back. Just as she said, even breathing sounds came from Robert, who had his cheek resting on her shoulder. Only then did my heart ease a bit. He had fallen so frighteningly that I thought something serious had happened.
Robert, who stirred slightly, half-opened his eyes. As the child's gaze turned toward me, I grew tense, but his hazy violet eyes glistened with moisture.
"Mommy..."
"Yes, young master. Don't worry and go back to sleep."
The nanny patted Robert's back again. His small hand clutched the hem of her clothes. Though he closed his eyes again, his face was scrunched up. As if having a nightmare. A teardrop fell from between his closed eyelids, dampening the nanny's shoulder.
After soothing Robert and laying him on the bed, the nanny looked back at me and smiled warmly. She seemed to have read my mind. I had been anxiously checking Robert's condition repeatedly.
"I'm sorry."
I had acted carelessly, thinking he was just a stubborn child. He was still so young—he might have been crying while knocking on the door, and yet I had pretended not to know. All of it filled me with regret and apologies toward Robert.
When I bowed, the nanny waved her hands in fluster.
"No, no. He just fell asleep, that's all."
"Nothing happened this time, but leaving the young master alone and stepping away was my negligence. I should have stayed by his side the whole time."
"You only stepped away briefly to fetch the young master's belongings. It's alright."
The nanny, speaking with a kind smile, looked at Robert again. Her hand stroking his chubby cheek and sweeping across his forehead overflowed with affection.
"Is it very difficult serving the young master?"
"No, it's not."
"You can be honest with me. The young master throws tantrums at Ann especially, doesn't he?"
"...No, it's not."
I couldn't immediately deny it. As if understanding my feelings, the nanny let out a short laugh.
"It's because he's lonely."
Startled by her sudden words, I stared at the back of the nanny's head as she continued speaking.
"The master passed away early in an accident, and the madam has been so busy with family affairs that she hasn't had time to be with the young master. There were many days when they couldn't even see each other's faces all day long. By the time the young master took his first steps, it had already become an ordinary routine. He came to this mansion also to ease the loneliness of the young master, who had to spend time without the madam."
I had no idea at all. With his cheerful personality, I never sensed any such signs... Who would have thought a sad story was hidden behind that infuriating face.
"But even here, I was the only one by his side, so he must have still been very lonely. Then Ann appeared—how happy he must have been."
Happy to have someone to play tricks on?
"Because there was one more person who would stay by his side every day."
"..."
"No matter how meanly he acts or how much he throws tantrums, you don't leave his side—that's why the young master must have been glad."
Her voice, mixed with laughter, rang gently. I rolled my eyes. The circumstances of young Robert were pitiful, and her words sounded quite sad, but when I recalled what that child had done to me, that sadness quickly turned to anger.
If I get lonely twice more, my head will explode.
"So please understand that he throws tantrums because he's a lonely child."
Unable to bring myself to rebut the nanny who smiled at me again, I nodded. She also offered advice that it would be best to accommodate the young master's demands as much as possible since he was stubborn. It wasn't particularly helpful advice, but I just kept nodding along.
So does that mean I should also give in when he wants to climb onto the iron horse statue? As if sensing my dilemma, the nanny spoke up firmly.
"Don't give in to climbing on the iron horse statue—it's dangerous."
"Understood."
I nodded one last time and looked at Robert again. His face had become peaceful, breathing evenly in his sleep. At least when sleeping, he looked like a cute baby angel from a fairy tale.
"Ugly, hmph."
The warm feelings in my heart scattered in an instant.
It seems the nanny was wrong this time. This kid definitely hates me.
* * *
"Huh? Where are you going?"
From afar, Johnny called out to me. His face, even waving his hand, was brimming with smiles. What's wrong with him. I frowned, but Johnny approached cheerfully, undeterred by my reaction. I didn't want to deal with him. I tried to slip away quickly, but he insisted on blocking my path.
"You look tired? Must be busy."
"Yeah. I'm very busy, so get out of the way."
When I took a step to the right, Johnny followed and stood in front of me. When I moved to the left this time, he also took a step to follow. Is this for real? I had put on a fierce expression, but it didn't work—Johnny just beamed and flapped both hands.
"Just listen to me for a second. So, Alicia, you see!"
Without my permission, Johnny started babbling about things with Alicia. I grabbed my throbbing forehead.
Maybe the advice to do better had worked last time—Johnny and Alicia's relationship must have improved dramatically. Since then, every time Johnny saw me, he would ramble on about things with Alicia. Alicia did this, Alicia did that. Even though I had no desire to listen at all.
"So anyway."
"Move. I'm busy."
"I know. Just hear this one thing and go."
I was tired and exhausted right now. Moreover, I didn't want to listen to someone else's love story. When I glared as if to say I wouldn't stand for it if he didn't move, Johnny's rambling voice came to an abrupt stop, apparently sensing my mood.
"Ah, alright. Then let's talk about something else."
"Something else, what."
"How are you doing these days? I heard you've been assigned to serve the young master."
"Me? Well..."
I said that much and let out a deep sigh. Then I laughed hollowly like an old man who had lived his whole life. Johnny's eyes went wide.
"You look really tired?"
"I can't say I'm not."
"Why, does that little thing ignore you just because you're a servant?"
Should I say that's the case or not? He did ignore me, but he wasn't terribly severe about it. Having experienced worse contempt before, I could snort and brush this off. His capricious tantrums were somewhat bearable because the other party was a child, and when I thought about it as the nanny had said—that it stemmed from loneliness—some pity even arose in me.
Of course, that feeling didn't last long.
Robert threw tantrums at me endlessly without tiring. Calling them tantrums was putting it nicely—it was closer to throwing fits. Nanny, I think you were wrong after all. He just hates me.
I shook my head. Always giving in to him had made him develop such an arrogant personality. Someone beside him should have firmly told him no, but Robert had no such person by his side. The nanny who had shared his short life had only indulged Robert's tantrums too much.
"You said you'd only be at the mansion for a short while, right? Then just endure it a little."
"I know that too."
I knew, but there were moments when I wanted to throw everything away.
Like right now.
"I want to go out."
"You may not."
"I want to go out!"
Robert flopped onto the floor and flailed his arms and legs. His short legs kicked hard against my knees. As the pain intensified, my patience gradually turned to anger.
Robert mostly spent time playing with toys in his room or wandering around the iron horse statue. When the nanny was there, he would go out for walks, but with me, it was either staying in the room or wandering the corridors. The nanny had asked me to stay inside the mansion when we were alone together.
'He's still young. And with his tendency... you understand, right?'
Understood all too well. She meant to refrain from going out since we couldn't predict where he might dart off.
"I want to go out! I'm going out!"
But today, the young master's tantrums were particularly severe.
"When the nanny returns later, you can go out together."
"I want to go now!"
"If we go out just the two of us, the nanny will be disappointed."
"I can go out with Nanny later too."
"..."
Robert not only spoke faster than his peers, but he articulated particularly well at times like this. This was where the marks of his good upbringing showed.
Looking at Robert rolling around on the floor, I was at a loss for words. No need to clean the floor today. Moreover, with him screaming to the point my ears went deaf, I couldn't collect myself.
That stubborn streak really is no less than my former master's. Maybe even worse. Since his life wasn't at stake, I had used my trump card against that master, but I couldn't do the same to a child, so I only burned with frustration inside.
"Instead of that, let's do something else."
"Something else?"
Stopping his rolling, Robert opened his eyes wide. I nodded.
"Yes, something the young master wants to do."
Robert seemed to ponder for a moment, then smiled broadly.
But that something else wasn't particularly welcome to me either. Robert gripped the leg of the iron horse statue tightly and looked at me pleadingly.
"Do you want to climb up?"
Robert nodded once. Why does he keep wanting to go up there? Looking at Robert with his eyes sparkling brightly, I wavered. The nanny had said to accommodate the young master's demands as much as possible, but even she had said no to this.
As if sensing my thoughts, Robert's face scrunched up. He looked ready to burst into tears at any moment, so I hurriedly scooped him into my arms.
"You have to stay still."
"Yeah!"
Only then did Robert smile broadly.
He seemed utterly unreliable, but it should be fine if he just went up briefly and came right back down. I lifted Robert with all my strength up to the saddle height. His small body wobbled as he climbed onto the saddle.
The child's eyes sparkled as he leaned his body forward dangerously. Flustered, I grabbed Robert's legs tightly.
"Young master, it's dangerous. Hold onto the horse firmly."
"Yeah, yeah."
He answered well enough, but kept leaning his body forward. He wasn't looking down below. His gaze was directed much further away. Finding that strange, I also looked in the direction Robert was looking. What Robert was looking at was beyond the window.
Beyond the window, there was nothing but the trees surrounding the mansion. The only people passing by were a few servants of the estate. Yet Robert couldn't take his eyes off the window. He stretched his neck and kept trying to peer outside. As if trying to see something.
What on earth was he trying to see?
But the sparkling eyes gradually lost their light, and his small face drooped. That change struck me as odd.
"Robert."
I was startled by the voice that suddenly rang out. Joeli was standing beside us, I didn't know when she had approached. She was alone.
Robert's drooping face shifted toward Joeli.
"Your mother isn't coming. Come down now."
At Joeli's words, Robert looked down at me and shifted his body. I realized he was trying to get off the iron horse. Until just moments ago, he wouldn't even listen to me, but this time he was compliant. I raised both arms and carefully gathered Robert into my embrace. Robert buried his face in my chest.