Chapter 159.
While greeting the guests attending the banquet, Herdin spotted a familiar face among them.
"Count Felton."
It was the nobleman who had attended the first banquet Blair hosted as Duchess last spring, accompanied by his heavily pregnant wife.
Now, beside him stood his wife and a young daughter who bore an equal resemblance to both of them.
He had always had a gentle demeanor, but he greeted Herdin with a noticeably brighter face than a year ago.
"Thank you for inviting us, Your Grace."
"The pleasure is mine. I appreciate that even young Lady Felton is here to grace the occasion."
The child, nestled in her father's arms, seemed to realize they were talking about her and stared intently at Herdin.
'I wonder if she'll be shy around strangers like Asiel.'
Just as Herdin had that thought while noticing the child's gaze, the little girl—who had been watching him for a while—suddenly laughed brightly and clapped her hands.
Surprised by this unexpected reaction, Herdin looked at the child with wonder and said,
"It seems Lady Felton is quite sociable. I heard children this age are usually very shy around strangers."
However, Count Felton, the child's own father, appeared flustered, as if seeing his daughter behave this way for the first time.
"No, actually she's usually so shy that she hides away... How strange."
While the two men were puzzling over this, Countess Felton, who had been watching her daughter from the side, chimed in with a smile.
"Children like pretty and handsome people just as adults do."
"Can children really make that distinction?"
"My, of course. In fact, they're more honest than adults. Liking beautiful things is human instinct."
"Instinct, you say..."
"And Your Grace is handsome enough that anyone, adult or child, must admit it. There won't be a child who doesn't like you. Right, Lira?"
"Yeah."
The child answered while sucking on her fingers, not understanding what her mother was saying. But her eyes remained fixed on Herdin.
Only then did Count Felton understand his daughter's feelings and burst into laughter.
"Oh, my. Lira, your uncle would wail if he saw this."
Count Felton, who laughed for a while with his wife, joked to Herdin.
"My younger brother will be quite envious of you, Your Grace. He absolutely adores Lira, but when he saw her after months apart, she burst into tears the moment she saw him."
Herdin gazed silently at the child who was still staring only at him, then turned his gaze toward where Blair was.
Blair was greeting guests at a slight distance.
Asiel, held in her arms, would wave his hand when guided by his mother's hand, or stare at the guests with a blank expression. Though he didn't welcome the guests, he didn't cry or fuss either.
Watching that sight, Herdin mocked himself.
'Envious, huh...'
Even if every child in the world liked him, what was there to envy when his own beloved son burst into tears the moment he saw him?
He felt he could somewhat understand the feelings of Count Felton's younger brother, who was said to be hurt by such a thing.
"We seem to have kept you too long, Your Grace. Then we'll see you in the banquet hall later."
Seeing other guests arriving, Count and Countess Felton bid farewell to Herdin before heading inside.
Absently watching their retreating figures, Herdin noticed the child in the Count's arms waving her small hand toward him.
He watched that sight for a moment before giving a slight wave back. Then the child smiled sweetly.
A bitter smile spread across Herdin's lips as he watched.
* * *
After the banquet ended, Herdin, who had finished bathing before Blair, came to Asiel's room.
Asiel, who had been enthusiastic about greeting guests as the young duke, had fallen fast asleep before the banquet even ended.
Herdin quietly observed his son sleeping with an angelic appearance, then gently tapped the small, fern-like hand with his index finger. Then, even in his sleep, Asiel tightly grasped his finger.
That single small gesture eased his heart. But that smile was fleeting.
The child only allowed him close after falling asleep.
Watching Asiel like this, he sometimes wondered if it was karma from his past life.
'Of course, Asiel wouldn't have memories of the past, so that wouldn't be the reason.'
Still, it was fine.
He wouldn't give up on Asiel, and so even if it was slow, he would learn more about the child and things would improve.
Of course, since Asiel cried whenever he saw him, he was a bit worried about the child struggling in the process.
But what worried him more than Asiel was Blair, who wanted the three of them—husband, wife, and son—to do many things together.
A month ago, as Blair's birthday approached, he asked if there was anything she wanted or needed.
She said she didn't need gifts, but after hesitating for a while, she cautiously brought it up as if unable to resist his urging.
'Then... I'd like to paint a family portrait.'
'A family portrait?'
'Yes. The three of us together.'
Come to think of it, they hadn't painted a family portrait in the past life.
More accurately, they had never painted one 'together.'
He had kept his distance from Blair and frequently left the mansion, and Blair had painted a family portrait with just her and Asiel. Herdin, who wasn't present, was drawn separately by the painter.
And Herdin would only discover much later that a painting completed without him was hanging in the mansion.
But he wasn't the only one whose heart ached whenever he saw that painting.
What he hadn't been able to realize in his past life, consumed by his own emotions, he belatedly guessed upon seeing his wife's face as she carefully made the request.
Since it was her wish, he wanted to grant it no matter what.
Even if he couldn't erase the wounds of the past life entirely, he could replace them with different memories.
That very day, Herdin made an appointment with the most promising painter from the private art museum.
The earliest available date was in half a month.
'But at this rate, I wonder if Asiel and I will be able to paint together...'
As he was sighing and watching the sleeping child, he sensed a familiar presence quietly walking in.
Blair, whose hair was still not fully dry, was approaching.
"Is Asiel still sleeping?"
"He must have been very tired. He woke up once but didn't even fuss."
"That's understandable. He received so many guests very composedly as the young duke today. He didn't cry even once despite there being many strangers."
Blair, who had been chattering about the child's commendable behavior as usual, belatedly fell silent, but the words had already been spoken.
"He's certainly our son."
Herdin said it as if praising Asiel, but Blair caught the bitter smile that flashed across his face in that brief moment.
She too had sensed that Asiel cried whenever he saw Herdin.
Though he had never shown it openly in front of her, she could imagine how hurtful it must be to be rejected by his beloved son.
Blair sat down beside him on the edge of the bed next to the crib and spoke.
"Herdin, maybe... it could be my fault."
"...Your fault?"
"When Asiel was in my womb, I wonder if he sensed me hating and resenting you."
At her words, Herdin furrowed his brow.
When it came to matters involving Asiel, Blair would become surprisingly strong, but she would also become easily frightened by trivial things and grow weak-hearted.
And right now, it seemed to be the latter.
"I shouldn't have let the child feel such negative emotions."
Blair's eyes, gazing at the sleeping Asiel, were tinged with guilt.
She had hoped the child wouldn't hate his father.
That feeling would have remained unchanged even if she and Herdin had ultimately gone their separate ways.
Regardless of her own feelings, she had wanted the baby to feel only good emotions, and it seemed like the strained relationship between son and father was entirely her fault.
Watching her, Herdin grabbed her hand and stopped her words.
"Blair. If Asiel was influenced by his mother's feelings as you say, then that's entirely my fault. Not yours."
"But..."
"If that's the case, then this is simply karma from my past life that I must bear."
"..."
"But if that's really the case, the solution might be surprisingly simple."
At the mention of a simple solution, Blair looked up at him with wide eyes.
Instead of answering immediately, Herdin pulled her into an embrace and lay down on the bed. As a result, Blair's slender body ended up completely draped over his large frame.
It was a posture he liked. One where he could fully feel her body heat, scent, and weight pouring onto him.
"Herdin?"
When Blair looked at him with questioning eyes, he chuckled and answered a beat later.
"You just need to love me more. Hold me more often, kiss me more. Especially when Asiel is watching."
So that was his grand method.
Blair's eyes narrowed as she looked at him.
"...So Asiel is being used?"
"I'm being serious here."
True to his words, his face held both unconcealed playfulness and a decidedly serious expression simultaneously.
Looking at him, Blair understood his true intentions.
'He's saying this to comfort me.'
Though, of course, some selfish motives were probably mixed in as well.
But mulling over his words, she thought they weren't entirely without merit.
Since Asiel trusted and loved his mother, he might feel more warmly toward a man his mother loved.
Then suddenly, she felt like laughing.
Because the man who had devised such a scheme just to receive a few more kisses was adorable.
Blair let out a small laugh and rested her head against his chest.
Hearing his heart beating fiercely, she felt like everything would be alright.