Chapter 34
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Taxpayer I
Shin No-a
1
Since the topic of civil servants came up, I'll mention that in Korean modern fantasy, civil servants appear with suspicious frequency.
"Hello~ Ah, you're entering the Gate? Could you show me your Hunter license?"
"Oh my. This license has expired, sir. I can't let you in like this. Please go to the Hunter Management Bureau and renew it right away."
"What? You're asking me to let it slide just this once? Ha, what exactly do you take us for?"
For example, 'Gate Management Civil Servants.'
East Asians have loved civil servants so much for generations that they're a breed of civil servant enthusiasts who even applied bureaucracy to the hell ruled by King Yama.
If you're a true East Asian, rather than feeling terror at a monster wave, you should rightly lament, "No, those barbarian monsters are so foolish and unfortunate that they still haven't learned civilization!" and then transmit bureaucracy to them, thereby creating a state system of King Monster - Middle Management Monster - Low-level Management Monster.
How could there be exceptions to the exercise of solemn national law just because it's an end-of-days chaos?
Of course, our world didn't have Gate administrators, but other types of civil servants certainly existed.
"Funeral Director Awakened."
"Yes?"
"It's almost June... have you filed your comprehensive income tax return with the National Tax Service?"
"Ah."
At No Do-ha's words, I snapped to attention with a gasp.
"Right. It's already that time of year. Thank you for pointing it out."
"Heh. If you put it off because it's annoying, it'll become a headache. Don't they just collect it however they want later? You should run to the tax office as soon as work ends today..."
"That's true. Well, I can't exactly pay taxes anyway... but let me go handle it quickly."
Indeed.
With the anger of the military that burned through youth forgotten, with the National Assembly members' gold badges buried in the dirt, and with no one giving a damn about any of that—in an era where survival has become a cheap joke——
The National Tax Service still existed.
Today, I thought I'd talk about the Republic of Korea government's final legacy, the traces of collapsed ruined buildings, a minor bizarre entity called the 'National Tax Service Branch.'
2
Kak-talk-
The first time I received that familiar yet strange KakaoTalk notification sound was in the 56th iteration. It was a spring day, May 4th.
"...Hmm?"
At first, I thought my ears were playing tricks on me.
Since Earth's genre spectacularly drifted into apocalypse, words like 'phone call,' 'text message,' and 'communication' had been deleted from humanity's dictionary.
'Did a KakaoTalk sound just ring?'
With skepticism, I opened my smartphone.
But what's this. After nearly a year, wasn't the red letter [1] majestically engraved above the KakaoTalk app?
Like a kindergartner receiving KakaoTalk for the first time in my life, I frantically checked the message.
――――――――――
[Notice Talk Arrival]
'The Republic of Korea Falling Again'
'A Nation of Citizens Dying Together'
An electronic document sent by the National Tax Service has arrived.
Hello. This is a notice from the National Tax Service.
May is the month for filing and paying comprehensive income tax.
The National Tax Service has pre-calculated your comprehensive income tax, so please check the notice below and conveniently file and pay via ARS phone (☎4444-4444).
■ Filing Inquiries: ☎444
――――――――――
"......"
After checking the message, the pressure in my expression dropped compared to before checking.
In other words, I could also describe it as the steam having escaped.
"Ugh, come on. What is this? A ghost text."
Ghost text.
Since the end of days arrived, such bizarre entities had occasionally appeared. This was also why electronic devices including cell phones were treated as Grade 1 hazardous materials.
It was an era of infinite competition where even bizarre entities struggled to survive.
To appeal even slightly differently from others, they had to aim for diversification of species—not just ghost texts, but ghost phone calls, ghost websites, ghost radio, ghost television, and so on.
Virtually the only safe communication network on the Korean Peninsula was SG Net, but considering that even SG Net had a history of being contaminated by 'Hero Syndrome,' the entire world was a safety blind spot.
And the method for dealing with such ghost texts was surprisingly simple.
'Ignore it.'
Just completely ignore it.
English has a saying that curiosity kills the cat. Nowadays, curiosity has leveled up and not only kills cats but also hunts humans quite frequently.
In the first place, on the Korean Peninsula during this era, let alone the National Tax Service, government organizations themselves couldn't be found. Naturally, ignoring texts demanding comprehensive income tax payments was the correct answer.
But the very next day.
"Ah, hyung-nim. Did you receive the text?"
"Hm? What text?"
"You know, that text from the National Tax Service telling you to pay taxes. It's a huge commotion on SG Net right now."
"...You received it too?"
The situation changed a bit.
"Ah, um, well... I received one too. A letter."
"What? A letter?"
"Yes, yes......"
Sim A-ryeon hesitantly held out a letter. The envelope was already torn open. Glancing through the letter, the exact same content as the notice talk was printed there.
"...This is quite a serious problem."
An ominous feeling crept up my spine. A sensation like cold fingerprints fondling my vertebrae.
"R-right? I thought the guild master was playing a prank, but when Seo-gyu said he received the same text......"
"Where did you find the letter?"
"W-when I woke up, it was placed on my bed. Right next to my pillow......"
There's no need to mention it, but...... my guild hideout's security boasted an insane level. In the 89th iteration, the guild got destroyed in one shot by Goyori, but that was because Goyori was just abnormal.
Even if not Lupin but Lupin's grandfather came, it would be impossible to evade my surveillance and simply leave a letter in Sim A-ryeon's bedroom and depart.
If the opponent were human, that is.
[I received the exact same message.]
The Saintess's testimony delivered the decisive blow.
[When I woke up at dawn and opened the front door, a letter was wedged in the doorframe.]
"What about other Awakened?"
[The same phenomenon is occurring all across the country. People with smartphones received notice talks, and letters were sent to everyone else.]
The Saintess's originally emotionless voice dropped even lower, becoming more inorganic.
[Funeral Director. More importantly, no one witnessed 'the moment the letters arrived.']
"Excuse me?"
[In other words, no one observed the appearance of the mailman who delivered the letters.]
The Saintess's words were as follows.
This morning, something happened at a certain guild in Incheon that the Saintess was monitoring with 'Clairvoyance.'
This guild, while not as much as mine, had quite a sturdy hideout. The hideout was located underground, consisting of multiple steel doors and several guards.
To illustrate simply:
――――――――――――――――――
■ ♙ ■ ♙ ■ ♙ ■
Door Guard Door Guard Door Guard Door
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The guards took turns standing watch. In short, this guild always had 'personnel who didn't sleep.'
Yet this morning, the guild members all discovered mail without exception the moment they opened their eyes.
Under their pillows.
"......"
[The same message was sent not only to Awakened but also to ordinary people. Funeral Director. In my judgment, the 'National Tax Service comprehensive income tax letter' is......]
"Not an ordinary bizarre entity."
[Yes. It's definitely a bizarre entity that exerts influence over the entire Korean Peninsula.]
I could only let out a hollow laugh.
...There existed an unidentified being that would extract taxes even if it became a ghost.
3
-Anonymous: Called the National Tax Service lol.
If asked to name the most important virtue for navigating these treacherous end times, it would be the caution of not just crossing a stone bridge but tapping it first—and then still not crossing.
But among Awakened, there were occasionally reckless types who lived their lives with their livers sticking out of their abdomens. Usually such people tended to book their tickets to the River Styx early, but sometimes there were fine specimens.
The author of a verification post uploaded to SG Net that day was one of those extremely rare endangered species.
-Called 4444-4444 exactly as written in the notice talk. Everyone around me said not to do it, but I was like, what's the worst that could happen, death? lol
-When I dialed the number, it actually connected? It made the ring-ring sound and then connected within seconds. You know that operator? Agent? Anyway that mechanical-gold-like voice. That came on.
-Don't remember exactly but I think it said something like 'This is the National Tax Service ARS application reporting center, please select the service you want.'
-Then a weird screen popped up on my smartphone. Red background with white letters, I took a screenshot......
The post had an image file attached by the author.
――――――――――
National Tax Service
National Tax Service
This is the National Tax Service ARS application reporting center.
[1. Comprehensive Income Tax Report]
[2. Value-Added Corpse Tax Report]
[3. Slave Workplace No-Performance Report]
Data charges apply in 3G, LTE environments.
――――――――――
An image file with uneven quality and noise here and there. The combination of red background + white letters stabbed my eyeballs.
At this point, it wasn't just a shaking stone bridge but one doing a tap dance, yet amazingly the verification post author didn't stop.
-Seeing 'Value-Added Corpse Tax' and 'Slave Workplace,' I was honestly a bit creeped out lol. This is the first creep point.
-Clicked 'Comprehensive Income Tax Report,' the most normal-looking one. Anyway, the notice talk also said to report comprehensive income tax.
-When I clicked, noise crackled and the operator voice told me to enter my resident registration number? I almost forgot my own number since it's been so long lol
-It proceeded like actually paying taxes, but at the very end it asked me to pay via account. But fuck, where are there bank accounts in this day and age? Ah, even if there are, banks don't do business, so how am I supposed to send money? lol
-Whether fortunately or unfortunately, they said I can pay directly at the tax office. They told me to go to 'Pocheon Tax Office.'
-This is the second creep point...... I actually live in Pocheon lololol. How do these ghost text fuckers know where I live? lol
-But as far as I know, the tax office in this area collapsed ages ago, so I don't know why they're telling me to go. I'll go check in a bit and post a verification update......
The post ended there.
Naturally, the comment response was explosive in a negative sense.
-Anonymous: You crazy bastard, why would you call that??
-Goryeo-jang: One more going up to God.
-[National Road] Academy: Make sure to post the verification.
-Anonymous: If it's Pocheon, the Awakened there are probably all in the same guild anyway, sounds like his info will get leaked?
-Literature Girl: I can't believe such a brave soul still exists......
-dolLHoUse: Dull.
-[Satisfaction] Cooking Queen: Human life is precious. Desire is fleeting. Aren't there more important things in life than trying to attract others' attention?
└Anonymous: As expected, Cooking Queen is so kind in her wordsㅠㅠ.
-[Baekhwa] 6th Grader: Hoeeh. >_<);;
-Anonymous: I'd bet my entire fortune that this fucking moron is 100% gonna die.
I didn't blame the post author.
Instead, I resolved to use this opportunity.
"Seo-gyu. I'm going to head up to Pocheon for a bit, so watch the house while I'm gone."
"Huh? Pocheon? Why suddenly...... Ah, are you going because of the verification post on SG Net?"
"Yeah. It's a newly appeared nationwide-level bizarre entity, so I need to check it out."
"Wow...... Hyung-nim, you're seriously diligent."
I lightly packed my belongings and immediately headed north. Almost in a strolling mood.
By my standards, Seoul to Pocheon wasn't that far, and Pocheon was also the area where Sim A-ryeon operated as the 'Healing Angel' back in the 50th iteration. It was a familiar neighborhood in many ways.
I arrived in Pocheon in less than a few hours. And while on my way to find the tax office, I encountered a truly unexpected person.
"Huh?"
"Hm?"
A sturdy physique. A short-cropped sports cut. An appearance almost too wholesome for someone living in a post-apocalypse.
A young man who seemed to have transposed the very concept of 'a properly raised youth' into reality intact.
"Ah, um. Sorry. You seem to recognize me, but...... I'm really bad at remembering faces. Where might we have met?"
The young man didn't recognize me. Rather, I even sensed a hint of wariness toward an outsider he hadn't seen in his neighborhood.
However, I was a born social butterfly with [Complete Memory Ability]. Thanks to that, I could recognize most Awakened. Especially in this case, his face was quite familiar.
'It's Lee Ju-ho, isn't it?'
Lee Ju-ho.
During the 50th iteration, a victim whose father was insulted by the 'Goryeo-jang Villain' Sim A-ryeon. Yet he was also a magnanimous person who forgave Sim A-ryeon.
That magnanimous young man stood squarely on the path leading to the Pocheon Tax Office, backpack in tow. A smartphone in his right hand.
Glancing sideways, wasn't the familiar SG Net homepage displayed on the smartphone screen?
'No way.'
Suddenly, a certain realization struck my mind.
'...You were the verification post author?'
I always feel this.
The world is truly small.
Infinite Regressor telling a story