Chapter 103

Episode 103

Thinking it over carefully, that was true. In all his life, Isaac had never desperately tried to make himself look good to others. What had been omitted here was “pretty.” Isaac had never once tried to make himself look pretty to anyone.

Even if one only considered appearances, that was the case. He had been born with rather rough features, and his expression was fierce, so Isaac always tended to start off with negative points from his very first impression. The same went for his attitude. Far from being charming, he was not even an affectionate sort, so ever since he was young he had constantly heard that he was restless and only caused trouble, and when he grew older, that the stone over there would be more entertaining than him.

That was why Isaac liked the army. Of course, the army had its own politics, and things like wretched line-standing took place in secret, but fundamentally, it was meritocratic. If he did the work assigned to him well, and stood out just a little among others, he could be noticed and praised by everyone.

Once he left the military academy and enlisted as an officer, Isaac was able to escape, to some extent, the exhaustion of human relationships. The army was thoroughly governed by obedience to superiors, so he did not have to pay any attention at all to those with a lower rank or standing than himself.

In that sense, Isaac Pinscher was vulnerable in many ways when it came to equal human relationships. Of course, he did have comrades he was fairly close to, but they were only comrades within the organization called the army. He did not have a single civilian friend he had made after entering society.

Yes. That was why Isaac was all the more at a loss. Sasha Grayson was an upper-class woman, the very sort of civilian Isaac had always found extremely difficult to deal with. She was a woman of noble blood, strictly educated and equipped with the manners and refinement to match. If he had been his original self, she was a woman he would never have dared even dream of approaching.

“……Miss Grayson.”

It was rather late to be realizing it now. Isaac could not clearly remember what conversations he had held with her when the two of them were alone. And now, he had no idea what he was supposed to say to her besides a greeting.

Over the past few days, whenever Isaac hesitated and then spoke to her, she came trotting over to him with the pistol he had given her, as if she had been waiting. As if the business he had in seeking her out was obvious. As if there could be nothing else.

In any case, Isaac spent far more time with Sasha over the past few days than before. In the mornings, he taught her how to maintain a firearm, and in the afternoons, they found an empty lot and he taught her, a beginner, marksmanship. At such times, it felt even more absurd that they were together, because time would pass in the blink of an eye. Sasha, as if already used to Isaac behaving more stiffly than usual like a strict drill instructor, followed him quietly without a single complaint.

“……Ma……”

It was the weekend morning, with only a few days left before they were to return. Isaac tried calling to her beyond the dressing screen placed over there, and when she did not answer, he hesitated and muttered.

“……Madam.”

“Yes?”

Just when he had finally managed to say it aloud in relief, thinking she must not be there, Sasha’s round head popped out from the side of the dressing screen and answered. Isaac nearly felt his heart drop.

“My lady. Shall I braid your hair?”

“Just make it neat, please. I’ll be wearing a hat anyway.”

Belatedly turning his back, he was listening to the murmured conversation from over there when Sasha called to him again.

“I’ll be out soon. I’m all done.”

“Yes. Then…… I will be outside.”

Isaac barely managed to answer and left the bedroom. He stood for a long while outside the bedroom door, glaring at the innocent door, then prowled the corridor with an anxious look on his face. Then, when his eyes met those of a servant staring at him in puzzlement, he hurried down to the first floor.

In the main entrance hall, open to the outside, there stood a full-length mirror that only barely reflected his entire figure. Isaac naturally came to a stop in front of it. Then he examined his hair, which he had spent nearly an hour carefully combing.

He had combed plenty of some gel or whatever it was, said to make hair lie neatly, into his hair, and had polished his shoes with more care than usual.

“You look handsome enough without doing all that, Isaac.”

Isaac jumped at the voice from beside him and turned his head. Without realizing it, he turned with every edge raised, his face fierce, but once he confirmed it was Caroline, he bit his lower lip as if embarrassed.

“You might as well have worn a tuxedo too. The Lord will find you very pretty indeed.”

“……Please mind your own business.”

No sooner had he answered sullenly than Caroline’s fan came flying at his back.

“More importantly, must you part your hair like that? Shall I fix it for you?”

“No, thank you. Grandmother, your style is old-fashioned.”

“……You insolent—”

Isaac and Caroline’s scuffle stopped at the sound of the earl coughing as he approached from over there. Isaac turned his head sharply with a stiff face, as if nothing had happened. Caroline looked back and forth between the father and son, who were still painfully awkward—and would probably remain so—and let out a quiet sigh.

“Oh, dear. I did try to get ready quickly, but……”

Sasha appeared with perfect timing.

“……I’m sorry for keeping everyone waiting.”

Looking at the three of them gathered on the first floor as if they had all agreed to do so, Sasha apologized with an awkward expression.

＊＊＊

The chapel of the estate was located outside the main building, past the garden, and a little farther on. She had heard that, in terms of history alone, it was older than the main building. The chapel was a typically old-fashioned building, with walls and floors of stone. It was the place where Sasha and Isaac had held their wedding a week ago.

They entered the interior of the chapel, which still looked somehow desolate, just as it had then. With her arm linked through Isaac’s, Sasha busily looked back and forth between the high, narrow ceiling and the floor from which a chill rose.

The earl and Caroline naturally sat side by side on the frontmost pew. Isaac and Sasha sat side by side on a pew a little behind them. Several servants, including the estate’s butler and housekeeper, took the remaining seats and filled the space.

“Stand.”

At the sound of Caroline’s voice from the front, everyone, including Sasha and Isaac, rose from their seats. The door opened over there, and the bishop, dressed neatly as he had been at the wedding, was walking in.

“May the Lord’s grace be with you all.”

Since she had already done it once at the wedding, it was not particularly difficult. Sasha answered in unison with the others.

“And also with you.”

Once the bishop took his place before the dais, the people sat down again in their respective seats. Sasha opened the Bible, took out a fresh sheet of paper, and laid it over the pages so that it looked as if she were reading the Bible. Then she took out a pen and began writing something on the paper with a soft scratch.

After opening the Bible, the bishop began reciting today’s passage. While the people recited after him, Isaac sat somewhat blankly, looking down only at the unopened Bible before him.

A white finger suddenly appeared from beside him. Sasha reached out and casually opened his Bible for him, flipped through a few pages, and soon found the page containing today’s passage. Then, as if to say, This part, she tapped the sentence with her finger and, as though nothing had happened, devoted herself again to writing something down.

“Today, we will speak of obedience and duty.”

In the end, unable to resist his curiosity, Isaac tilted his head slightly and looked at what she was writing. As if she were the scribe of this chapel, she was summarizing the contents of the service and writing them down in order.

She must be rather devout. Come to think of it, he did not think he had ever particularly discussed religion with her. Quite apart from Isaac’s impression, Sasha continued writing with an utterly dry expression. Because later, she had to send it to Mr. Turner by letter.

“The Lord has given each person their role, and so we must faithfully fulfill that role.”

Isaac now openly rested his chin in his hand and watched what she was writing.

Are you bored?

He had been openly peeking without realizing it, and the moment he read the sentence she had written, Isaac quickly lifted his gaze with a guilty look. His eyes met Sasha’s, as if she had been waiting. He was caught squarely by Sasha’s green eyes, more playful than usual, with no room to escape.

Sasha looked at him with a smiling face, then pushed her paper halfway toward Isaac. Then, with the tip of the pen she was holding, she tapped the corner she had offered to him.

I was just curious

Isaac, looking reluctant, timidly wrote a reply.

And beneath it, he added this as well.

You seem more devout than I expected.

Sasha wrote that after hesitating a little, then, as if something had suddenly occurred to her, continued with this.

You don’t seem to smoke these days?
Unlike before, I can hardly smell tobacco on you

Isaac looked at the words she had written, then hesitated as he wrote beneath them.

I hardly smoke these days.
Did the smell bother you?

When Isaac hesitated, not knowing how to answer, Sasha’s pen wrote the next sentence without hesitation.

Did you perhaps force yourself to quit?

No, not particularly

No, it was not particularly so. Even before Isaac had become aware of these feelings, he had been more concerned than necessary about his own scent. Sasha always smelled nice, while he was not the sort to care about perfume, let alone his own body odor. Once he suddenly realized that fact, he became far too concerned about what scent she might catch from him.

……And so.

Isaac pressed the pen nib against the paper and, for a long while, could not write the next words. Ink spread across the paper. It grew into a large dot, then spread cloudy and blurred until it covered even the nearby letters.

It is not as though I changed myself
because of you in particular

Isaac was flustered, and because he was flustered, he wrote that quickly and defensively.

What I mean is, I think I now have to mind the way I appear as well

Making his worry seem foolish, Sasha smoothly wrote an unconcerned reply beneath his sentence.

The changed hairstyle suits you, too

Then she wrote this.

Isaac’s face flushed hotly, and he covered his jaw with the hand not holding the pen, as if to hide it. Seeing her smile as she looked straight at him, he roughly scrawled beneath it with the pen.

Liar