The love I know is anxious and fearful.
It is something one must constantly strive to protect, and remain on guard all day lest it be taken away. Furthermore, one must constantly refine oneself to be worthy of that love.
The love I experienced was like that, and the love I learned was like that.
'So this is not so much love as a kind of... comfort.'
Comfort that I, exhausted by people, came to possess after discovering my only ally. The desire to lean on someone.
The conclusion I reached after giving up sleep last night was reasonably persuasive.
"You are so beautiful again today!"
Before my attendance at the final banquet, the maids vied to exclaim in admiration.
Perhaps they concluded they needed to accommodate me, as I had not only rested thoroughly yesterday but also lay around refusing to meet anyone until just before the banquet started today.
I nodded appropriately and left the palace, where I met Heinley who had come to meet me as he did on the first day.
The banquet hall was not far, and since we had several things to discuss, we decided to walk as a stroll. Thanks to deliberately wearing comfortable shoes, my feet were at ease.
As we entered the corridor leading to the banquet hall building, Heinley spoke up.
"You rested, but why does your complexion look worse?"
"That can't be right. You must be seeing things wrongly."
As I kept a straight face and looked straight ahead, I could feel him examining me with疑惑 from beside me.
"More importantly, how was yesterday's banquet?"
When I quickly changed the subject, he escorted me and lowered his voice.
"They approached me."
He confirmed that the palace servants were keeping an appropriate distance from us, then added a small question.
"What exactly did you say to them?"
The 'they' Heinley spoke of was Roam. As expected, Roam had tried to approach using the banquet.
Since I did no outdoor activities at all, it was only natural they would use such official occasions.
"I told them I was being confined."
"......They believed that?"
Heinley muttered in an absurd voice. He didn't know Roam's atmosphere, so he could think that. I nodded nonchalantly.
"Otherwise, they wouldn't be able to interpret why I'm staying put in the Imperial Palace like this."
In the first place, Roam didn't know at all about the existence of the key I had come to the Imperial Palace to find, so they would have tried to find other reasons.
They might have figured out that I was trying to bring down Liliana and Maxel somehow.
But they would have assumed my ability only went that far.
"You don't think it's to protect the Imperial Palace?"
"You know they are different in nature from any other vassals. They firmly believe that protecting the Imperial Palace can only be achieved through the close relationship between the Imperial Family and Roam."
"Truly an arrogant notion."
"Yes, that is the reason His Highness must drive them all out."
Heinley had already decided to take down both Maxel and the Emperor, so even if it was difficult, it would be better in the long run to replace them all at this opportunity.
"There are many who have been suppressed while watching for opportunities. So it won't be difficult to fill their vacancies."
Heinley, who had been narrowing his eyes and gauging something internally, glanced at me.
"By the way, really, do you intend to accept the Duke's invitation?"
"Didn't you already agree with my father? To quietly extract me."
Heinley would want the Resurrected One to remain in the Imperial Palace, so why was he helping with the escape?
The question Roam had was answered by Heinley's pure love. The explanation was that Heinley loved me so much he decided to do as I wished.
Well... it wasn't exactly wrong.
"That's something we already planned with you, so I did that."
Heinley, who was hesitating with his lips pressed together at my words, continued carefully.
"......His Majesty is already choosing the wedding date."
"My engagement to His Highness?"
I asked back with a snort of laughter, and Heinley shook his head and answered in a heavy voice.
"Not engagement, but marriage."
His voice seemed to contain the shame he was feeling right now.
'To be working so hard at feigning ignorance. His expression later will be worth seeing.'
I bit my lips tightly to hold back the laughter that was about to burst out.
But then, I ended up recalling yesterday's events. And at the same time, the relaxed smile that had settled on my lips instantly vanished.
I quickly cleared my throat and erased the thoughts in my head.
"Ahem, hem. So you told that to my father?"
"I did hint at it to the Duke yesterday, but I don't know if he'll go against His Majesty as we wish."
Heinley furrowed his brows. He seemed not to trust my father.
"The fact that my father approached His Highness means Roam has finished all their decisions. Roam doesn't move rashly."
All worries and trial and error end within the family. Since I appeared in the Imperial Palace, Roam would have been worrying while watching me, and would have gone through numerous internal meetings.
My father moving meant he had filtered and filtered through dozens of options and reached a single conclusion.
And I was convinced that conclusion was what I intended.
"True, that's Zenon."
At that, Heinley changed the subject.
"......Yes."
"He suddenly wanted permission to use magic today, so I connected him to the Magic Department, but do you know what he's planning to do?"
I turned my gaze away, feeling preemptively guilty, and struggled to keep my voice calmly subdued.
"......I wonder. I have no guess."
Since he came to the separate palace early in the morning, I sent him away without even seeing his face—could that be related?
"If even you don't know, it must be personal business."
Heinley turned his attention away nonchalantly. And I struggled to calm my mind. The banquet hall was getting closer.
"......"
Seeing the noise and bright lights of the banquet hall, I naturally thought of the countless people who would be inside. Thanks to that, I was able to quickly compose my reason.
As I was repeatedly calming myself, Heinley suddenly asked a question as if something had occurred to him.
"By the way, before leaving, you don't plan to destroy Maxel's palace?"
"Do you truly want to destroy it?"
Or was there another intention?
When I only rolled my eyes to glance at Heinley, he answered in a gentle tone.
"There's no reason to lie about it now. It always bothered me. When only the roof flew off, I was so regretful."
His sentiment was the same as mine. However, how should I put it, the emotion reflected in Heinley's eyes looked much more intense than mine.
Well, thanks to that it was funny, but I also wondered if it was something to be this persistent about...
"Roam's matters come first, so when that's finished and there's time, I'll destroy it."
"Thank you. If you just let me know the date in advance, I'll evacuate the palace people myself."
Heinley smiled broadly and thanked me. I looked at him blankly for a moment, then quietly withdrew my gaze.
Men too can be this frightening when they harbor grudges. I should be careful not to incur Heinley's resentment.
'......Did I already incur resentment because of the rejection of the confession?'
I considered asking casually but decided against it. Scratching only makes the wound worse, after all.
* * *
Maxel and Liliana were absent from the banquet. The Emperor tried to dress up the Crown Prince's behavior nicely, but in the end, it was an expression of dissatisfaction toward me.
After being humiliated by Samuel and Zenon on the first day, they must have prepared thoroughly to counterattack on the second day, but since I was absent, their mood seems to have been completely ruined.
It may have been something not agreed upon with the Emperor either, as the Emperor's complexion wasn't that good either as he tried to package their behavior.
Eventually, the Emperor left the banquet early, and the Empress declared she would leave guest reception to Heinley not long after.
As a result, a very good environment was formed for Heinley today as well.
'It's comfortable for me too without Maxel and Liliana.'
Before going to the balcony where I was to meet my father, I danced a couple of times as a matter of courtesy.
Once with my partner Heinley, and once with Samuel.
Then the nobles who had only watched on the first day and couldn't even get a chance on the second day approached me gradually on the third day, but since the performative courtesies were already more than finished, I mercilessly rejected their dance requests.
After that, I scanned the banquet hall while gauging the timing to go to the balcony as naturally as possible.
'Not here?'
Zenon, who I thought would come running to me chirping as soon as I entered the banquet hall, was nowhere to be seen.
'......Did something happen at the Magic Tower?'
Or was there another problem? While thinking about that, I realized at some point that I didn't know much about Zenon.
At most, what I know is that his mother passed away, and he has one older brother who was expelled from the Magic Tower after getting involved in a succession dispute?
What I demanded from him were various miscellaneous tasks needed during travel, and I didn't need to know his private information to order those tasks.
Then going forward......
"Resurrected One."
A servant holding a tray with glasses approached me.
"I've brought the wine you ordered."
I had never ordered wine. So this was a signal from someone.
Looking at the bright red wine sloshing in the transparent glass, I accepted it obediently.
"I need to get some fresh air. If His Highness the First Prince looks for me, tell him yourself."
"Yes, I understand."
As I moved, several people tried to sneak into the balcony following me. However, since I had already asked Samuel for help in advance, he led the priests and blocked their path.
After glancing at the nobles being caught by the priests and subjected to proselytizing, I entered the balcony.
It was the very spot I had entered before to watch the Crown Prince's palace being destroyed.
"You haven't been waiting long, have you? Father."
When I asked calmly, my father who had been standing in the shaded area took a step forward and revealed himself.
Father paused for a moment and slowly looked me over.
"I was told you were confined, so I was quite worried, but I'm glad you look healthy."
Unexpectedly, his first words were a perfectly normal greeting.
I was flustered since I expected the conversation to proceed similarly to mother, but soon I nodded nonchalantly.
"You look healthy too, Father."
"I heard the story from Melonia and was quite surprised."
Bringing up mother's story, my father moved his body to a slightly brighter spot. I expected him to approach ambitiously, but that wasn't exactly the case.
Rather, it felt somewhat dark, which was strange.
"Are you truly homesick?"
"I thought you had already finished all preparations to take me away."
"To the position of Prisian?"
Father narrowed his eyes.
"Do you truly desire that position?"
I almost let out a hollow laugh without meaning to.