Particularly when she danced with Samuel, the dress spreading roundly looked like a flower in full bloom, making it impossible to look away.
If Lilia hadn't spoken to me, I would have been lost in a daze until the dance ended.
Whether she knew Xenon was lost in thought or not, Anelli enthusiastically continued her instruction.
"Here, the woman moves like this. Then you... ah!"
The movement that had been guiding him smoothly went awry for a moment. Anelli's body, which had been standing straight, swayed backward.
"Whoa!"
Xenon pulled strongly on the arm that had been wrapped around her waist. Anelli's center of gravity, which had tilted backward, now tipped forward.
Looking down at her, who was practically falling into his embrace, Xenon asked in a low voice.
"Is this also part of the dance movement?"
"This is... it's because we're on the grass. My shoes were more slippery than I thought."
Anelli replied in an embarrassed voice, clearing her throat and straightening herself. The red flush spreading over her pale nape caught Xenon's eye.
Seeing that, he felt thirsty for some reason.
"Xenon, I'm fine now."
Compared to yesterday, today's Anelli was not at all glamorous.
But she was still beautiful.
Even with her hair loosely tied up, her face without any makeup, and her everyday clothes that were utterly plain compared to yesterday.
It wasn't just because of her appearance. Xenon suddenly realized.
Whether people called her the resurrected one, the second daughter of Roam, the former fiancée of the Crown Prince, the evil woman who was beheaded, the leader of the Dullahans...
Whatever epithet was attached, or none at all, Anelli always looked beautiful in his eyes.
Even the sorrowful resignation that lay thick beneath her cynical and bleak gaze.
"Xenon?"
Anelli looked up in confusion while still in his arms.
Looking into those purple eyes, Xenon finally asked the question he should have asked long ago.
"Why are you teaching me to dance?"
"Hm?"
"Given your usual personality, I don't think you would make this kind of offer to just anyone."
At Xenon's observation, Anelli's eyes grew a bit wider. A faint bewilderment flickered in her slowly blinking eyes.
"Well, because you're the only one who can be my partner when I want to dance?"
Anelli answered in a dazed tone, then frowned and added in a stronger voice.
"You said you'd go wherever I go."
"That was said with ulterior motives."
At Xenon's words, Anelli's expression went blank.
"Actually, coming to the Imperial Palace itself was with ulterior motives."
Looking at Anelli gazing up at him with an unusually innocent face, his heart ached unnecessarily.
No matter how he thought about it, Xenon felt too wronged.
Wasn't Anelli so harsh to Prince Heinry? She, who was merciless even to the imperial family, was behaving so freely with Xenon.
So wasn't it natural that he would develop feelings for her?
'She doesn't even know how much I'm suffering right now.'
Xenon had never in his life had such concerns, nor had he ever thought he would.
Until now, he had vaguely recognized his feelings but hesitated to define them clearly. He was afraid that the special treatment he was receiving now might disappear.
But he could no longer bear it.
"What... ulterior motives?"
"Ungainly thoughts. Lewd, with many desires."
At his direct expression, Anelli was at a loss for words. Looking down at her, Xenon narrowed his eyes and asked quietly.
"You do know all that and are still doing this, right?"
Actually, this was Xenon's hope. Because she treated him specially. This would lead to constant misunderstandings.
So he hoped.
"This is my first unrequited love, so I don't know well, but is this all a misunderstanding?"
Just like himself, who grew fond of her through their interactions, kept looking at her, and ended up giving his heart, he hoped she would feel the same way.
"Knowing and doing this means you're trying to seduce me."
Anelli couldn't even think of pushing Xenon away and just stared blankly up at him. Then she suddenly averted her gaze.
She seemed to have finally found words to reply, barely moving her lips.
"You were the one who started the seducing first."
Her voice was utterly cold, but her visible ear was red. That was so cute that Xenon couldn't take his eyes off her.
Since when did he find this woman cute?
"Don't even think about denying it."
Xenon readily admitted his past efforts to get closer to Anelli, to approach her without burdening her.
"You figured it out."
"Do you think I'm a fool? How many people have liked me? I would recognize that."
Anelli replied quickly in a stiff voice and subtly turned her body. However, Xenon didn't relax his arm, so she couldn't move away at all.
After struggling a couple of times, she stopped moving as if giving up.
"If you don't like it, kick me away."
"What?"
To her, who was looking up at him with absurd eyes, Xenon emphasized in a firm voice.
"Kick me away."
"...Were you always this extreme?"
Looking quietly at Anelli, who wasn't pushing him away strongly or telling him to get away, Xenon tilted his head.
"I honestly can't tell whether you've come over to me or not."
Anelli, who had been quietly moving her lips, took a deep breath. Her face, now calm and composed, was the expression Xenon had always seen.
"I've always been generous with you."
"Now that you mention it, that's true."
A laugh mixed into Xenon's muttered words.
"Why are you so generous?"
"Because you're on my side."
For some reason, Xenon felt like she was about to cry.
Even though there was not a trace of tears, and her voice and expression were completely dry.
"The side of 'me, who is nothing.'"
The whispering voice was very quiet. But there was no difficulty in understanding the words.
Because the two people were close enough to easily touch with just a little movement.
Because he had unknowingly leaned his head that close.
"You like me enough to be lost in my beauty like yesterday."
Actually, it wasn't just yesterday.
Xenon chuckled and pulled her closer.
"Since you're this clever, you must have realized that I have no intention of missing this opportunity."
"Opportunity?"
He felt the tip of their noses touching slightly.
At her startled reaction, his insides boiled.
"Yes, opportunity."
With a low murmur, their lips met.
The skin that touched was soft and hot. He couldn't tell whether the heat he felt was his or Anelli's.
Xenon, who bit her lower lip as if biting into soft ice cream, let out a sigh-like breath.
The lips that had briefly separated now meshed a bit deeper. Even after swallowing the hot breath, the thirst wouldn't subside, making him increasingly persistent.
The noise felt distant. Instead, the rapid breathing and the hands clinging to him occupied all his senses and paralyzed his reason.
It was a kiss so, so sweet that he couldn't breathe.
---
"You're the only one who sees the author as simple-minded."
When Samuel said that, honestly I didn't pay much attention. I just passed it off as him saying that because he and Xenon had a bad relationship.
But now the reason Samuel's words come to mind again is because I've come to fully agree with his words.
Xenon is definitely not simple-minded.
A simple-minded person couldn't behave like that...
[Captain, I didn't see anything.]
It was Bark's loud shout that woke my spirit, which had been sitting there absent-minded.
[I really didn't see anything!]
If he had a head, I would have hit that chattering mouth.
[Shut up, Bark.]
"Thank you for saying what I wanted to say, Minte."
When I calmly praised Minte, Bark squatted in his cage and drooped his shoulders gloomily.
Whether he did that or not, I turned my attention away from him and lay face down on the outdoor table again.
The surface of the table, cooled by the night air, cooled the heat of my flushed cheeks.
It was late at night now, and Xenon had returned to the guest room assigned to him.
'He didn't seem to want to go, though.'
What would I have done if he didn't go? Would he sleep in this detached palace? If he suddenly stayed over like this, what would the palace people say the next day? Definitely strange rumors would...
'...Even if rumors spread... it wouldn't be a complete lie?'
If I hadn't come to my senses at the loud fireworks sound from the banquet hall, I really might have let him stay in the detached palace.
"Ha..."
Since my resurrection, had my mind ever been this empty and my vision this dark? Even when I talked to a squirrel at the temple, even when I first met Nadav and was called captain, it wasn't this bad.
When I unconsciously touched my lips, I felt the slightly swollen skin.
"It's swollen."
Even though he didn't act that weak usually. Xenon, you fraud. If the kiss had been just a little longer, my lips would have burst.
[Blood won't come, Captain.]
"...I didn't ask, Bark."
How does he see such detailed things in this situation? Even though he has no eyes?
[I told you to shut up, Bark.]
[But Minte...]
[Captain, it's late at night, so please rest now.]
Minte, who had coldly ignored Bark, gently urged me.
Even in my opinion, sitting in the night air like this wouldn't sort anything out. Actually, I wasn't even sure what exactly was confusing me.
"This is my first unrequited love, so I don't know well, but is this all a misunderstanding?"
First, the circumstances suggest that Xenon seduced me. I fell for it. The kiss with him wasn't bad. He probably felt the same way?
...So should we just say we both enjoyed it and end it?
'That can't be right.'
What face should I use to see him tomorrow? As if nothing happened? He likes me, so he won't do that.
Then what about me? I'm generous with Xenon, and honestly, I receive great comfort from him.
How should I define this feeling?
"Captain."
"...Yes."
I stood up for now. It was true that the night was too late, and I had a feeling that no answer would come no matter how much I worried.
After sleeping and waking up, I could only hope that my head would regain proper reason.