59.
As my body trembled lightly, unable to hold back my laughter, the duke lifted his head in displeasure.
“Why are you laughing?”
Then he began staring intently into my face.
His face was not blotchy red, but flushed as though color had risen naturally to it, giving him a strange air.
“I’ve been wondering for a while.”
“…….”
“Your Grace. You’re not as old as I thought, are you?”
“What do you mean?”
He furrowed his brow.
“I think you’re about my age……. But for that, the way you talk is a little strange.”
“Why? Is it not dignified?”
That was the first time I’d seen someone evaluate his own manner of speech like that.
When I laughed, he gazed at me with a crooked expression.
“Your Grace. Do you want to be dignified? Refined and all that?”
When I burst into laughter again and again, the duke, for some reason, pressed his lips tightly shut like someone who had been teased.
“Don’t mock me.”
“Ah, I’m not mocking you.”
When I quickly fixed my expression, the duke moved his eyebrows.
Well…….
To others, he must look like some green child still wet behind the ears, occupying one of the three great ducal seats and swaggering about. Was that why he was careful?
I had never imagined the duke would be conscious of how the world viewed him, so I hadn’t noticed.
He had been trying, in his own way, to appear “dignified.”
In the end, my expression collapsed, and I let out a small laugh.
“How should I put it? Your Grace is…….”
It was then.
Because the duke suddenly lifted the hand he had been using to support his weight, the weight I was holding up increased, and I staggered backward.
The windowsill pressed against my waist, and almost at the same time, his hand touched my cheek.
To be precise, his shirt sleeve did.
“…….”
“…….”
He rubbed my cheek with his sleeve, wiping it.
“What are you doing right now?”
His cuff brushed around the corner of my eye.
“Did you cry?”
“…….”
For a moment, I was at a loss for words, then barely managed to shrug and answer.
“I didn’t cry? The corners of my eyes are completely dry right now.”
“Liar.”
“…….”
“There are tear marks here.”
Even drunk, the duke was still the duke.
If there was one difference from when he was sober, it was that he exposed my clumsy lies outright.
“……I’m fine now.”
He rubbed the corner of my eye very, very gently, then whispered in a low voice.
“Still, I want to wipe them for you.”
“Th-thank you, but that’s enough now…….”
Suddenly finding the situation uncomfortable, I placed my hands on the duke’s shoulders and lightly pushed him away.
He was pushed back obediently.
“Was I heavy? I’m sorry.”
“…….”
The duke when drunk was truly, how should I put it…….
Strange.
“Your Grace, you’re drunk.”
“I’m not drunk.”
After sleeping for a while, he should have sobered up at least somewhat.
I, too, felt as if my tipsiness would not fade easily.
Perhaps it was because of the man before me, who had been giving off a sweet scent of alcohol the entire time…….
“First, sit down on the floor.”
The duke obediently sat with his back against the wall beneath the window.
I crouched down beside him as well.
With my knees drawn up and half embraced, I lifted my head and leaned against the wall.
When I reached out, the curtains, swaying softly in the wind, tickled my fingertips.
The duke, who had been staring at them, followed my lead and stretched his hand forward too.
The edge of the curtain that had brushed past my hand lightly touched his fingertips, then withdrew.
His hand, set beside mine, looked especially long and large.
Its color was a little dark too, as if tanned by the sun.
With thick knuckles protruding here and there, his hand looked somewhat indifferent, just like its owner.
Against the backdrop of the pouring moonlight, the shadows of our two hands stretched long across the carpet.
“But why did you really come looking for me? To give me my shoes?”
“…….”
Since he seemed rather honest now that he was drunk, I asked, but as expected, the duke gave no answer.
Softly.
His head slid down onto my shoulder.
When I glanced down, his half-closed eyelashes were faintly gleaming.
If one looked closely, there were surprisingly delicate aspects to his appearance.
“Do you like……?”
For a moment, I was so startled my heart nearly sank.
When I immediately realized it had been “Do you like?” and not “I like you,” my face grew subtly hot.
It was a relief we were not facing each other.
“Wh-what do I like?”
“Frien Izanar.”
“…….”
Ah, right.
He, too, had been one of the people who drank the love potion…….
It was understandable for something like that to bother him.
“Why bring that up all of a sudden?”
“You were dancing.”
“Ah, you saw?”
Leaning on my shoulder, he nodded.
“Back then, I…… didn’t see you, Your Grace. You should have said hello.”
“…….”
“What did you say?”
His voice, which had lowered, became clear again.
“I can’t.”
“Pardon?”
“Dance…… I can’t dance.”
This time, I truly tried hard not to laugh.
To be precise, I tried with my whole body not to let the duke realize I was laughing.
“So you, um, can’t dance.”
Irrepressible laughter had seeped into my voice, but fortunately, he did not seem to notice.
“Is that why you couldn’t say hello?”
Nod.
The duke nodded again.
“I also…… wanted to dance with you.”
Muttering like that.
‘When he says it looking that dejected, I guess there’s no helping it.’
I planted my hands on the floor and clambered up.
“Then we can dance now.”
The floor and ceiling were still spinning round and round, but somehow, I felt like I could do it.
The duke raised his chin and looked up at me.
On his face, which had shown a faint dissatisfaction like someone who had lost a comfortable pillow to rest his head on, a hazy joy soon spread.
He rose. I draped the duke’s arm over my shoulder as one of his shoulders still kept sagging, shifting his center of gravity that way.
On the other side, we clasped hands.
Although outside air was clearly flowing in through the wide-open window, I had the illusion that the warmth lingering in the cramped attic was growing hotter and hotter.
It felt as though my palm would start sweating.
When I listened closely, I could hear a faint dance tune.
“One, two, three, four…….”
I counted the beat aloud.
He hesitated, then turned in a circle as he followed me.
The two of us staggered along, barely keeping our hands clasped.
The beat I counted with my mouth and my body went their separate ways.
‘Huh? Why?’
And it was not only the duke.
My body, too, was not moving the way I wanted.
We creaked like marionettes, and it was so bizarre that somehow it seemed less like dancing than performing a ritual.
“Mm, again! Three, two…….”
As my expression grew more complicated by the second, the duke stared fixedly at nothing but my face.
He didn’t seem to care in the slightest how utterly terrible his own movements were.
Well, if a drunk person were capable of judging that, they wouldn’t be drunk.
And then, in the end.
“Ugh!”
“…….”
Our heads collided.
Hard enough to make my skull ring.
It was because our footwork had gotten tangled.
Though it had only been for a very short while, I stepped back, utterly exhausted.
“Why?”
His head must have been ringing too, but the duke asked calmly, lifting his forehead, where a red mark had appeared.
The way he reached out to catch my hand again after I had pulled away made it seem like he wanted to keep dancing.
I quickly took a step back.
“Dancing really won’t do.”
“……Why?”
“Because I don’t want to knock my head again.”
“……I asked you to dance with me.”
The duke let his arms fall.
Since I had said what I’d said, I felt awkward, and then I suddenly became aware of a fragrance tickling the tip of my nose.
Beyond the railing outside the window, a tree branch stretched close by.
I went closer and reached out.
Among the thick leaves, amid the rounded flower buds, I saw one flower that had bloomed wide open all on its own.
I plucked the flower and turned back.
Then I took the duke’s hand, which seemed dejected, and placed the flower on his palm.
“What does it mean?”
he asked quietly.
What did it mean? Was he asking what he was supposed to do with it?
I shrugged.
“You could tuck it into your breast pocket as decoration… or dry it and use it as a bookmark.”
“…….”
“Hmm.”
Having just thought of something amusing, I smiled brightly.
I picked the flower back up and lifted myself slightly onto my toes.
After tucking the flower beside his ear, I clapped my hands once and laughed.
It suited him far better than I had vaguely imagined.
The vivid red petals, as if they had been dyed into his hair, sat there neatly, revealing their delicate stamens.
“Pretty.”
When I smiled, the duke slowly smiled as well.
“I’m pretty?”
“Ah, no, I mean the flower is….”
“Thank you.”
“…….”
I was at a loss for words.
Did I… not really need to fix that?
The duke seemed to be in a good mood too.
Seizing the chance, I quickly said,
“Let’s dance another time. Definitely, another time.”
“All right.”
The duke answered, then nodded a couple of times.
It was the first time I had seen him add such a gesture.
Usually, the duke’s movements had no excess to them, so he always seemed rather still.
That was why the sight of him now felt unfamiliar, as if he had become a completely different person, and yet….
He looked comfortable.
The duke felt around beside his ear, then brought the flower before his eyes and examined it.
“Do you like this?”
It was an exceptionally gentle smile.
I nodded.
“I’m glad.”
“Um, Your Grace.”
“My name.”
“Pardon?”
“Call me by my name.”
I creakily lifted my head.
What did he just say?
“Pardon? That’s a bit….”
“Why not? You call other people by their names just fine.”
……Now that I thought about it, that did seem to be true. Was there any reason I couldn’t?
“My name.”
He urged me, almost as if he were pestering me.
“Uh…….”
“Isitan.”
“Isi…tan.”
“Yes.”
He smiled as if I had done well.
Isitan Gladinaire.
It was the first day I said his name aloud.