Episode 107
There was no way to explain. Even if she borrowed someone else’s mouth to explain the circumstances, she had no confidence in convincing her parents. The series of events that had swept in like a storm, beginning with the New Year’s execution grounds, had left even Rijan deeply shaken.
At the moment, the very arms wrapped around her were an obstacle.
Rijan attempted to quietly slip out of Ezekiel’s embrace. However, Ezekiel did not let her go. As if she were a puppy that would bolt the moment he looked away, he firmly guarded her, preventing her from straying beyond a certain distance.
“Does it hurt anywhere? *Cough*, you’re not hurt, are you?”
“Your neck, how did your neck...? Huh?”
With a great distance between them that they could not bridge even by stretching out their hands, Rijan’s parents anxiously searched their daughter’s face. She had been dragged to a detention camp on charges of injuring Major Ezekiel Valdemara and must have suffered greatly; they scrutinized her obsessively, over and over, to see if her health had suffered, if she had been hurt anywhere.
“Everywhere else is fine, *cough*, you’re fine, right?”
Rijan was newly grateful for the splendid clothes she wore. Thanks to the thick coat and the shadow of her hat, which appropriately concealed her gaunt figure and pallor, she looked somewhat better than her father and mother, who showed clear signs of grave illness.
Rijan shook her head. It was meant to tell them not to worry, but unable to offer even a brief reply, conveying her meaning only with a gesture—her parents’ expressions gradually clouded at their daughter’s behavior.
“What about treatment?”
“Have you... received any treatment?”
If only Ezekiel weren’t standing right behind her, she would have told a well-meaning lie. But with a man who knew full well that she hadn’t even received a diagnosis, let alone treatment, watching her intently, she froze up prematurely.
As Rijan stood frozen stiff, Ezekiel opened his mouth in her stead.
“As promised, I will provide every possible support, so there will be no need to worry.”
At his answer, her parents’ faces turned desperate as they began to sob.
“Our daughter, please…….”
“She’s a child who only ever studied... *cough*... who knows nothing of anything else……. If a child like that becomes unable to speak…….”
Though anyone could see that the critically ill ones were themselves, Rijan’s parents did not say a single word about their own illness. They only pleaded for help so that their daughter might recover. And to Ezekiel’s firm promise that he would spare no support, they repeated “Thank you, thank you” like parrots for some time.
“Our daughter didn’t do that…… because she wanted to. She met bad parents; it’s because her unlearned father and mother committed a sin…….”
“We were wrong. We truly, truly were wrong.”
To Ezekiel—who had once been the grim reaper holding the power of life and death over their entire family, and was now their only lifeline—Rijan’s parents apologized until their lips wore thin.
Unlike when he looked at Rijan, Ezekiel fixed her parents with a cold, piercing gaze.
The cause of this long tragedy that Rijan had been forced to endure was none other than her parents. They had laid hands on the Valdemara fortune under the pretense of supporting their daughter who was attending Milena Girls’ School, only to be caught by Akenaus, and Ezekiel had now completely grasped the full story of how Rijan, upon receiving news like a bolt from the blue, had been forced to rush here to save her family.
Because her family had caused trouble while trying to support her studies, Rijan must have been unable to properly resent or turn away from them, instead resolving to bear the blame in their stead.
“You should apologize to Rijan first. Everyone in this room has had their lives saved by Rijan.”
He had no intention of forgiving people who had committed wrongdoing so easily and dragged an innocent daughter into the quagmire. He was only letting the matter drop without pressing them further because they were Rijan’s family.
After all, it was true that this couple had raised their only daughter with devoted care, cherishing her beyond their means. They were foolish, pitiful people who had tried to do anything for Rijan and ended up making the wrong choice.
How much better it would have been if he had met Rijan so much earlier.
The ending had wound its way back through so many twists and turns that he sometimes indulged in futile imagination. If her parents had occasionally brought Rijan to the Valdemara mansion, the presence of a young girl would have been quite noticeable in this estate devoid of girls. A doll-like child speaking, walking, or laughing—there was no way it would not have drawn the eye. Even though he had grown up hearing that he was mature for his age, Ezekiel had also been a boy with much he did not know and much he was curious about. He had never even had a younger sibling, and moreover, girls were an even more unfamiliar existence, so he would surely have cast discreet glances at her with a sense of wonder as he passed by.
And if, after a few years, he had casually asked after the girl he had seen in his childhood and heard that she was struggling financially, lacking tuition money, he would have gladly sponsored the young girl’s studies.
Then Rijan would have graduated from school without any problems and returned earlier to Kleris where her family lived. Given her personality, she would have come to offer her thanks to Ezekiel as soon as she finished her studies, and he would have been slightly surprised that the beautiful girl he had sponsored had already grown into an adult…….
...and would have fallen in love as a matter of course.
For there is no cause for doubt in loving someone so lovable.
It was an imagination that could truly have come to pass, so his heart ached bitterly. How wonderful it would have been to reach an ending where no one was hurt.
Except for Ezekiel, everyone was ill, so the visit ended quickly. It took no small toll on the patients to ache at each other’s unhealthy appearances and suppress their surging emotions as much as possible. Rijan, who had not opened her lips and had merely leaned against Ezekiel while listening to her parents’ pleas and worries, also tired quickly.
Drained of strength, her body instinctively sought a comfortable posture. Having blankly leaned against the sturdy back supporting her, Rijan discovered that she had completely entrusted her weight to Ezekiel and started in surprise, trying to straighten her posture. However, instead of letting her go, Ezekiel pulled her waist in deeper and gladly received the weight leaning against him.
Up until the moment he had stepped into this room, Ezekiel had planned to first have Rijan meet her parents and then have a servant bring a chair for her to sit on. However, as he held her tightly to prevent her from getting too close to her family, the sensation of her in his embrace was so welcome that he had completely forgotten.
To be more honest, he had wanted to forget. He had wanted to continue living like this, supporting Rijan’s exhausted mind and body in her stead.
But even this seemed to be a burden on Rijan’s current strength. As soon as Ezekiel noticed her haggard look, he rose to leave.
“Let’s stop here for today.”
Rijan looked at the clock. Only about thirty minutes had passed since they entered the room. It was an incredibly short meeting compared to the time she had waited, but she had no confidence that she could continue listening to her parents’ tears and apologies while their illness was still so evident, so she accepted his decision.
Led by Ezekiel’s hand, she stumbled out of the room, continually looking back. A perceptive servant waited with the door left wide open so that Rijan could see her parents until the very end, and only when the two had disappeared down the far end of the corridor did he finally close the door.
“You felt the same, but the doctor had also judged that letting your parents meet you would likely show more improvement for them as well.”
Ezekiel did not forcibly hurry Rijan’s footsteps, which dragged with heavy reluctance.
“So you can just come again next time.”
Only then did Rijan lift her feet and walk.
Ezekiel observed the heavy garments pressing down on her gaunt shoulders. The thick coat was as heavy as it was warm. It was a weight that would pose no problem for a healthy person, but Rijan was not healthy. Moreover, returning from the isolated annex to the main building’s bedroom would require a long walk.
“I’ll take you to the bedroom. My steps are much faster than yours.”
He added naturally.
“You need to rest quickly to recover quickly, so you can come again.”
With an excuse she could not refuse, Ezekiel lifted her into his arms.
Rijan reflexively clutched the brim of her hat. The wide brim grazed her cheek lightly. It did not hurt, but it was somewhat cumbersome, so Rijan had to take off the hat and hold it in her arms.
Ezekiel tilted Rijan’s round crown—which swayed as if it might or might not touch his chest—toward himself. She was trying to maintain an uncomfortable gap between them, as if there were a very thin wall.
Some distances are farther than they appear. This gap, not even the length of a single knuckle, was bewilderingly bleak and vast to Ezekiel.
The moment it was freed from the hat, Rijan’s chestnut hair poured down like waves. Each time the side of her head—desperately wanting to maintain some distance—tapped against his chest, her long hair fluttered softly and tickled the back of his hand. It was the only part of her body that touched him first without resistance.
“Rijan, I always wanted to hold you like this and walk.”
On the days when he had wandered in darkness, clutching the rope and fumbling along the walking path “Rose” had made for him, he had thought such thoughts in secret. Today he walked the path she guided him along, hiding behind Rose while she looked out for him, but later, he had resolved, he would walk while holding Rose in his arms or carrying her on his back.
So the wind could not carelessly claw at her.
So her feet would not get soaked in muddy water.
“A tiny hand no bigger than a handful grasped me and led the way, bravely cutting through the darkness. I was so grateful, yet so sorry. If a dangerous and rugged path ever appeared, I wanted to carry you so that your feet wouldn’t have to touch it.”
Ezekiel let out a bitter, self-mocking laugh.
“The one who ended up hurting you the most was me, after all.”