“Have you ever worked at a haunted house, or done anything similar?”
Sure enough, the question about experience came up.
But don’t worry. My life had been filled with all sorts of experiences......
“W-well, I’ve frightened students during courage training.”
It wasn’t a lie. In the old days, yangban who had not yet held office were also addressed as students.
Once upon a time, when tigers knew nothing of tobacco, even my great-grandfather (70) was recorded as ‘student.’ That’s how it was written.
Moreover, I had tasted plenty of scholar-officials on their way to Hanyang to take the civil service exam, so I did indeed possess experience in [courage training (life not guaranteed)].
Even so, the interviewer looked me up and down with a suspicious gaze, as if examining prey.
“Working at a haunted house requires staying in dark, eerie places for long periods. It can be a bit taxing mentally, but........”
“That’s exactly why I applied! I prefer dark places to sunlight.”
“Hmm......”
In the dark, humans change from predator to prey, and feel primal fear.
If humans are the prey, then who is the predator......!
Me, of course! I speak of the mighty beings who conceal themselves within yin energy.
To me, a dark and eerie place is no different from my own domain.
I had only answered honestly, yet the interviewer was looking at me with an expression that said he was witnessing a complete madman.
“Are you the type to follow rules well?”
“Yes.....?”
“The haunted house is dark, so it’s a place where accidents happen in large numbers. The previous employee also failed to follow the rules and suffered an unfortunate accident.”
“Yes! I absolutely never forget and always follow the rules.”
“Then that’s a relief. Please be aware that all responsibility for accidents caused by not following the rules lies with you, and report for work at Rutdae World starting tomorrow.”
“Does this mean I’ve passed....?”
“Yes.”
At that single word from the interviewer, I almost let out a cry of joy, but I held it in and left the interview room.
Convenience store part-timer at night. Haunted house part-timer in the morning.
Even wandering ghosts attach themselves to mukbang YouTubers and live comfortably...... and here I am, a phantom beast, what kind of suffering is this....
It was now four in the morning, the hour of the Tiger (In-si). I tackled the backlog of dishes, cleaning, and other household chores.
There was a reason I insisted on doing this at this hour.
Just then, the sensor-activated fluorescent light at the entrance turned on by itself.
Another one showed up.
“Hey, you. Yeah, you, I’m talking to you. You came in through the front door—did you think I wouldn’t know?”
It shuffled hesitantly toward me.
“Sweep from here to there, and finish cleaning the bathroom.”
It made that peculiar expression of its—one of injustice and grievance.
But so what?
There were already about three more of them in similar straits in my house.
One was folding laundry, and another was cooking the soup and rice for tomorrow.
I had assigned them division of labor according to what they had been good at in life, so they would achieve maximum efficiency.
“If you’ve figured out the situation, get started.”
“What? The Underworld Bureau doesn’t allow this? But it’s fine to barge into someone else’s house? Should we go before King Yama right now and get a ruling? You’ll get ten years added to your reincarnation cycle. I’ll probably get away with pulling mugwort and garlic for a day.”
In the end, it grabbed a broom and dustpan and began cleaning the floor of the studio apartment.
Using them—that is, lesser ghosts—to do housework was a popular method among phantom beasts who had settled in the human world and among famous ghosts.
Between three and five in the morning, the yin energy is at its thickest, and even the Underworld Bureau cannot crack down on lesser ghosts, so they begin their autonomous actions.
At this time, one can handle chores through a very rational method: overpowering the lesser ghosts who enter the house and forcing them to do housework.
As that lesser ghost said, the Underworld Bureau doesn’t permit it, but so what if they don’t?
At this hour, the Underworld Bureau can’t even control the lesser ghosts, yet I’m taking the trouble to control them myself—they should be thanking me!
There is an unspoken rule to only use them for one month, to prevent the lesser ghosts from becoming earthbound spirits.
If they became earthbound spirits, the punishment would be far more severe than a day of pulling mugwort and garlic.
When the sun rose, I ate the rice, soup, and side dishes prepared by the lesser ghosts and got ready for my first day of work.
Lesser ghosts can only interfere with the mortal world when the sun is absent, so they wouldn’t be able to see me now.
It was such a flawless method that I truly thought whoever devised it must have been at least the equal of Zhuge Liang.
Rutdae World was an amusement park about thirty minutes away by subway.
The sound of loud music and the clamor of people’s conversations flooded my ears and made my head spin.
As someone who hated noise, I wanted to enter the haunted house immediately.
“First, grab a flashlight as per the rules......”
I tried to grab the employee flashlight according to the rulebook on my smartphone, but I felt something strange.
The flashlight was emanating yang energy far beyond the ordinary.
Assuming that the things which can naturally generate yang energy are the sun, fire, and the body heat of living creatures, an electric flashlight should not be capable of possessing this level of yang energy.
Lesser ghosts would naturally avoid it, and it was enough yang energy to make even me, a phantom beast, feel discomfort.
I picked up the flashlight and examined it from all angles.
“No matter how I look at it, it’s just an ordinary flashlight.......”
Rule number one was to carry a flashlight, and rule number two was a rule saying not to disassemble it, so......
*Click, click, snap.*
Ignoring rule number two completely, I disassembled the flashlight and found a fingernail-sized talisman stuck inside.
“Right, as expected.”
I peeled off the talisman, blew on it, and sent it flying somewhere.
Only now could I carry this flashlight.
My duties were to act as a safety inspector checking the interior before the haunted house opened, and also to dress up as a ghost to scare the guests.
For reference, I was the only one inside the haunted house; there were no other employees.
As expected, it being a haunted house, the interior was saturated with yin energy. Probably about twice as much as at 4:44 in the morning.
The reason they had placed a talisman inside the flashlight was probably to protect the staff from this yin energy.
Unless a human possessed the mental fortitude of a Dao immortal, working long hours in such an environment would grind away their mental strength in real time.
“You, go check if that room over there is clear. You, go sweep up the dust over there.”
The lesser ghosts, who shouldn’t be able to see me during the day, could see me here thanks to the yin energy.
And just like making them do housework, I could make them do my job.
“[*Bzzt!* This is the Haunted House. Inspection is complete.]”
I sent the signal that inspection was complete over the walkie-talkie used by the staff.
I had finished a whopping twenty minutes earlier than the allotted time, so it should be fine to slack off a bit until work hours officially began.
Looking for a place to rest, I happened to find an empty chair.
To be precise, it wasn’t empty—several lesser ghosts were stacked on top of each other sitting in that spot, but......
“Get up.”
At my single command, the lesser ghosts scrambled up from the chair and scattered.
As soon as my rear touched the chair, I remembered the sixth rule.
[Do not sit in any chair inside the Haunted House. Sitting in a chair already claimed by someone is rude behavior.]
Since the ones who had claimed it first had vacated the spot for me, it was a rule that didn’t apply.
For twenty minutes, I had the lesser ghosts hold my smartphone while I watched videos.
While doing so, a thought suddenly struck me.
Did I really have to dress up as a ghost myself?
The answer was NO!
There were so many real ghosts here; there was absolutely no need for me to dress up as one.
“Here, take this.”
I gave a strand of my hair to a female ghost with long, disheveled hair.
If a lesser ghost possessed a strand of my hair, it would become visible to humans.
In other words, this thing had become my substitute to do my job.
“If a person comes this way, go ‘Hehehe!’ and chase them a little. Got it?”
The lesser ghost shook her head.
“You can’t? Why?”
The lesser ghost opened and closed her mouth like a goldfish.
“You can’t talk. Got it. I’ll provide the laughter for you. You just chase them.”
*Nod.*
Finally, the Haunted House opened for business.
From the sound of footsteps, it seemed the first guest was.......
*Kyaaaaah!!*
Along with a scream, the guest’s footsteps faded away.
They had fled back toward the entrance without reaching this far, even though it wasn’t very distant.
The ghost who had been preparing to chase the guest drooped like a disappointed puppy.
“This guest must have been a scaredy-cat. The next one will make it here.”
The ghost clenched both fists tightly at my words and showed motivation.
But the next...... the next guest also failed to reach this far.
The ghost was already curled up in a corner of the room like a pill bug, lost in despair.
“Honey! Where are you?! That’s strange, you definitely went this way......?”
At that moment, a man’s voice was heard from outside.
It seemed he was looking for his lover who had gotten separated inside the Haunted House. If only I could lure him here......!
I cleared my throat and prepared to do a voice impression.