# 135
135. Met the Count Again (4)
Vincent, who had briefly fallen asleep, woke up as Robert and the nanny returned. Robert, who had been out for a walk until well past lunchtime, looked quite pleased, his face bright and relaxed.
As soon as he entered the room, Robert rushed over to Vincent, while the nanny apologized to me, seeing that I had just finished cleaning. I told her it was fine—I had only done some light cleaning since there was nothing else to do anyway, and she must have had a harder time looking after Robert. I reassured her gently.
Vincent had a late lunch with Robert. He must have been truly idle, playing with Robert until even sharing dinner before leaving the mansion.
Before departing, he didn't forget to give me a reminder.
"I'll come again tomorrow."
True to his word, Vincent visited the mansion again the next day. It was a bit later than the previous day, but he faithfully spent the day at the forest mansion once more. And the day after that, and the day after that too, Vincent came by without fail. On the surface, it looked like he came to see Robert, but in reality, his purpose was clearly to keep an eye on me. Otherwise, there was no way we would run into each other every time he visited.
Perhaps the reason this otherwise ordinary daily life felt remarkably new was because the relationship between him and me had changed. Fortunately, since I was attending to Robert, meeting him wasn't strange.
What puzzled me, however, was that ever since he figured out who I was, his attitude toward me had become warmer and somehow subtle.
Since I was attending to Robert, the nanny and I took turns having rest periods. Today, the nanny rested first in the morning, and I had my break in the afternoon.
I went down to the first floor and headed toward the end of the corridor. It was a dead-end space where hardly anyone came, so I often used it during my breaks.
I was sitting against the wall, staring blankly out the window, when suddenly urgent footsteps broke the silence, growing closer and closer. Soon, someone jumped out from around the corner.
The intruder, breathing slightly rough as if from running, was Vincent.
"Why are you here."
"Why are you here."
Vincent snatched the very words I was about to say. Seeing his somehow angry face left me flustered.
"It's my rest time, so I was taking a break."
"In a place like this?"
"Yes. Not many people come here, so it's a good place to rest."
When I gave him a look asking if that was so strange, Vincent glanced around, let out a deep sigh, and swept a hand over his face. His exhausted face disappeared behind his hand and reappeared looking normal again.
Without giving me a chance to stop him, Vincent walked over to my side and plopped down on the floor.
"You can't just sit like this."
I called out urgently, but Vincent casually leaned his head against the wall with an unconcerned face. He closed his eyes and didn't even respond to my words. I took off my apron to lay on the floor for him, but seeing that he had no intention of getting up, I just lowered my hands.
Come to think of it, his hair was slightly disheveled, and his breathing was still rough.
"Did you perhaps come looking for me?"
"I went to Robert's room and you weren't there."
True, whenever he visited over the past few days, I had been in Robert's room. But I wasn't always with Robert. Sometimes I helped the nanny with her work, and sometimes I spent my break alone like this. It wasn't a big deal, yet he acted like someone who had been thoroughly startled.
"If anyone saw, they'd think I was a lost child."
"You're worse than a child. You never know where you'll dart off to."
"What did I do? That's too much."
I had only tried to rest, but he treated it as if I had committed some tremendous act, so I felt a bit wronged. I argued back, but it didn't sink in at all. It seemed that my attempt to flee before our reunion was coming back to bite me. Given what I had done, I couldn't say anything, but his attitude was a bit excessive.
Vincent had asked me to stay by his side. But I still couldn't answer those words.
Now my life was no longer in danger, and even if such a situation arose, I knew he would protect me. But remaining here was a different matter. Truthfully, I didn't understand why I should be by his side.
Simply because of our past connection? Because of a promise we made? He didn't seem like someone who would cling to such things. If he was trying to keep the promise he made out of pride, then now that we'd reunited and cleared up the misunderstanding, wasn't that enough? At least the Vincent I knew would have thought so.
I couldn't understand this attitude of his. Not just the overly warm way he treated me, but especially the way he came looking for me like this.
"Honestly, I don't understand why you're acting like this."
"About what?"
"Your attitude toward me, Master."
"Does there have to be a reason?"
Of course, not everything needed a clear reason. Sometimes there were things that couldn't be explained. But that wasn't the case between him and me. It was stranger that there was no 'reason' between us. Just as I had been sold for gold coins and brought to this mansion, there must be a reason he wanted to keep me by his side.
"I'm curious."
"Because it seems like you could leave at any time if you set your mind to it."
"That's not what I'm asking."
I didn't want to ask why he came looking for me, but why he wanted to keep me by his side.
Vincent was silent for a moment. As his rough breathing gradually steadied, he opened his eyes and looked at me. His face, gazing at me steadily, was somehow subtle.
"Didn't I tell you last time? If you want to hear the answer to your curiosity, you need to answer my question honestly first."
"What should I tell you?"
Perhaps it was the somewhat heavy atmosphere, or perhaps it was because of his attitude of always answering my questions honestly. I thought that now, I could accommodate his words a little. If this had been a few days ago, I would have chosen my words carefully to hide my identity, but there was no need for that anymore.
"Did you really not know this was the Belunita family's estate and who I was? Were you planning to hide your identity and pretend not to know me until you left here?"
As expected, it wasn't a light question. I hesitated for a moment before parting my lips.
"I didn't know this was the Belunita family's estate. I was told I'd be sent to a different family's household, and the carriage that brought me here had no windows, so I couldn't see the way. With the surroundings entirely forest, it was difficult to pinpoint the exact location, and entry into the woods was restricted as well. The day I first saw you in this mansion, I realized where this was. And even knowing, I pretended not to know and hid my identity. It's also true that I intended to leave. To be precise, it would be more accurate to say I hid because I would leave someday."
"Why did you hide it?"
"I told you. ……Because I thought you'd be disappointed."
The last words were mumbled quietly. But Vincent somehow caught them and made a displeased face. I bowed my head and fidgeted with both hands.
After watching me like that for a moment, Vincent spoke again.
"You seem different from what I thought."
"I knew you'd be disappointed."
At the reproachful words, I smiled bitterly.
"I said it before—I was surprised, but I've never been disappointed."
"It's okay. I would have been disappointed too. Looking like this."
Yes, looking this ugly. I would give charity even to a beggar I happened to meet on the street. He told me that faces didn't matter, but maybe he had lied to spare me from getting hurt.
"Is self-deprecation your hobby?"
"You can be honest with me. I'm fine."
"What do you mean you're fine? You're going to cry."
"I won't cry."
I shook my head as if refuting his words. I won't cry over something like this anymore. When I was young, I cried because it was hard being compared to pretty Alicia and facing inexplicable contempt, but not anymore.
"I truly wasn't disappointed."
"Why?"
"Should I have been?"
I didn't know how to respond to the counter-question. Everyone had been disappointed when they saw my face, so I thought that was normal. So I couldn't honestly believe his words that he wasn't disappointed.
"Were you disappointed in me?"
"What?"
"You know the reason I could see again. That's why you're not asking, right?"
My heart churned like a lake with ripples from a thrown stone. Only after hearing his words did I realize I hadn't asked the question I should have been most curious about since reuniting with him. I didn't ask because I had already heard it from Ethan, but from his perspective, it must have seemed strange.
"Aren't you disappointed in me, who sacrificed my friend's younger sister?"
"Don't say such things!"
I argued strongly and raised my head. Both hands, tightly gripping my skirt, trembled. I didn't want him to think like that. It wasn't a matter of judging who was more at fault.
Vincent faced me without showing any expression. His face, revealing neither pain nor suffering, hurt even more.
"I'm not disappointed. Because I know that neither the one who made that choice nor the one who had to accept it did so with a light heart. Even if you thought differently, that choice must have been painful for both of you."
"Do you really think so?"
The question seemed somehow cautious.
For a moment, we faced each other without words. The silence was heavy, and even the warm sunlight streaming down felt cool. Emotions that couldn't be easily expressed seemed to flow mixed in the air that had grown sharp. Somehow, I felt as if Lucas might be watching us from somewhere.
"Yes."
Even so, I answered with a firm voice. I, who had left this place at an important moment, couldn't comfort him, but at least for this moment, I wanted to be honest.
For an instant, his eyes seemed to waver before he turned his head away. Vincent leaned his back against the wall again and fixed his gaze beyond the window.
"When my parents suddenly passed away in an accident, I was secretly very confused. I wasn't ready to lead the family yet, and around me, there swarmed people trying to seduce me to fulfill their greed. People who had been on good terms until yesterday revealed their true motives overnight."
"……"
"There are many who seem respectable on the outside but stab you in the back. So appearances don't matter to me."
Ethan had said something similar.
"Just as you weren't disappointed in me, I've truly never been disappointed in you either. I mean it."
"……"
But…. I hesitated and inwardly refuted his words. It wasn't that I couldn't believe him, but a bad thought kept circling in one corner of my mind. However, I didn't voice it. I hadn't shown any good sides so far, and I was afraid of looking even worse for no reason.
I glanced away and looked out the window, shrinking into myself. Vincent must have noticed I was trying to change the subject, but he didn't react particularly.
"I'm tired."
Suddenly, a heavy weight settled on my shoulder. Vincent leaned his head on my shoulder. Despite it being an uncomfortable posture with him bending far to the side, he didn't seem to care. He rubbed his face against my shoulder as if trying to find a comfortable position.
I raised my shoulder a little more so he could lean comfortably. Because of that, I had no choice but to stiffen my body awkwardly.
"Did you find out who made those servants do that?"
"No, I'm still looking."
Since it wasn't a simple matter, there must be many things to attend to openly and secretly. Fatigue seeped through his low sigh.
After that, as if promised, the conversation stopped. He leaned against me with his eyes closed, and I only gazed out the window. The afternoon sunlight wrapped around the surroundings again with a cozy warmth. Hazy dust drifted faintly in the rays of light.
Long fingers slipped between my fingers resting on the floor. It was a body temperature hotter than the afternoon sunlight. The wind blowing from somewhere, the silence, the time that tickled as it approached. I couldn't grasp the hand that reached for me, and instead pretended not to notice, only staring out the window.
Could this be simply called the relationship between a master and a servant?
How should I define our relationship now? That, too, was something I couldn't know at this moment.