EP.263 Half Confession
The prophet's destiny is disbelief.
Myth, legend, fairy tale. In every tradition passed down, prophecies are never heeded. When warned to avoid danger, people cling to it like a magnet; when advised to follow revelation, they scoff and trample it.
Ziekrund, convinced that I was a prophet, planted distrust toward my friends.
"Look. Huey, who sees through the Six-Star General's strategies and disguises in an instant—why couldn't he prevent the tragedy of Hamelin? With his abilities and knowledge, he should have noticed Nicholas's plans in advance."
"Sophistry—!"
"In the first place. The reason Nicholas tried to commit a taboo? It was because Huey lacked talent compared to his qualities. The person who was most active when Nicholas tried to commit the taboo? It was Huey, who led you and defeated Nicholas. As a result, Huey successfully planted a bomb called Historia deep within the Military Nation. He essentially made a traitor who would betray the Military Nation for personal feelings at the most decisive moment into a Six-Star General!"
Siati was already freed. Nevertheless, Siati stared at me without any intention of attacking him. With a face struggling as if wanting to express something but unable to shape it into words, emotions caught in her throat.
'It's gotten to her. No, it had to. Prophets have always been objects of hatred and persecution. It only changed when the Holy Court gained power...'
Confirming that his intentions had sufficiently taken root, Ziekrund smirked and continued speaking.
"Now. It's simple logic! If the Pied Piper has power approaching omniscience or prescience, or even intuition close to that. Why did he leave the children to die in Hamelin? Why didn't he realize the Chief Instructor's plan to commit a taboo beforehand? Obviously, because he intended everything! Otherwise, it can't be explained!"
"No!"
Historia was relatively better off.
Her regret was directed at herself for not acting at that time. Whether I was the culprit or whatever, it was guilt over letting a tragedy slip by that she could have stopped with her power.
But if you ask whether her feelings toward me were the same as before, that's also no.
"Don't listen! This is his scheme! He's trying to cause internal division!"
"His plan that began before my scheme. No, should I call it fate! Shouldn't you question him first before interrogating me, Historia?!"
Historia shouted loudly as if to drown out Ziekrund's voice. However, Ziekrund's vocalization, trained through acting, didn't go anywhere. Still with his voice piercing her ears, Historia recoiled in disgust and grabbed me.
"Huey! Quickly, tell me! You were just caught up in it!"
Even Historia, who wants to believe me, cannot erase the creeping doubt. Gradually pouring resentment and distrustful gazes. A swamp of doubt from which I cannot escape whether I keep my mouth shut or open it to say something.
Honestly, I was caught up in it. But there were plenty of chances to avoid it, and countless ways to flee.
Still, I stayed in Hamelin. Even knowing Nicholas would drive the children to death, I followed his plan.
Because.
"I was caught up in it. What he said isn't wrong. I knew about Nicholas's plan."
"...Huey?"
"I still followed it. Because that was Nicholas's wish."
Historia faltered and stepped back at my noticeably changed attitude. I pushed past Historia and took a step forward.
To Siati, enveloped in fear beyond confusion, and to Ziekrund, who was thoroughly enjoying himself.
'Finally decided to speak? Yes, it'll be hard to slip away without revealing it now. You who've achieved what you wanted using only others' power, losing trust would be fatal!'
That's right. But there's one thing different.
Regardless of Ziekrund's speculation, in reality I'm just an ordinary person who knows a little mind-reading. I don't know any grand mystery like prophecy.
But I don't have to be honest. Do you know how I survived in Tantalus?
"Mr. Ziekrund. Why do you think I left Nicholas alone before he committed the taboo? Would you like to guess?"
"To fulfill the prophecy."
"No. It's because he too had to have a chance to fulfill his wish."
"...Wish?"
Yes, wish.
Nicholas was certainly a calculating person who treated humans below his standards as insignificant, but until that incident, he was a kind instructor to me. Even committing the taboo was him forcibly creating a stage, preferring to dirty his own hands.
Ah, of course I'm not grateful at all. He was just faithful to his own desires.
"He wanted to contribute to the Military Nation. To me, who could become a Six-Star General by merely increasing the size of my power, or perhaps look beyond that, he wanted to forcibly give me power."
"But you didn't accept it. The Holy Court rejects the existence of taboos."
"No. It's different. Not because it was a taboo, but because it would change me. I, who have the homeostasis to maintain myself, had to resist it. So I joined forces with friends who shared the same goal and stopped him."
Nicholas lacked the strength to enforce his will. So he was defeated. The children achieved an inspiring victory against the instructor.
"But even in victory, the children lost what they wanted. They participated in the graduation training because they wanted to be acknowledged by this country, but what they realized was only the fact that the country had abandoned them. Everyone resented and hated the Military Nation."
Ziekrund's laughter slowly stopped.
"...So, you came to bring down the Military Nation as they wished?"
"No. The number of people who can have the wish to bring down a country is extremely limited. A country is too large and not visible at a glance, so even the people involved don't know what a country is. How can you hate something you don't know? If it were a kingdom, you'd just strike down the king, but the Military Nation is a country without a king."
"Then? What was their wish?"
"The most irresponsible and most burdensome wish."
And also the most common wish in the world. I lowered my eyes and muttered.
"Even as they died, they just wanted to be remembered."
Even if they chose to die themselves, having no will or strength to live on, they hoped this death wouldn't be meaningless. They wanted someone to understand their suffering and despair.
"But there is neither heaven nor hell in this world. The afterlife does not exist. Naturally, aside from themselves, there is no one to remember them."
Death is an end in itself. There is nothing beyond it, and death is merely another name for stillness.
Like a rolling stone stopping when it hits something, like floating clouds turning into water droplets and falling—a natural result. No, nature itself.
The metaphysical and surreal meaning forcibly assigned to that place is a delusion that can't even be called an illusion.
Yet I cannot abandon even that wish.
"I am the world's smallest columbarium. A library that mourns the forgotten."
I remember all who have passed through. Because that was their wish.
Since death has no meaning, the cry of being prepared to die is a respectable excuse. A promissory note that no one intends to repay.
But somewhere, someone is slowly paying that irresponsible debt. Because that is a wish.
"The Pied Piper."
Leading the wandering children, teaching them how to fight against strong foes. And remembering the dead children, I repeat.
"The doctor from the East. A passing scholar. A wandering mercenary. A hermit sage. A mendicant monk. A wayfarer. Called by such names."
A desire to achieve even by committing taboos, crossing forbidden boundaries, breaking prohibitions.
Whispering methods to achieve what cannot be accomplished with ordinary thinking. A character that must exist in at least one story, whether a fairy tale, a play, a legend, or an epic.
"An ordinary person."
I didn't tell all the truth, but everything I said is true. No matter how much they doubt and investigate, they won't be able to find a contradiction.
Unable to find a contradiction in the end, Ziekrund tentatively concluded my words as truth for now.
'There are some similar traditions. A trunk that calls forth nightmares, a lamp that grants wishes, etc. But can a single human possess that kind of mystery...?'
My identity is a mind-reader. Facing people's explicit wishes, I grant those wishes if possible. Only if possible, though.
So if I hide my mind-reading and emphasize that point, it's not a lie.
Ziekrund, with some lingering attachment to what he had previously claimed, tested me.
"...You're saying you're not a prophet sent by the Holy Court?"
"There's no way I could be a prophet. After the first saint was crucified, only saints can prophesy. How could I, a man, prophesy?"
"That kind of thing can be fabricated. The saint is pulling the strings from behind, or you're moving after receiving revelation. Or you deceived your gender through some method. There are many ways to deceive."
Whether due to his own shapeshifting abilities or a professional habit. He has quite open thinking. If a regressor were in front of me, my cross-dressing would have been exposed.
"Wow, I'm actually a woman, and a saint at that? From my standpoint, the last option is the most attractive! I've wanted to experience a woman's body at least once in my life! Ah!"
Clapping as if he just remembered, he pointed at Ziekrund.
"Come to think of it, there's someone right in front of me who has experienced changing bodies. Until a while ago you were Historia, then you changed to that Carapald guy, right? How does it feel to become a man? No, should I ask how it felt to become a woman? Mr. Ziekrund, what is your original appearance?"
"...Normally I shouldn't reveal it, but there's no point in hiding it in front of you. It's also disrespectful to wear a dead friend's face."
Muttering words that made me doubt whether a person could really say such a thing, he covered his face with his palm and restructured his skeleton. A rattling sound was heard as the bones and muscles held by qi were rearranged. His hair changed to pitch black from the roots.
Returning to his 'original appearance' was several times faster and more natural than transforming. Probably because he constantly reminds himself of his own 'original appearance.'
A man with an immaculately neat appearance appeared. A man to whom the description 'ordinary-looking' fit perfectly, like a blank white canvas in a negative sense. Average height. Slightly thin build. The 'original appearance' that kept flickering whenever I read Ziekrund's thoughts...
"Don't fool me after coming this far. How is that your original appearance?"
Not this.
"A featureless face. Average height. Moderately thin body. A master of qi is like that? Come on, no way. No matter how I look at it, that's the default setting value of Aki Avatar, isn't it?"
Ziekrund answered immediately.
"I don't know what you're talking about. This is me, the Military Nation's Six-Star General Ziekrund's original appearance."
"Ah. That kind of setting?"
Humans don't picture their own faces in their minds. Because their own face, their own body, is always there.
Paradoxically, the fact that Ziekrund constantly reaffirmed his identity, recalling his original body in his mind so as not to forget it—
"Then what about before you became a Six-Star General? Before that, what name and face did you live with? No, what face did you have before you learned shapeshifting?"
Ziekrund's face contorted. The blank face heaved, drawing an expression of displeasure. Truly, a face perfectly suited for display purposes.
That's precisely why it can't be real.
I erased the smile from my face and pressed him.
"Who the hell are you?"