098. Because It Comes and Goes -1
Clearly, fatigue had been accumulating in my body without me realizing it.
Because the discomfort in my calf had lasted longer than expected.
Honestly, the examination results had come back fine, and from my perspective, it hadn't been severe pain, either.
I had thought that if I rested for a short week, or at most two, I would be able to return without issue.
The doctor had said I simply needed rest; he hadn't brought up frightening words like injury recovery or rehabilitation, after all.
I had believed, without a shadow of a doubt, that I would be able to return to the training ground after just a brief rest.
But the discomfort refused to fade.
I managed to get off the crutches after a week through a re-examination, but… being able to go about daily life and being in physical condition to play a match were completely different things.
Taking a morning walk or going to the fruit shop to buy fruit was no strain at all, yet the moment I thought, "If I can do this, I must be pretty much healed," and tried jogging a little, I immediately felt the discomfort.
To me, it felt as if my calf was throwing a tantrum.
As if to say, "I've suffered so much all this time, and since you don't appreciate that suffering, I'll let you know one way or another."
How much could a brat like it have suffered, really?
Hmm.
Well, come to think of it… it was true that I had been sprinting at full speed for the past several months.
I had really run all this way without rest.
From being a nobody on the U17 team to a first-team starter.
Having broken through that long distance in just a few months, there couldn't have been any time to breathe in between.
I had even started far behind the starting line.
Because I was lagging far behind everyone else, I had no choice but to run faster, and even when others rested, I had no choice but to keep running.
It was thanks to that that I had made it this far.
Now my calf, unable to endure any longer, had declared a strike—so what could I do?
I had no choice but to stop for a moment.
The club wanted me to return in perfect physical condition, even if it took time.
They said it didn't matter whether it took one month or two, and I received an "order" to come back only after getting sufficient rest.
Since the league would be nearly over in two months, it effectively meant I could rest for the remainder of the season.
Of course, I didn't think I would need that long.
The doctor's opinion was the same, and from my perspective, a month at most.
I intended to return to the field within that time.
However, even if I had to rest for two months, I somehow felt I would be able to rest with a peaceful heart.
What I mean is… I wasn't anxious.
Even lying around doing absolutely nothing but devouring food, my mind was not anxious.
That had always been the case for me.
The type whose mind is at ease when the body suffers, but ill at ease when the body is comfortable.
So even when resting, I had always been the type who couldn't stay still and had to be doing something.
But not this time.
During the first week when I had to live with crutches, I literally did nothing at all.
I just got up, ate, lay back down without even washing, and read books all afternoon.
Then I would get up and wash right before Jiu arrived, eat together, and talk while watching TV until evening.
Of course, my body itched to move during that time… but at least my mind was not uncomfortable.
If I think about why, well.
I think it's because the feeling of being chased by something, which I'd always felt until now, had disappeared.
Surely, until now, I had been running to escape from something chasing me from behind.
Then something I wanted to reach out and grab appeared before my eyes, adding another reason I had to run without rest.
Still, whatever had been chasing me had not stopped its pursuit.
I remained forever the chased, and therefore couldn't rest with a peaceful mind.
My nape had even tingled at the thought of being caught.
But the fact that someone like me could rest peacefully meant that whatever had been chasing me all this time was now, finally, giving up on me—or so it seemed.
Thanks to that, for the first time in a very long while—no, perhaps for the first time ever.
I was able to enjoy rest with a peaceful heart.
And just how much I was enjoying it…
Me: In the fridge fruit drawer
Me: There are cherry tomatoes
Me: Bring some to my room
Lying in bed, I fiddled with only my fingers to send the messages.
Surprisingly, a clattering sound came from the living room beyond the door, and I held back a laugh.
Soon the door burst open, and my personal nurse appeared holding cherry tomatoes.
"Ah, damn, you really make me do everything. Here!"
…Hmm.
A nurse with a bit of a nasty temper.
I accepted the plastic container of cherry tomatoes Jiu held out and asked.
"Did you wash them?"
"…You wanna die?"
"No. I'll just eat them."
"Ha. Of course I washed them, so eat up without worry."
Holding back a laugh at Jiu's reaction, I popped a cherry tomato into my mouth.
I hadn't done it specifically to be annoying, but I suppose that's how it looked to Jiu.
Jiu, sitting at the foot of the bed, glared at me and let out a hollow laugh.
Well, a stranger looking at this might think I'm bullying Jiu, but that's not the case.
Ever since the day I was injured, Jiu had volunteered to nurse me back to health.
I hadn't asked for it.
No, it's not like I was seriously injured or in severe pain anywhere.
It was so absurd I said I was fine, but Jiu packed a bag and came straight to our house.
Saying she would sleep in the living room and to ask her for anything I needed.
The funny thing is, my soft-hearted dad gave up the bed in his room to Jiu, so my poor dad ended up sleeping in the living room.
Even funnier was that porridge was the breakfast menu the next morning.
Saying that whether it's a calf or whatever, if it hurts, you start with porridge.
At this point, I started to think it wasn't because she was really worried about me, but that she just wanted to play nurse.
"Hey. But what kind of person eats tomatoes in the middle of the night? First time I've seen someone have tomatoes for a late-night snack."
Jiu said gruffly.
She had been overly sincere about nursing the first few days, but after a few days, it seemed she got a bit tired of it.
"Then what do you eat?"
"I mean, usually the best late-night snack is something greasy. Like chicken."
"I'm not hungry."
"Then why are you eating tomatoes?"
Hmm.
I was momentarily at a loss for words.
The truth is, I hadn't called for her because I really wanted tomatoes.
At times like this, changing the subject is best.
"Open the window for me."
"Can't you do that much by yourself now?"
"I could, but if I get up and put my legs down, I might shock my calf, or accidentally bump into the corner of the desk—"
"Fine. I'll open it. Shut up."
I desperately held back my laughter at the sight of Jiu clicking her tongue in exasperation and heading toward the window.
It's so fun like this; isn't it natural to want to make her do one more thing?
"Haah, the night air is nice."
Jiu, having opened the window and sat back at the foot of the bed, spoke while taking a deep breath.
Cool night air flowed in through the dark window, and I flared my nostrils too.
For a brief moment, we stayed like that, wordlessly welcoming the night air.
Then Jiu spoke.
"I suddenly remembered the old days."
"…Back then?"
"How did you know I was thinking of 'back then'?"
"Are you talking about when I slept over at your house?"
"…What the heck. Can you see inside my head?"
Well, obviously. Because I was thinking the exact same thing.
"Anyway, sitting here like this made me think of it. Remember when we opened the window in the attic and watched the stars?"
"I remember."
"It was fun, back then."
"It was fun."
Jiu and I moved our gazes to the window at the same time.
Beyond the window, only the neighbor's wall was visible, but for some reason, I felt like I could see stars.
"You were really funny back then."
"About what?"
"You whined that you couldn't sleep because it was your first time sleeping somewhere other than your own bed, so I sang you a lullaby."
"…I don't remember that."
"Don't lie. You remember."
"I don't."
"Wow, unbelievable. So you don't remember anything embarrassing."
…My face flushed instantly, and I pulled the blanket slightly closer.
No, it was because I was really little back then.
And I only said I couldn't sleep; I never asked for a lullaby.
She sang it on her own.
"Can't sleep now either? Want me to sing you a lullaby?"
"…What are you on about."
"I'll make you remember back then. It's time to sleep now. If you don't sleep, I can't clock out either."
Saying that, Jiu suddenly stood up and came close.
"W-what are you doing."
"Close your eyes. I'll put you to sleep."
Then she sat by my bedside and really started singing a lullaby.
Even patting my chest over the blanket with her hand…!
"Rock-a-bye, rock-a-bye. Not our baby, but our Jian. Sleeping so soundly, our Jian."
At that utterly unfunny act, I clutched the blanket tightly, but finally couldn't stand it and shouted.
"Ah, get out now!"
"Huh. Why are you suddenly getting angry?"
"I-it's not anger… I'm really sleepy, so get out…"
"What, I'll sing until you fall asleep like back then."
"Ah, I said get out…"
"Hah, really. Ungrateful brat who doesn't know the grace of a wonderful older sister like me. Fine, I'm going, I'm going. Sleep well, punk."
"…"
At my irritated reaction, Jiu got up and left the room grumbling.
And after the door closed…
"…."
I pulled down the blanket and slapped my cheek hard.
Lee Jian, you crazy bastard.
How could you think such thoughts, you animal…
"…Phew."
My face was still hot, and even the sigh I let out was hot.
…Now it seemed I really needed a nurse.
* * *
The day when it had already become the third week of rest.
Going to the hospital steadily, getting this and that examination, and trying simple exercises.
The doctor finally said the words I had been waiting for.
"It seems you can join training next week. Your recovery is indeed fast. I think you've even built more muscle in the meantime."
The words that I could return to training next week.
Honestly, I felt I could return immediately without issue, but I had been waiting for the doctor's permission, since I couldn't afford another problem by rushing.
That permission had finally come, and the thought of being able to return next week made my heart thump for some reason.
It wasn't the thumping of not wanting to go like in the old days, but the excitement of wanting to go.
Though I was clearly no longer someone being chased, the desire to run was still the same.
Now, I wasn't running away—I was running to catch.
The things I wanted to catch were already fleeing far ahead, and I had to run to catch them.
Even if no one told me to. I myself wanted to.
"Ah, I'm so frustrated I could die, seriously. Why can't they get a single shot off!"
"The opponent is strong, Jiu."
"Strong my foot. We completely destroyed them last time!"
"That's because Jian was there back then."
"Ah, this is all your fault. Lee Jian!"
While we were all watching the TV broadcast together, I was caught in the crossfire.
We were watching the league match between Fiorentina and AC Milan, and now the time was ticking into the eightieth minute.
We were trailing 0–2 in the match.
"Surely… it is a bit frustrating. At this rate, the league standings are one thing, and if we lose twice in a row, the second leg of the semifinals will get harder too."
Dad said with a sigh.
The week before last, there was the first leg of the Coppa Italia semifinals.
The opponent was AC Milan, and we lost 0–2.
And today, though the match wasn't over yet, if it ended like this, it would mean two consecutive losses to Milan.
The second leg of the semifinals against that Milan was the week after next.
Fighting again against a team you've lost to twice in a short time, and from a disadvantaged position at that, would be a very difficult battle.
I could understand Dad's sigh.
So, I thought I should reveal the doctor's opinion around now.
"Um, don't worry too much about the second leg."
"Why? Because it's our home? But today is home too."
"No, that's not it. I… if things go well, I think I can play again starting from that match."
At my words, Dad and Jiu turned their heads to look at me simultaneously.
Both of their eyes widened.
"Really?"
"R-really?"
"Yes. The hospital said I can return to training next week. So I was thinking I might be able to play in the match the week after next."
"W-well, that's wonderful!"
"Great! That's great!"
Dad and Jiu high-fived each other in joy.
At that sight, I burst into a grin too.
"Yeah, you gotta show them! When you were there, they were nothing special, right? Huh?"
"Right. With Jian here, whether it's Milan or whoever, there's nothing to worry about!"
"You'll show them, right? Huh?"
To Jiu, who was looking at me with sparkling eyes, I nodded.
"I'll show them."
They were eyes that made it impossible not to nod, but regardless, it wasn't a forced nod.
I wanted to be there soon, running with my seniors.
And I wanted to taste the fans' cheers and the joy of victory again.
No matter how sweet the rest was, my body was now itching unbearably.
It wasn't because I hadn't washed.
I had showered earlier.