* * * *
Looking back, I was a complete fucking dumbass.
No, I was just born a natural-born shit-stirrer.
I had one long-standing hobby.
Maybe since middle school?
Anyway, it was a hobby I started quite young.
Trolling on DC Inside.
The method was simple.
First, enter any gallery.
Then lurk for a few days and figure out that gallery's mainstream opinion—the gallery public opinion.
Then post something exactly opposite to that opinion, pretending to be logical or innocent.
Shall I give an example?
Going to a baseball gallery burning with fervor for a specific team and sucking off another team like crazy.
"Honestly, isn't Hanwha going to win it all this year? lol If you disagree, you're absolutely right."
Like that.
Then fans of other teams rush in frothing at the mouth.
In a female idol gallery, deliberately pick and post only unflattering photos.
"Our Jieun... did you gain some weight?"
Just one sentence and it's over.
I could see the spectacular sight of hundreds of profanities filling the comments.
I found watching those reactions incredibly fun.
The sight of dozens, hundreds of people freaking out over just a few words I wrote.
The sight of some anonymous stranger I'd never seen biting down hard on the bait I threw, seething with rage.
It was indescribably thrilling.
Perhaps my marriage was also an extension of that trolling.
My family's fierce opposition.
The more my parents, older brother, and younger sibling opposed, the more the troll DNA inside me squirmed.
'They oppose it this much? Makes me want to be a contrary little shit.'
In the end, I succeeded in the greatest troll of my life.
Was there ever a bigger dumbass?
Among my many trolling repertoires, the most fun was undoubtedly the Stock Gallery.
Commonly called Ju-Gallery.
A place where hatred and doubt toward women and marriage never died down, twenty-four hours a day.
People pointed fingers and called it the Misogyny Gallery, but honestly, not a single thing they said was logically wrong.
"Bastards who are good at everything except stocks."
Was there any phrase more perfect to describe the Ju-Gallery users?
In truth, this emotion called misogyny had an ancient history.
It was something I first learned while hanging out in Ju-Gallery.
Great sages and ancient intellectuals.
Their famous quotes contained deep-rooted insight into women.
"Women inherently possess a physiology insufficient for achieving enlightenment."
"Creating woman was God's only mistake. Women are emotional and lack depth, thus they can never become wise."
"Creating woman was God's second mistake."
"Do not believe a woman's tears when you see them. For it is a woman's nature to cry when things do not go her way."
Does all of this look fabricated?
You can find all of these with a single internet search.
For thousands of years, the wise have seen through the essence of women and warned of it.
Only modern society, stained with PC-ism, is turning a blind eye to that truth.
Ju-Gallery was merely repeating the truth that had continued for thousands of years.
Now I've become a Ppongppong man and believe in Ju-Gallery's theories, but just a year ago, I was the exact opposite.
Back then, I couldn't understand the Ju-Gallery users.
No, a more accurate expression would be that I didn't want to understand.
Sharing passionate love with my wife every night, waking up to a lovely face beside me—how could I have understood their screams mixed with hatred?
Their posts looked like nothing but losers' self-consolation, or moral victories at best.
So I started trolling.
Under my fixed nickname, 'Failed Man.'
It was an act that went beyond simple fun, even feeling like a kind of mission.
'I'll show these Failed Men clearly what real happiness is.'
Of course, we didn't have a child back then.
But what did that matter?
You can get as many cute baby photos as you want with one search.
My trolling was relentless.
[Put my son to bed and having a beer with the wife lol]
(Photo: downloaded from the internet, a baby sleeping soundly)
—This is happiness lol Aren't you guys gonna live your whole lives without ever knowing this kind of happiness? Sob You poor bastards lol
[Wife wanted to wear couple tees with our son, so I bought them lol]
(Photo: also downloaded from the internet, back view of a baby and mom wearing couple tees)
—This is the joy of making money! I could devote my very life without hesitation for my wife and child! You guys should hurry up and get married too! This is what completes a man's life!
My posts always received explosive reactions.
Hundreds of comments filled with curses and sneers.
— Fabrication, fuck off
— This Failed Man bastard puts real effort into his fabrications lol
When I trolled Ju-Gallery as Failed Man, there was a repertoire I enjoyed the most.
Changing my age and job to mock them.
I wanted to laugh at their loser logic.
So sometimes I became a successful businessman in his late twenties.
[I'm a 28-year-old self-made businessman, and I'm marrying a 21-year-old college student.]
—Decided to get married after six months of dating. As expected, money and ability are everything for a man. Instead of cursing women in your room, work on self-improvement, you Failed Men lol
As always, my post drew explosive aggro.
The comment section was filled with all sorts of curses and profanity.
— Fuck, there's still a crazy bastard marrying a Korean woman lol
— Stop with the fabrications, you motherless bastard
— Businessman, yeah right lol
I felt ecstasy watching them freak out.
Their figures trembling with rage on the other side of the monitor.
There was no better spectacle.
The truth didn't matter.
What mattered was the very fact that they got heated reading my post.
Their anger was a report card showing that my post had struck a nerve with the users.
For over a year, I reigned as Ju-Gallery's official Ppongppong man and happiness evangelist.
Thinking about it now, I was truly insane.
Because I never dreamed that the curses the Ju-Gallery users poured out would become my reality exactly one year later.
* * * *
The crack in my happy married life began exactly one year later.
These days, whenever I tried to touch my wife at night, she would often get annoyed and avoid me.
'What the hell! Why are you like this lately?'
I grumbled only in my mind.
Well, she must not be in good condition.
I thought that and let it go.
But after being rejected several more times, my pride as a man was hurt.
So I stopped pressing her.
I am a person with very strong pride.
Maybe because I grew up receiving nothing but love.
Being refused made me stubborn.
'Fine. I'm never doing it with you until you come begging.'
" no more dick!! "
I shouted timidly to myself.
The bed that used to whisper love turned into a desolate space where we simply slept apart.
The days my wife went outside became noticeably more frequent.
Naturally, the state of the house became a mess.
After watching this for several months, I finally called my wife.
And spoke as calmly as possible.
"Jisu. Why are you like this these days? You're barely home, just wandering the streets... What are you unhappy about?"
Jisu replied with a sulky face.
"What, it's not like I go out every day! I'm suffocated staying home all the time! Am I some servant who does housework?"
...What the fuck!?
Look at the tone she's using?
Having grown up in a prestigious old-money family, I had a patriarchal mindset.
'A woman... talking back?'
Makes me want to slap her.
But in this era of female supremacy, doing that would cause huge trouble.
I let out a deep sigh and spoke again.
"Why are you talking like that. Honestly, we haven't even been intimate lately. You keep going outside. I'm just worried."
Jisu made an expression of pity.
"Did you marry me just to do that? How pathetic. Am I a machine? A whore? I'm in a bad mood now, so I'm going out."
With that, Jisu slammed the door and left.
....What the fuck?
What is this bullshit?
I really couldn't understand.
I had clearly tried to talk nicely.
What came back was only a sharp reaction.
It had only been one year of marriage.
How can a person change so much?
Where on earth did the wife go who used to whisper that she loved me?
In the empty living room, I remained alone, dazed and desolate.
Being alone in the empty house, all sorts of stray thoughts came to me.
What did I do wrong?
No, am I even the one who did something wrong?
My head felt like it would explode.
I wanted to open up to someone, but I was too embarrassed to tell my friends.
Then, without realizing it, I pressed the computer power button.
And headed, as always, to DC Inside's Stock Gallery.
Even though I knew there was no answer to my life on the internet.
When life became bleak, seeking out a community first was the fate of a gallery-addicted life.
Of course, I couldn't write as Failed Man.
The happiness evangelist bitching about fighting with his wife.
Just imagining it was horrifying.
That, I had to prevent at all costs.
I quietly started writing under a floating nickname.
[Help me out... my wife is acting strange...]
—Newlywed for just over a year. At first we burned passionately, but lately we sleep in separate rooms. When I suggest it, she throws a fucking tantrum saying she's tired, and going out has increased a lot lately. It's hard to say anything since she swipes my husband card. Today I tried to talk nicely, and she went off asking if I married her for sex, then stormed out. Did I just get properly dishwashed? Is this right? Is it, you bastards!?
The moment I posted, comments started flying in at a terrifying speed.
— lmao Another dishwasher has entered the gallery
— Dumbass.
— "Tried to talk nicely" lolol Can't hide that Sweet Guy DNA
— Just get divorced, dumbass. Now is when it's cheapest.
— Yeah, collect evidence that she abandoned housework.
— Husband card lolol What a dutiful bastard.
— Private detective, just say the word.
I read through the comments blankly.
Most of them were mocking and ridiculing me.
'I'm the crazy bastard for asking these bastards.'
I seemed to have come to the wrong place.
Ah.
For now, when she comes home, I should talk without getting angry.