Anything hidden in a haze always made you pay the price later.
Things that had simply passed by like background at the time, a single notation that seemed to mean nothing, one line of dialogue tossed off in passing.
The further you went, the more those things strangled you.
There was a high chance this would be the same.
I let out a long sigh, then pushed myself up.
Lying down when I had no intention of sleeping was the most useless thing of all.
It only made me more tired for no reason.
I went to the desk and lit the lamp again.
When the wavering light settled, the notes I had roughly scribbled during the day came back into view.
How far should I move right now?
I pressed one corner of the notebook with my finger.
Honestly speaking, I could go down tonight.
If I made up my mind, it wasn’t as if I couldn’t.
I had roughly checked the dorm supervisor’s patrol route, and the path to the southeast iron gate was in my head.
But that was too soon.
If I went down now, half of whatever I saw would be guesswork.
I didn’t know what was below, why it was leaking upward, or why a kid like Rine was reacting first.
If I charged in like that, I’d miss more than I gained.
Most of all.
Rine wasn’t going to collapse right this instant.
I paused on that thought for a moment.
…Not yet.
That was the important part.
Rine still looked fine.
She smiled, reached out first, said she was all right, and pretended it didn’t show even when she pushed herself too hard.
In the original work, too, Rine always held out until the very end before collapsing at the last moment.
In other words, it wasn’t urgent enough to jump in immediately.
Nice.
Tonight, instead of going down right away, I’d pass a note to Erka.
I’d check whether she had obtained any materials, and only tell her to meet me on the southeast side tomorrow night.
And tomorrow during the day, I’d check Rine’s condition one more time.
After that, it wouldn’t be too late to go down at night.
I took out a sheet of paper.
There was no need to write at length.
That person didn’t seem like the type to like that, either.
Tomorrow night.
Bring whatever materials you have.
How sincere.
But the one receiving it would probably feel more comfortable with just that much.
People’s tastes were so depressing.
I folded the note, tucked it into my clothes, and lowered the lamp flame.
After that, I sat on the bed and stared blankly at my fingertips for a while.
It wasn’t because I pitied Rine, nor because I felt affectionate toward her.
It was just that if that kid truly started getting caught up in this here, things would drag on for a long time afterward.
Even in the original work, Rine was always dragged into the heart of incidents.
Not because she wanted to, but because she was the one who wore down first.
Rine wasn’t a character whose story ended with herself alone.
Sacred Law, sanctuaries, brands, purification, rituals, consumption.
Everything on that side came attached to her.
So I couldn’t take my eyes off this.
I leaned my back against the wall and closed my eyes until it was time to pass along the note.
The next day, strangely enough, the sunlight was perfectly normal.
I buttoned my uniform, left my room, and headed to the dining hall.
Today, I deliberately looked around a little.
I took a tray and sat in a corner.
The soup was lukewarm again today.
At this point, the kitchen was a kind of talent too.
I dipped bread into the soup and ate while glancing over the people.
Rine came into view quickly.
She was mixed in among the others as usual.
Her smile, the habit of her reactions, the way she tilted her head and listened when the kid beside her said something—none of it was very different from yesterday.
On the surface.
I ate another spoonful of soup and stood up.
As I left the dining hall, a set of footsteps followed behind me.
It was Rine.
To be precise, she had come out from behind only after I left first. Our routes just happened to overlap.
I slowed my steps very slightly.
Rine seemed to have noticed me too.
We had only spoken briefly in the corridor yesterday, so it wouldn’t have been strange if she pretended not to know me and passed by.
“…Hello.”
Rine was the one who greeted me first.
Her voice was still gentle. But it sounded just a little more cautious than yesterday.
I nodded.
“Yeah.”
When I answered shortly, Rine smiled awkwardly.
“About yesterday… I’m sorry I made you worry for no reason.”
At those words, I looked at Rine once.
She apologized first.
Not a good habit.
The type who brought up her own fault first if she thought she had made someone else uncomfortable.
Kids like that were similar even when they were truly breaking down.
An apology came out first.
“It’s not like I worried that much.”
When I said that, Rine’s eyes widened a little.
“It showed a lot.”
She closed her mouth for a moment.
“Do I look that bad?”
“Yeah.”
I didn’t soften it.
“More than you think.”
Rine let out a very small breath, almost like a hollow laugh.
Because that reaction felt strangely human, I continued a beat later for no reason.
“Don’t just keep saying you’re fine.”
Rine’s eyes wavered for a very brief moment.
This time, she couldn’t immediately put on a smile.
She lowered her gaze a little and said,
“…It’s a habit.”
“What is?”
“Saying I’m fine.”
The moment I heard that, I almost laughed.
Not because it was funny, but because it was too honest.
I matched my walking pace to Rine’s as we headed toward the stairs.
I hadn’t meant to do it on purpose, but my feet moved that way.
“Why?”
Rine didn’t answer right away.
Instead, she touched the strap of her book once with her fingertips, then said very quietly,
“Because everyone feels more at ease if I say I’m fine.”
Those words lingered longer than I expected.
Because everyone felt more at ease.
Nice.
The type who folded away her own condition first to reassure others.
I exhaled shortly.
“That’s according to you.”
Rine raised her head.
“Pardon?”
“You don’t know if everyone really feels at ease.”
This time, Rine couldn’t smile.
She only looked at me for a moment.
I didn’t push any further than that.
If I kept going here, Rine would close off again.
I knew that much.
With Rine, if you stepped in more than two spaces at once, she immediately drew a line.
“Anyway.”
I cut myself off and placed a hand on the stair railing.
“Don’t overdo it.”
Rine paused very slightly, then nodded.
“I’ll try.”
That answer was kind of funny.
Not “I won’t overdo it,” but “I’ll try.” It meant she already wasn’t confident she wouldn’t.
“That doesn’t sound very trustworthy.”
When I muttered that, Rine gave a genuine, very brief laugh this time.
“I’m sorry.”
“There you go apologizing again.”
“Ah…”
Only then seeming to realize she had done it again, Rine closed her mouth.
That reaction was needlessly human.
A kid who usually offered up only a composed face first became clumsy in places like this.
We walked together as far as the corridor in front of the classroom.
Going any farther together would have felt awkward instead.
Rine looked as if she knew that too.
“Well, then.”
Rine spoke first.
“I’ll see you later.”
“Yeah.”
Rine turned away like that.
I didn’t watch her back for long.
We weren’t at that stage, and if I did, I’d look even more suspicious.
Instead, another set of footsteps attached itself about three steps behind me.
They were so quiet that I noticed late.
It was Mia.
I had no idea when she had arrived.
This one followed like a shadow rather than a person.
I should have gotten used to it by now, but sometimes she still startled me.
“Senior.”
“What?”
Mia looked in the direction Rine had disappeared, then shifted her gaze to me.
“That person.”
I stopped walking.
“What about her?”
Mia’s ears moved by the tiniest amount.
“She’s strange.”
“What is?”
“The smell.”
For a moment, I looked down the corridor where Rine had disappeared.
Then I looked back at Mia.
I pretended to think it over carefully.
“She smelled nice to me.”
Mia’s eyes widened for an instant.
Then her hand came out immediately.
Thump.
It was true that she hit me lightly.
The problem was that the one who hit me was Mia.
I was pushed half a step sideways and knocked my shoulder against the wall.
“That hurts!!!”
“That’s not what I meant!!”
Her voice burst out softly.
She was angry, but perhaps because she had no intention of shouting in the middle of the corridor, she forcibly swallowed the end of it down.
Nice.
Whether it was jealousy, irritation, or wariness, her face had a little of all three mixed in.
I rubbed my shoulder once.
“It was a joke.”
“It wasn’t funny.”
“I know.”
Nice.
At this point, it was hard to insist this was just my own sensitivity.
I turned my body slightly toward one side of the corridor wall.
This wasn’t a conversation to have at length in the middle of the path other kids were using.
“What kind of smell was it?”
Mia thought for a moment, then said,
“It was similar to what I smelled behind the main building.”
At that, I didn’t answer right away.
“Not the same.”
Mia added again.
“But similar. The one that was coming up from below.”
“You’re sure?”
When I asked in a low voice, Mia nodded slightly.
“Yeah. It’s a little different from the smell of a body being sick.”
“How is it different?”
Mia frowned for a moment.
It wasn’t the face of someone who didn’t want to explain, but the face of someone trying to force herself to grasp something difficult to explain.
“It feels like it’s being pressed down from the inside.”
I was silent for a while.
Being pressed down from the inside.
Strangely enough, that expression fit perfectly.
The reason it didn’t show on the outside.
The habit of constantly saying she was fine.
She was pressing it all down.
Seeing my expression, Mia asked,
“Senior.”
“Yeah.”
“Are you going out again?”
I exhaled slowly.
“Yeah.”
Mia’s ears rose very slightly.
“What about me?”
“Get ready tonight.”
I looked at Mia.
“And before that, check what the smell is like.”
“Yeah.”
“Rine’s side too.”
“Yeah.”
“But don’t stick to her in an obvious way.”
Mia pouted a little.
“Why?”
“She’s sensitive to people’s gazes.”
“You seem to know a lot about her, Senior.”
“I just saw a little while ago.”
Mia thought for a moment, then nodded very slightly.
“Okay.”
Even after saying that, her expression clearly showed she didn’t like it.
By the time we arrived in front of the classroom, the bell signaling the start of class rang.
I grabbed the handle and opened the classroom door.
Nice.
Another day had begun pretending to be quiet.
Truly fitting for this school.
The second class ended, lunch passed, and afternoon classes began.
On days when time didn’t pass, it really didn’t pass.
The hands were clearly moving, but your insides couldn’t keep up with them.
You ended up fiddling with the back of your hand for no reason, looking out the window one more time, and getting distracted by sounds that were nothing at all.
That day was exactly like that.
By the time the last class ended, the sun had already dipped far down.
Students poured out into the corridor in droves.
I headed for the reading room.
The door was slightly open.
From inside came the sound of paper being turned.
I wondered if someone was there and was about to open the door, but before I could, footsteps sounded from within.
The door opened a little more, and Erka poked her face out.
“You have no manners.”
Those were her first words.
I leaned my shoulder against the doorframe.
“Looks like you got it.”
“Who pushes something like this through a crack in the door?”
“I don’t think you’re one to talk.”
“Come in.”
I went inside.
Without even sitting down across from me, Erka immediately took out two sheets of paper and pushed them over.
“Additional materials.”
I pulled the papers toward me.
Partial inspection records for the southeast lower section.
Access restriction history.
Lower facility maintenance requests.
Omitted reports of abnormal reactions.
Erka asked,
“What’s the plan?”
“Wait. One more person is coming.”
Erka’s eyes narrowed very slightly.
“Who?”
Instead of answering, I turned over one sheet of paper.
Lower line fluctuations. Reinforce nighttime inspections. No access to unauthorized personnel. After reading that far, there was no need to look any further.
It wasn’t that it didn’t help, but there was nothing decisively refreshing.
Erka asked again,
“I asked who it was.”
“She’ll be here soon.”
“Don’t tell me.”
She paused very briefly.
“A beastkin?”
Without taking my eyes off the paper, I replied,
“It’s Mia.”
The corner of Erka’s mouth twisted very slightly.
“I knew it.”
“Your tone is unpleasant.”
“Because it’s true.”
What a delightful conversation.
I turned over another sheet.
When I roughly overlaid the old layout records with the recent inspection charts, there was one more dead line beneath the southeast side.
Not a line that had been completely cut off, but one that only pretended to be cut off.
A line blocked off on the surface while remaining connected below.
Watching my fingertips, Erka said quietly,
“There isn’t anything particularly useful, is there?”
“Yeah. Nothing satisfying at all.”
“Still, the direction seems right.”
“That was already right to begin with.”
Just as I covered the papers, a set of footsteps came from the corridor.
Light and quiet.
A sound you might miss completely if you noticed it late.
The crack in the door moved very slightly.
It was Mia.
Mia came and stood by the seat beside me. She didn’t sit.
She simply looked down at the papers on the table, then slightly frowned.
“The smell is bad.”
“You can smell paper too?”
“Yeah.”
Mia stared at Erka and said,
“You smell.”
Erka’s expression froze for an instant.
“…What?”
“…What are you talking about?”
Because her reaction came out too quickly, it showed even more.
She had been flustered, then immediately composed her expression.
“What smell?”
“Burnt smell.”
The tips of Erka’s ears flushed very slightly, then quickly settled.
She pretended otherwise, but she couldn’t hide it.
“I washed up this morning!!”
Mia calmly added,
“Not soap smell.”
The corners of Erka’s eyes hardened very slightly.
“Then that’s even more absurd.”
“It comes from the paper, and from you too.”
“Are you treating me the same as paper right now?”
“Similar.”
Erka exhaled shortly.
This time, she was suppressing irritation.
“You really do speak unpleasantly.”
“But it’s true.”
“That’s not my problem. Your nose must be strange.”
“Yeah. It is.”
Mia calmly nodded.
“That’s why I smelled it.”
Erka closed her mouth.
Nice.
That expression meant exactly one thing.
She had gotten riled up, but she was holding back because getting more riled up would feel like losing.
Mia won.