Episode 59
“Is there any need to think so hard? Think simply, Han Chasu.”
What did he mean by think simply? Was he telling him to admit that he had self-harmed because he was so mentally exhausted? Or was he telling him to say that strangling himself alone was actually his hobby?
‘If I called something like that a hobby, it felt like I’d be thrown into a mental hospital on the spot.’ The gaze of Jeong Iheun, who was currently looking at him, was exactly like that.
“If it’s hard, speak up. We can talk anytime.”
He wore a deliberately gentle expression, but the force flowing from his eyes was extraordinary. The intent to do as he pleased now that there was nothing more to hide was blatantly visible. ‘Is the nightmare of the lifetime contract returning?’ No wonder he hadn’t brought up the contract all this time; to think there was such a circumstance.
As Han Chasu let out a deep sigh, Baek Dam gently stroked the back of his hand. It seemed like a gesture meant to comfort him in its own way, but it wasn’t much help.
Because this guy was the same kind of person.
“Whether it’s a wound on the body or a wound on the heart, there’s no difference. If it bleeds, everyone disinfects the wound and applies medicine, right? Trauma is the same. Just trust me, Han Chasu.”
Baek Dam boasted that he knew because he had experienced it himself, and that he would make it all better. ‘Is it okay to compare tearing off a person’s limbs and slashing their carotid artery in one go to medicine…?’ It was certainly befitting of a character who had tortured the original Han Chasu to soothe the grief of losing his younger sibling. Han Chasu shook his head and removed his hand. For a moment, Baek Dam’s face soured.
“No matter how severe the wound, I do not want that kind of treatment.”
To be precise, he didn’t want to waste energy on such things. He didn’t have enough time even if he held onto Gi Taeyeon all day. Was there any need to waste it on criminals?
But since he couldn’t say that exactly as it was, he refused roughly within the bounds of common sense. At that, Baek Dam muttered in a cold voice.
“Han Chasu, are you perhaps doing this on purpose?”
“Excuse me?”
“Do you think anything will change if you blatantly bleed all over the place as if asking me to look at you, then throw a tantrum saying you don’t need anything? Pretending not to see the wound fester, do you think everything will be okay if you just close your eyes, as if such a wound never existed from the beginning?”
“…….”
Why is this guy so angry? Han Chasu reflexively tried to ask the reason, then closed his mouth. His instincts sent him a warning. That if he dug for the reason, he’d end up seeing something unpleasant.
After thinking for a moment, Han Chasu slowly opened his mouth.
“…I am not denying that I’m hurting.”
“Then?”
“I simply don’t believe that I can get better by hurting others.”
Honestly, he wanted to say that whether it was trauma or whatever, he was perfectly fine so they should all screw off. But he knew the moment he said that, the misunderstanding would only deepen.
Even if he said he was fine thousands of times here, to their ears it would only sound like desperate excuses of a hurting person. ‘I have no clue where to even begin resolving this.’ Being regarded as a benefactor was still within the expected range. Because although his actions had been for selfish purposes, he had ended up saving a person’s life.
But this kind of misunderstanding was a first, so he was utterly bewildered. ‘I never received this kind of concern even in my previous world.’ The place he had lived in was far harsher than this world in terms of environment. Limited resources and endless competition. Envy and jealousy packaged in the name of expectations targeted his neck every day, but he had never lost his mind until the end.
To think that he, of all people, would be treated so delicately….
Han Chasu felt a novel emotion.
“You still haven’t come to your senses, Han Chasu.”
Though it didn’t last long.
“But I understand one thing well. The problem was that you kept saying such weak-minded things. That’s why your guild master made all that fuss trying to dump this on me.”
Baek Dam picked up the veil that had been carelessly thrown onto the bed and hurled it toward the window. He sighed briefly at the sight of the fluttering cloth bundle flying as fast as a stone.
“The guild master put it on me… Don’t tell me that was the guild master’s item?”
Han Chasu couldn’t hide his surprise that the veil was Jeong Iheun’s taste, not Baek Dam’s. And not even wearing it himself, but putting it on others. ‘But it’s because of me?’ What a bewildering situation. His gaze alternated between Jeong Iheun and Baek Dam, filled with complexity.
“Han Chasu, wait a moment.”
Jeong Iheun called out to him with a straight face. But Han Chasu was one step faster.
“Ah, no. I asked something unnecessary. You don’t need to explain.”
He had blurted it out a moment ago in surprise. He didn’t want to know any of the complicated circumstances at all.
“I apologize, Guild Master. I was rude. Please pretend you didn’t hear it. Rather, I heard Director Gi Taeyeon’s voice earlier….”
It was at that moment that his shoulder was grabbed.
“I feel like I’ve just been suspected of something terribly filthy.”
Baek Dam glared at him, grinding his teeth. Before he knew it, his long, drooping flaxen hair brushed against Han Chasu’s cheek.
“Jeong Iheun sees you as more fragile than a newborn baby, so stop having creepy thoughts, alright?”
“Excuse me?”
“He said that since you suffered an insult while with me, you’d obviously collapse at the sight of my face, which is why he had no choice but to use it.”
In truth, it was a kind of bet.
A bet on whether Han Chasu’s trauma was truly triggered by Baek Dam himself.
So he had prepared a semi-transparent veil on purpose. If Han Chasu saw his face covered by the veil and didn’t faint, that was stage one passed.
Next was his bare face with the veil removed. If Han Chasu was fine even after seeing that, Jeong Iheun decided he would no longer stop Baek Dam.
Of course, the bet ended in Baek Dam’s victory. That was why he could confidently recommend Han Chasu to participate in torture.
Baek Dam smiled amiably and whispered to him.
“Isn’t it truly absurd? Look, even now, you’re making eye contact with me like this and it’s nothing. Your subconscious knows it too, that I saved your life.”
“…….”
“Well, anyway, since you said you don’t want counseling, the training system is the only answer after all. It’ll start within this week, so wait for it.”
“Have you not listened to a word I’ve said? I don’t need torture or anything like that.”
As Han Chasu spoke with a frown, Baek Dam let out a meaningful laugh.
“You won’t regret it?”
“Of course….”
“If you want to take on Director Gi Taeyeon bare-handed, that’s the only way.”
Han Chasu’s eyes widened. Looking into his round gray pupils, Baek Dam spoke.
“The development chief said so. That you tried to negotiate with it and ended up grabbed by the hair by Han Chasu.”
Han Chasu let out a sigh. ‘So the method to help me was referring to the training system.’ He remembered when the development chief had cut in while they were talking about contact therapy with Gi Taeyeon. He had said that despite his lower body being completely frozen, he sure went wild….
“So you’re saying that if we use that, I can do bare-handed training with Director Gi Taeyeon.”
Strength gradually gathered in his gray eyes as he slowly spat out the words. It was because he had found a breakthrough in the midst of despair. ‘Yeah, well. Misunderstandings are bound to clear up with time.’ According to Baek Dam, it seemed that a participant’s stats could be adjusted inside the training system. That meant he wouldn’t have to worry about his fist shattering on its own when thrown at Gi Taeyeon.
It was quite an appealing story to Han Chasu. Because he had wanted to change the method of contact therapy with Gi Taeyeon anyway.
However, if there was one thing bothering him.
“I don’t mind, but I don’t know if Director Gi Taeyeon will allow it.”
He was in the position of receiving treatment. If Gi Taeyeon refused, saying he couldn’t transmit energy that way, there was nothing to be done.
Wasn’t that why he hadn’t been able to ask properly even in the rooftop garden and had beaten around the bush instead?
“I’m not even sure if the treatment will go smoothly that way… And I wonder if the development chief will really permit the use of the system.”
He should have ripped out some hair back then.
As Han Chasu revealed his worries, Baek Dam snorted.
“Do you think I would have come running to you without making sure of that? I’ve already finished talking with Director Gi Taeyeon and the entire development team.”
The moment he showed a favorable reaction to the training system, Baek Dam immediately became energized. ‘Is it something to be this happy about?’ Seeing Baek Dam act this way, not Jeong Iheun, made him a bit puzzled.
“No matter how much I think about it, Han Chasu’s head only seems to spin with useless thoughts. How will you survive this harsh world alone like this?”
Was he helping me just because he wanted to make personal attacks?
As Han Chasu furrowed his brow, Baek Dam plopped down to sit on the bed. Long tresses like faded golden thread scattered over the sheet.
“So, Han Chasu.”
This somehow felt ominous. Han Chasu hurriedly tried to ask Jeong Iheun for help, but he was already a step too late.
“Have you ever thought about becoming the second child of our family?”
An adoption proposal more terrifying than a lifetime contract struck him.