Usually, whenever I had tea with Sohwi, the refreshments would be laid out in the main hall, but
today, the main hall was being used to receive guests, with folding screens and several small tables set up, so it couldn’t be used.
Surely, it would be prepared in a different location, and I had thought perhaps they would set it up in my room, but Hwaya, who was walking ahead of us, naturally passed right by my room.
Was there another place to drink tea besides my room?
I carefully tried to recall the various buildings within the estate that I had diligently familiarized myself with, but among the buildings I knew, no suitable place came to mind.
“Unni, I think we’re going to the garden.”
“That’s correct, Lady Harin.”
“Ehehe. I love your garden so much, unni!”
So there was a garden.
Though I, who actually lived in the estate, hadn’t been to the garden even once in the month since I possessed this body, it seemed Harin, who came as a guest, visited so often that she immediately thought of it.
Harin, who was utterly excited at the mention of going to the garden, held my hand and bounced along with a pitter-patter step; it was adorable and nice to see.
*Rumble, rumble*
Was she so happy to be going to the garden that she was even making rumbling sounds?
Now that I thought about it, Sohwi had said he often rested in the garden sunbathing, and I had heard that Ryu Sua herself would personally tend to the garden in her spare time.
Was it a place with precious memories that I didn’t know about?
For me, it was only a place where dark history was born.
“Unni.”
From beside me, Harin called out to me, tugging on the hand she held tightly with little jerks.
“What’s wrong?”
“It’s just, it’s just.”
Perhaps deep in thought about something, she tilted her head and looked at me, her lips moving slightly.
As if she had something to say but couldn’t think of the word, she agonized for quite a while before Harin’s mouth finally opened.
“Sua unni, aren’t you going to wear a hairpin?”
“A hairpin?”
From her mouth that had finally opened came a completely out-of-the-blue topic.
Why was Harin suddenly talking about a hairpin?
“I did put on a hair ornament here.”
“Not that, the hairpin you stick in after putting your hair up. My mom wears one….”
It seemed to be the kind of contextless question unique to young children.
Her mother wore a hairpin at home every day, so perhaps it was strange to her that I, an adult woman just like her, had my hair loose.
“Harin, would you like it if unni wore a hairpin?”
“Yes! I wish you’d put one on quickly. You’d definitely be pretty.”
Judging by her reaction, it seemed she simply wanted to see Ryu Sua with her hair neatly arranged with a hairpin.
But the maids had worked hard on my hair since morning; considering their effort, I should probably leave it as it was for today.
“What should I do? Unni doesn’t have a hairpin yet.”
For now, I decided to answer vaguely and move on.
Truthfully, I had never seen them bring a hairpin whenever I was being dressed up.
I wasn’t sure, but it seemed Ryu Sua hadn’t particularly preferred hairpins.
But at my answer, Harin tilted her head.
“You don’t have one? No, I’m sure you must….”
Harin reacted as though she had heard that something which should obviously exist was missing.
It was merely a type of hair ornament; couldn’t it be possible not to have one?
Among the estate’s maids, there were some who wore hairpins and some who didn’t use them at all.
But Harin seemed somewhat displeased, maintaining a sulky expression until we arrived at the pavilion prepared in the garden.
“My lady, if you would rest here, I will bring the tea table shortly.”
Having finished guiding us, Hwaya hurried back the way she came.
It seemed there was still much work she had to do in my stead.
Sorry; it’s because I’m a useless possessor.
Not long after Hwaya left, another maid soon appeared carrying the prepared tea table.
Unlike the tea table I shared with Sohwi, which had only a few palate-cleansing candied fruits and rice cakes, this one was prepared with a variety of yakgwa and colorful rice cakes.
It seemed honey had been added to the prepared tea, as a thick, sweet scent wafted up.
The maid set the tea table before us, then quietly took her place beside a pillar in the corner of the pavilion.
It seemed she was also tasked with guiding us back.
“Mmm.”
The moment I lifted my teacup, Harin, who had picked up a yakgwa with one hand, still couldn’t smooth out her sulky expression even while eating it.
Why was she so hung up over a mere hairpin?
Children’s stubbornness was truly hard to beat.
Thinking this, I was carefully sipping the hot tea in my cup when—
“Unni, do you hate Fox Uncle now?”
“*Pfft!* W-what?”
What kind of talk was this, dropping your yakgwa mid-bite, Harin, dear Harin?
You startled me so much I nearly spat out the tea I was sipping.
Calming my startled heart, I set down the teacup and looked at Harin.
Meeting my eyes, Harin set down the yakgwa she was holding and continued with a very serious expression.
“Earlier, you ignored him completely, turned your head away sharply. And you said you don’t have a hairpin either.”
It seemed ignoring Sohwi a little earlier had looked that way to Harin. Though I didn’t know what the hairpin had to do with anything.
If my actions, born of a slightly spiteful heart, looked that way even to a child, other guests might also question my relationship with Sohwi.
Even though the wedding had been postponed, it would be troublesome if we looked like there was discord between us.
There were many eyes watching; I should have thought about how my actions would appear.
Perhaps because I had spent my days in an estate where everyone only looked upon my actions favorably, the thought to pay attention to my surroundings had weakened.
“It’s not like that.”
“Really?”
It’s fine.
I can fix it now.
“Of course. You know how much unni loves my husband.”
If I spoke as if I loved him moderately, Harin would go back and spread the word on her own.
“How much?”
“Huh?”
“How much do you love him?”
Eyes asking back with pure innocence.
An expression that clearly showed she asked simply because she was curious, without a shred of doubt or ulterior motive.
But precisely because of that, it was an even more difficult question.
“Uh… well.”
I had opened my mouth at the child’s pure question, but the sound couldn’t easily take the form of words.
I had to explain something, but I didn’t know what to say.
How much I loved Sohwi? How would I know something like that?
“For one thing, he’s incredibly considerate, right?”
I decided to start by listing Sohwi’s good points that I had felt.
If I said something, anything, wouldn’t she be convinced?
“He understands me so well it’s as if he can see my heart.”
In truth, the Sohwi I had seen during the little over a month was a good person.
Since his true form is a fox, should I say he’s a good fox?
“He often plays mischievous pranks or makes jokes. But I like that too.”
I liked that he kept complicated thoughts at bay.
“No matter how busy he is, he always has dinner with me without fail.”
Even though I knew he was busy with various matters lately, he still made sure to take time to drink tea with me around noon.
“I don’t know what he finds so pleasing, but every time he looks at me, he’s smiling.”
But.
Contrary to my intention to just say whatever came to mind, once the words left my mouth,
“When he’s the one being teased, the way he panics is a bit… cute, too.”
Words flowed out like lies, to the point where I wondered if what I was saying was even true.
“And his true form is huge and dependable, reassuring? All those sides of him…”
Though the things about Sohwi that I—who have none of Ryu Sua’s memories—had felt flowed out effortlessly like lies,
“I like him very much.”
They were all sincere, not lies.
Of course, since what I mentioned were Sohwi’s good points.
It was only natural to like a person’s good points.
I thought these alone might not be enough to convince her, so I was about to say something more, but
“Wow…”
Harin, having heard my story, and
“…My, my. How passionate.”
The maid’s reaction was a bit strange.
Harin smiled broadly, her eyes sparkling, and bounced her body joyfully.
The maid, who had been sitting quietly, turned her head away and muttered something.
“I knew it, unni and Fox Uncle are still lovey-dovey!”
“Y-yeah… of course.”
Ah, lovey-dovey…
I hadn’t even brought up how much I loved him yet; I had only said a little of what I felt.
Yet receiving the assessment that we were lovey-dovey felt a bit strange.
It was good that I had finished without directly saying how much I loved the man, and yet.
It felt somewhat uncomfortable… as if I had started to run but stopped awkwardly in an ambiguous way.
Still, perhaps satisfied, Harin picked up the yakgwa again and began to munch.
“Mmm… just like Mom said.”
“Your mom?”
I too picked up the teacup I had set down and sipped the slightly cooled tea, then pricked up my ears at Harin’s words as she munched on the yakgwa.
“She said you’ll get married soon even if it’s postponed.”
“Ah. I see.”
The relationship between Ryu Sua and Sohwi must have been that close for others to think the same.
Indeed, since they had even received a congratulatory gift from the royal family, it was only natural for the two to hold their wedding.
“And anyway, before that… what was it? Did she say you can’t endure it anyway?”
“Can’t endure what?”
“Hate… I’m not sure.”
They probably hadn’t explained it in detail to Harin, since she was a child.
But as an adult, even hearing this much gave me a rough guess of what she meant.
Was that how the two of them looked in Harin’s mother’s eyes?
…And why did my mood suddenly plummet?
“Unni? Are you uncomfortable somewhere?”
“No. I was just surprised because the tea was a bit hot.”
“Be careful! I have trouble eating hot things too.”
It seemed my expression had gotten bad enough for the child to notice.
I had to be careful. I had gone through the trouble of speaking well so that we would look lovey-dovey… like we had a good relationship on the surface.
I couldn’t let my expression raise doubts again.
“I’ll be careful, just like Harin said.”
Besides, there was no reason for me to be in a bad mood.
It was a story about two people who had been promised in marriage from the start.
It was a fact I had known from the very first day.
…Ah. I get it.
I was in a bad mood because if I couldn’t resolve the possession, I would have to become that man’s bride.
It was such an obvious reason; I didn’t know why it hadn’t occurred to me right away.
Was this really it?
“Oh dear. Harin, it’s all over your mouth.”
“Hehe.”
That must be it. There couldn’t be any other reason.