One week before the monthly evaluation—vocal lesson time.
Today, too, I was being put through physical training.
"Teacher... can't I... stop doing... planks?"
"Come on, Dohee, let's try singing it again. One, two!"
Ugh…
"- when i first saw you~ I look and stare so deep in your eyes~"
.
.
"oh say love love love -"
The moment I finished the song, I collapsed face-down on the floor.
"Hah... I'm really gonna die..."
Teacher Kwon handed water to me as I lay collapsed and said,
"Wow, Dohee, you're so good now!"
"You mean my singing, right?"
It totally sounds like you're saying I'm good at planks.
"Of course. In that spirit, want to rest a bit and do it one more time?"
Ah.
"I can't do this anymore... Please, just evaluate me now..."
The song I'd just sung was the one I'd be performing at this month's evaluation.
"Hmm, I think I'll know for sure if you sing it just one more time."
"That's the third time you've said that..."
"Oh, really?"
"..."
"Alright then. For now, from what I can see, your fundamentals seem solid."
"Oh..."
"But I guess I'd say your emotional line is lacking."
"...? How am I supposed to sing with emotion while holding a plank?"
"You're right?"
"..."
"Then don't do the plank and sing again."
Ah.
When I finished singing again, Teacher Kwon said,
"But I've felt this normally too—Dohee, your emotional delivery is still lacking."
I sang it pretty passionately, though.
"Dohee, what's your MBTI?"
"Why my MBTI all of a sudden?"
"Tell me."
"I'm probably an ESTP."
"As expected, zero empathy."
"..."
"Go practice singing with emotion."
"Yes..."
.
.
.
For that reason, during individual practice time, I entered the vocal room and devoted myself to vocal practice.
Ugh, my throat hurts.
I've been doing nothing but vocal practice lately, so my throat feels stiff.
"A e i o u."
"Aaah."
I kept trying to loosen my throat, but the sound wouldn't come out properly.
It can't be helped. I'll give up on singing for today and just read the lyrics to find the emotional arc instead.
They say you have to immerse yourself in the character to understand the emotion....
The protagonist of the song I'm singing for this month's evaluation is a woman who fell in love with a man at first sight.
Hmm.
I guess I really do have zero empathy.
I should go for a walk.
I left the vocal room and knocked on the door of the adjacent vocal room.
—knock knock—
Seoyun, who was inside, opened the door and stuck only her head out.
"What?"
"So, is your practice going well?"
"Of course. I've got first place on lock."
"Good for you. Then wanna come out for a walk to clear your head and digest dinner?"
"Should I?"
"Yes."
"Nope, I don't want to~"
—clack—
Seoyun closed the door and resumed her practice.
Ah.
And Ua would be in rap lessons right about now.
Can't be helped.
I'll have to take a walk alone.
I left the company building and started walking alone.
Since I'm walking anyway, I should people-watch to find some emotional inspiration.
I walked for about ten minutes observing the expressions of passersby when I saw a familiar face among them.
It was Daye unnie, a fellow trainee.
And next to Daye unnie was Gang Uhyeon, a male trainee from our company who was the same age as her.
I approached her and spoke.
"Unnie, what are you doing here?"
Then Daye unnie said with a flustered expression,
"Huh? Ah... Dohee, what about you?"
"I'm just taking a walk."
"Ah, well... I came out for a quick walk too, and I ran into Uhyeon by chance, so we were heading back to the company together."
Gang Uhyeon, who was beside her, also said,
"Yeah, we just ran into each other and were on our way back to the company."
As if I'd believe that.
"Ah, I see? Then I'll finish my walk, so I'll see you back at the company."
"Y-yeah..."
Actually, it was common for trainees to date each other.
With handsome and pretty kids meeting and greeting each other every day in the same building, how could feelings not develop?
The funny thing was that the company didn't prevent this; rather, they encouraged sparks to fly by having male and female trainees take personality education and sex education lessons together in the same classroom.
They probably figured that trainees who dated would keep dating after debut anyway, so they might as well weed them out early.
Anyway, I had no idea how long those two would be able to hide it.
.
.
.
Friday, two days after the monthly evaluation.
After having dinner with Seoyun and Ua unnie, I headed to the choreography practice room upon hearing that the rankings had been posted.
When I arrived at the choreography practice room, the other trainees were all sitting around with gloomy expressions.
Did everyone rank poorly?
I approached the ranking chart posted on the wall and examined it.
And I immediately understood why everyone was depressed.
March Monthly Evaluation Rankings.
1. Kim Seoyun
2. Lee Dohee
3. Kim Naeun
4. Ji Ua
5. Han Sia
6. Kim Jiyeon
7. Yeon Dasom
Until yesterday, there had been nine female trainees.
But today's ranking chart only had seven names written on it.
The names not listed were Yeonji unnie and Daye unnie.
That meant two people had been cut this time.
Despite being in first place, Seoyun unnie's expression hardened like the other trainees when she saw the chart.
Moreover, since Daye unnie was one of the two who'd been cut and had joined the company at the same time as Seoyun unnie, there was no way she could be in a good mood.
Normally, those who consistently ranked in the lower tier were cut, but Daye unnie hadn't been in the lower tier, so it seemed her dating had finally been discovered after all.
Teacher Yerim entered the practice room and said,
"Kids, get up quickly. We have to practice."
"""Yes..."""
Though two trainees had been dismissed, dance lessons began as usual.
About thirty minutes after the lesson started, Manager Jo Soyeong entered the practice room with the two who had been cut.
Unlike Yeonji unnie, who was relatively composed, Daye unnie was still shedding tears.
Sigh, they should've been more careful...
From the company's perspective, they invested enormous amounts of money to turn trainees into celebrities, so it was inevitable that they would cut any trainee with even the slightest problem.
But having watched Daye unnie's efforts over the past two years, I couldn't help but feel sorry for her.
Manager Jo Soyeong said to us,
"Kids, Daye and Yeonji are leaving as of today... so everyone say your final goodbyes."
I approached the crying Daye unnie, hugged her, and said,
"You worked hard, unnie."
She kept crying without a word.
Sigh.
I also approached Yeonji unnie to say farewell.
After all the trainees finished saying their goodbyes and the two dismissed trainees left the room, Teacher Yerim immediately resumed the dance lesson.
And everyone danced harder than usual.
.
.
.
The next day.
After school, I got on the bus to go to the company.
While listening to music with wireless earphones, I got a call from Ua unnie.
"Hello?"
—Dohee, where are you?
"I'm on my way. I'm on the bus."
—Ah, really? More importantly, did you hear new trainees came in today?
It had become routine for new recruits to quickly fill the void whenever a trainee was cut.
"Yeah. So how many?"
—Three!
"Ah, I see."
—But do you know? Two of them are Japanese.
"Oh, really?"
—What, you're not surprised?
"It was about time. The company said they were holding global auditions since last year."
—Hmph. I thought you'd be surprised.
"I have to get off the bus now, so I'm hanging up."
—Okay~ See you in a bit!
After hanging up with Ua unnie, I got off at the bus stop near the company.
I got off at the stop and walked a bit uphill to arrive at the company.
I greeted the lobby staff and went up to the third floor to sign the attendance sheet.
As I went up to the third floor, just as Ua unnie had said, there were three people I'd never seen before standing next to Team Leader Sohyeon.
I approached and greeted them.
"Hello."
Then all three looked at me and greeted me in unison.
"Hello!" "Annyaseo." "Bangkapsumnida."
Team Leader Sohyeon said to me,
"Dohee, we're going to introduce everyone at once in the practice room anyway, so go downstairs and practice."
"Yes."
When I went down to the basement, most of the trainees were already in the practice room.
I said as I entered,
"Hello~ I'm here~"
"Dohee's here?"
"Hi~"
"Who isn't here yet?"
"Seoyun."
I don't know if it was just our company, but contrary to the rumors you see online, the trainees didn't have fierce power struggles.
If anything, we got along well.
It was just that some of us put up walls to avoid getting too attached.
Of course, the exception was that girl Kim Jiyeon, who was glaring at me even now.
Still, she seemed to know that picking a fight with me would only hurt her, so she stayed quiet after the first time.
Shortly after, Seoyun unnie entered the practice room, and then the team leader came in.
The team leader said,
"Kids, gather around."
Everyone went and stood in front of the team leader, and she spoke.
"You all know that new trainees came in today."
The team leader gestured to the new trainees waiting outside the practice room.
"Come on in, kids. Introduce yourselves."
The shortest child started first.
"Hello. My name is An Chae-eun, and I'm 13 years old! Please take care of me!"
I had a feeling she was short; finally, someone younger than me had arrived.
Next was the Japanese trainee.
"Annyeohaseo. I'm Kawasaki Azusa. I'm 12 ssal imnida."
"Azusa is 12 in Japanese age and 14 in Korean age. Azusa, from now on, when you say your age in Korea, say it in Korean age."
"Yes."
"Next, Chiyo, introduce yourself."
"Annyahaseyo. I'm Kinoshita Chiyo. I'm 16 in Korean age. Please take care of me."
This Japanese girl speaks well.
"All right. The three of you, if there's anything you don't know, ask the other kids."
"""Yes."""
The team leader then said to me,
"Dohee, raise your hand."
"Huh?"
"I said raise your hand."
I raised my hand as the team leader instructed.
"Azusa and Chiyo, if you really don't understand Korean, ask the girl with her hand raised. Dohee is good at Japanese too."
""Yes."""
Ah.
What a hassle.