This is the department store’s swimsuit section.
“Just try it on first.”
“Why would I?”
Kim Seoyun was holding a sky-blue bikini.
A truly classic, textbook bikini, without even a single frill.
“Why? It’d look pretty on you.”
“No, that’s not the point.”
When my reaction failed to satisfy her, Seoyun unnie shook the swimsuit vigorously as she tried to persuade me.
“You’re not even going to wear it in front of other people anyway, so at least try it on now.”
Of course, I had absolutely no intention of accepting.
“I’m not wearing it.”
“Lee Dohui, we have to send you off with at least one memory, as a show of solidarity and all that. Huh?”
“What on earth does a memory have to do with my wearing a bikini?”
Is she seriously crazy?
“Then when are you ever going to try one on?”
“How is it any different from just wearing underwear in the first place?”
“Who are you going to show it to besides us?”
“Who would I show it to!?”
As our voices gradually grew louder, Seoyun unnie glanced around, then placed her index finger to her lips and whispered.
“Hey, hey…! Your voice, your voice…!”
Fortunately, no one seemed to have noticed us.
Seoyun unnie whispered again.
“You’re not wrong, but… ah, come on. If I’m telling you to try it on, then try it on! Let’s make some memories too, huh?”
Sera unnie, who had been browsing beside us, also subtly whispered and nodded.
“That’s right, let’s make some memories…!”
“No, what does me wearing a bikini have to do with making memories…?! You—”
You crazy bitches.
“You’re always bragging about how big your chest is, but this is where you draw the line?”
“Exactly…!”
The two of them continued their nagging brainwashing from either side of me.
“How can you never do us a favor even once? We’re not telling you to buy it. We’re just asking you to try it on.”
“Exactly…!”
“What’s there to be embarrassed about between us? We’ve already seen everything there is to see and everything there isn’t to see…!”
“What do you mean, you’ve seen everything? Have you ever seen me walking around the dorm in nothing but underwear? Maybe Harang unnie or Hana unnie, but have I ever done that? Huh?”
“You always have to act all cold and rational at times like this. Geez!”
“Exactly…!”
More than anything, I’m embarrassed because I’m embarrassed, damn it.
In the end, ignoring the older girls, I hastily picked out a one-piece swimsuit with green frills. It didn’t feel all that different from the regular clothes I wore in front of cameras.
‘It should fit roughly, even though I haven’t tried it on.’
“I’ll pay for this one.”
“Yes, that’ll be 89,000 won. If you’d like a refund, you’ll need to bring the receipt with you.”
At last, we finished shopping for swimsuits and headed toward the meeting place Hana unnie had designated.
“We were trying to make memories, but thanks to Dohui, ha… it’s all ruined. Seriously.”
“Exactly…! It’s ruined…!”
The two of them once again became the protagonists of a tragic romance, facing each other and grumbling nonstop.
“How can the youngest never give in to her unnies even once? Seriously.”
“Exactly…! You could give in once in a while…!”
“Ah, come on! Usually the older person is the one who gives in. Why would the younger one give in, huh!? And why are you two complaining when you bought swimsuits similar to mine?”
“There she goes again, nitpicking every word. Geez!”
“Exactly…! She’s always so snippy!”
Eventually, I got tired of dealing with the two of them deliberately fooling around, so I ignored them and kept walking.
“She doesn’t even look at us anymore, does she?”
“That’s right, look at us…!”
“Wow, she’s completely ignoring us. Even her words.”
“Don’t ignore us…!”
“Look, Sera’s becoming terrifyingly scary right now.”
That was something I couldn’t ignore.
“Seriously, this is so lame.”
“She only answers when it’s something like that!”
“Exactly…!”
Seoyun unnie pretended to cry and hugged Sera.
“She’s really so mean. Sera, you agree, right?”
“Exa… th—th-that’s not true, right…?!”
And then the two of them split into opposing factions.
“Ah, Eun Sera. No one would guess you two aren’t a couple, the way you get sick like this again.”
“Dohui isn’t mean!”
Thanks to that, things became a little more peaceful until we reached the meeting place.
The gathering point, which we arrived at after another five minutes of walking.
The members who had gone shopping were loading the van with a mountain of bags.
Oh Hyunsu, our manager, was helping them.
“Oh, I thought we were taking a taxi today. Manager, are you coming to play with us too?”
The manager answered with a smile.
“Come on, do you really think I’d join a group of girls on a trip to a pension? I just came to drop you off.”
“Oh, really? We feel like we’ve gone and bothered you for nothing…”
“Hey~ It’s nothing like that. Even if I stayed at the company, I wouldn’t want to see the higher-ups, and the Inners girls are only practicing today, so it’s fine. It’s better to drop you all off and go out by myself. Now, enough of that—give me your bags!”
The manager snatched the bags from my hands as if stealing them away.
‘By the time he gets back, it’ll probably be time to clock out.’
It was obvious that he had said it that way so we wouldn’t feel guilty, so I thanked him and climbed into the van.
The moment I got in, I heard Hana unnie and Harang unnie criticizing us.
“How are you two later than those of us who went grocery shopping?”
“For real. Which one of you three—Kim Seoyun, Eun Sera, and Lee Dohui—is the culprit?”
Kim Seoyun subtly pointed at me.
“It’s her. Our youngest bunny took forever choosing a swimsuit.”
“I knew it. It’s you again, Lee Dohui!”
Sigh.
I already felt utterly exhausted before we had even set off.
“Would it be me?”
Of course, I was an extremely extroverted person, with an E that came out to around 75 percent on the MBTI test.
But since everyone had a limit to their energy, when I wasn’t working, I needed a quiet refuge now and then.
“‘Would it be me?’ That’s informal speech!”
Of course, it seemed like I wouldn’t get any of that quiet time on the way there.
“That’s, that’s right! Lee Dohui always speaks informally to me too…!”
“When did I? I always call you ‘Yeeun unnie, Yeeun unnie.’”
“You do, you do…!? You always just call me unnie, but then you lecture me with everything you say…! I’m still your unnie…!!!”
So, wanting to avoid the loud voices echoing through the van even a little, I had hoped to sit quietly in the passenger seat.
But I couldn’t.
Chaerin unnie had already put on her headset and taken the front seat.
“Chaerin, where did you say the pension was?”
“Oh, Yangpyeong.”
“Oh~ That’s pretty close.”
As if this atmosphere were familiar to him, the manager entered the pension’s address into the navigation.
I envied the two sitting in the front.
* * *
The commotion of the members woke me from the sleep I had fallen into out of exhaustion.
“Whoa! Amazing! What is this?”
“Is this a private house? Are we the only ones using it!?”
“It’s so pretty…!”
The members rushed out of the van, exclaiming in amazement.
Outside the window stood a luxurious pension that looked like something you would find at a resort.
“Dohui, you’re awake? Get your bags out first.”
Hana unnie spoke to me as she unloaded the luggage.
“Ah, okay.”
“You too! Don’t make the manager carry everything!”
“Yes~”
While Chaerin unnie received the handover from the pension’s owner, the members took the luggage out of the van.
“Thanks. Looks like the leader is the only one who ever takes care of me.”
“Come on, it’s only natural. More importantly, thank you so much for driving us here, Manager.”
“Sure, sure. I should get going now.”
“Already? You should rest a little before you leave. We’ll make dinner, so eat with us before you go.”
“No, it’s fine. I have plans for dinner tonight.”
The manager brushed off our offers, smiled, saying he had to get off work, then drove away.
Naturally, after putting down our luggage, we ran back into the pension.
The pension Chaerin unnie had booked was a private pool villa occupying an entire house.
“Wow, this is insane.”
“I’ve never been somewhere like this before…!”
“M-me neither..!!”
I too wandered around the dazzling interior, checking out every corner.
Then I found a private room that I liked at first sight.
With only one bed, this room seemed like it would let me enjoy the peaceful rest I hadn’t gotten earlier.
“Oh, Hana unnie! Can I use this room? The private one!”
But while I was waiting for Hana unnie’s answer—
“This room is mine now~”
Kim Seoyun came in late and began unpacking in my room.
“Ah, unnie, are you seriously insane?”
“Yes. Next, Dorahee.”
“No, I got here first!”
“No, I unpacked first!”
“Ah, seriously, come on!”
“Come on, what?”
Our fight over ownership of the room intensified when Harang unnie came in.
“Oh, this room smells like mine.”
“What are you doing here, unnie?”
“That’s what I’m saying. Get out for now, unnie.”
Harang unnie ignored us both and boldly flopped down on the bed.
“Oh, it’s so soft. I call it! This is my room!”
The fight among the three of us, tangled together on the bed, continued until Hana unnie came in and pulled us apart.
“What are you, children? Fighting over a room? And Kim Seoyun, Jeon Harang. You two are the older ones, and you’re adults, yet you want to fight with the youngest? With a seventeen-year-old, no less.”
Oh…?
If I played this right—
“Exactly… Hana unnie, I was so scared… Those grown-up unnies were so mean…”
“Lee Dohui, you get out too. I’m just going to make this my room.”
“Ah, damn it, Hana unnie, kick them out first!”
Of course, we were the ones who got kicked out.
The three of us ended up sharing one room amicably.
Anyway, now that we had unpacked, the next thing we had to do was eat.
We headed to the indoor barbecue area connected to the pension.
—Sizzle!
The meat was grilling.
—Bubble, bubble.
Retort-pack stew was boiling.
—Cheers!
The atmosphere was filled with clinking glasses of soda.
—Munch, munch.
And I quietly ate amid it all.
“How can you not even grill meat? No, seriously, how can someone burn meat this badly?”
I even put on a dejected expression.
“I don’t know. Maybe I have no talent… How can I not even grill meat? Phew…”
“It’s okay…! Dohui, ah~”
I also accepted the wraps Sera unnie prepared for me.
“Ah, we really need to send you to a cooking academy.”
So Kim Seoyun stood guard over the grill alone, sweating profusely.
“But why don’t we just order food instead of cooking it ourselves? What are we earning money for?”
“We’re cooking it ourselves right now, aren’t we! Ourselves!”
“Ah, right.”
“Dohui, ah~”
“Hey! Eun Sera! Come over here and grill!”
The Korean beef someone else grilled for me was delicious.
* * *
After dinner, once the members had digested their food, the time finally came.
“It’s a pool party…!!”
“Wow, what is that bikini, Hana!”
“Am I a total hot girl today, Hana?”
“Hana, marry me! I’m not going home tonight!”
The members began changing clothes one after another.
Watching them, I didn’t feel particularly embarrassed.
Honestly, they were just the members in swimsuits.
I had seen them in their underwear at the dorms, too.
‘Besides, seeing my own perfect body is an everyday occurrence.’
Naturally, I was used to seeing other people’s bodies by now.
But there were still quite a few things that embarrassed me.
One of them was wearing clothing I still hadn’t grown accustomed to.
And doing so in front of other people was even more… embarrassing.
A swimsuit itself was a little—or rather, quite a lot—embarrassing to begin with.
Even though it had been quite a long time since I had become a woman.
Even though my physical age was catching up with my mental age.
Yes, it was still embarrassing.
‘It’d be stranger if I weren’t embarrassed. Damn it.’
“Can’t I just not swim?”
“No, you can’t.”
I wanted to avoid it by using the cold winter weather as an excuse, but the interior heating was blasting, and the pool was even a warm spa pool.
I had no excuse left, and in the end, I had no choice but to go into the room and take out the swimsuit I had bought today, buried inside my bag.
“Ah, seriously. How am I supposed to wear this?”