—Now it’s time to smile~
Part One of the awards ceremony, where rookie idols were in the middle of putting on a special stage.
Rira, who had arrived a little later than the other Coral Blue members, sat down in the waiting seats and spoke to me.
“It’s been a really long time. Half a year, maybe?”
In a voice only I could hear.
Though even if she’d spoken loudly, it would’ve been buried under the music anyway.
“Yes, senior. I think it’s been about that long.”
‘It doesn’t feel like that, though.’
We talked so much over messenger that it was hard to tell.
How there were that many songs to talk about, I had no idea.
‘It’s not like she’s on the A&R team.’
But Rira didn’t seem to care, continuing calmly at her own pace as always.
“Our team mainly promotes overseas, so we didn’t really have a chance to meet. Since we’ve been on a world tour, from America to Asia, South America, and Europe.”
Her tone had a certain amount of bragging in it.
So it was better to respond appropriately.
“Yes, you must have been very busy going around on your world tour.”
Our conversations were always like this.
“Seven must have been busy with your Asia tour too, though.”
Rira leading, and me answering.
“Yes, yes. How could we compare to you seniors of Coral Blue?”
And if my answer wasn’t satisfactory, Rira would add one more comment.
“Still, now that fashion week stuff as an ambassador or whatever is over, I’ve got some free time... Let’s eat together sometime when you’re free.”
This, too, was her teasing me about being a luxury brand ambassador.
“Yes, yes.”
Rira probably enjoyed this reaction of mine.
She gave a small snort of laughter and turned her head back toward the stage.
What she said next didn’t suit her.
“Still, I’m jealous. Of Seven.”
“Why?”
Because it sounded a little self-deprecating.
“We’ve never won a Grand Prize. NND swept them all so completely. We should’ve aimed for one when NND was on hiatus, like now.”
Well, if NND had been active all year, there was a high chance we wouldn’t have won one either.
“We’re still only nominees, though.”
“Still, you got number one on the annual chart not long ago. Congratulations.”
What’s gotten into her?
“Uh... thank you.”
Rira nodded and smiled.
“But you know, right? That we won Top Social Artist at the Billboard Awards last week?”
Of course.
I knew it. Someone with that much pride whining like that?
“Yes, yes. Congratulations.”
“I’m kidding. I’m just jealous that you might win a Grand Prize.”
Everything is a joke with her, every time.
It seemed our conversation would end there.
But after a few more stages and a few achievement award announcements passed, she opened her mouth.
“But, junior.”
“Yes?”
“Don’t you feel regretful? Even if you win a Grand Prize, you’ll be disbanding in a few months.”
“—I do.”
It still didn’t feel real yet, but of course I felt regretful.
They were members I’d grown attached to after struggling together for over a year.
“They’re people I like.”
Rira let out a small laugh.
“That’s a cute answer. But that’s not what I meant. I’m asking if it doesn’t feel like a waste for a group with results this good to disband.”
That was a waste too, though?
Even just our third-quarter settlement had been enormous.
If the fourth-quarter settlement came in with my royalties included too...
Wow, Mom, swipe my card!
“I’ll be a little honest.”
Rira picked up the bottle of water in front of her.
“Honestly, our group is recognized as much as we deserve to be, but we can’t even dream of reaching NND. NND gets invited to the Grammy Awards, where fan sentiment doesn’t factor in. In Korea... no, in K-pop, they’re overwhelming.”
Then she opened the cap and gulped it down.
As if she were annoyed.
“But when I listened to your new song, I found myself thinking that if Seven continued on like this, and if Dohui’s abilities grew, you might be able to surpass NND someday.”
“Ah, yes—... heh.”
And then Rira pulled on my cheek.
“Your expression.”
“Huh?”
“Your expression. Something about it annoys me.”
“Eh?”
“Don’t think weird thoughts.”
“Eh.”
Only then did Rira let go of my cheek and continue what she’d been saying.
‘But why does everyone keep pulling my cheeks?’
“Don’t misunderstand. There’s Dohui too, but it’s also because the Seven members themselves are that buzzworthy.”
What, she wasn’t complimenting me...?
Still, it’s true that I’m the prettiest.
“...Your expression.”
“Eh.”
“Never mind. Why am I even having this conversation with a middle schooler?”
“Eh...?”
“I’ll just tell you something fun. Do you know Jin Hyein sitting in the first row over there?”
I did.
She was an actress whose recent drama had become a huge hit, famous for having that first-love vibe.
Was she in her late twenties?
“I do know her, but first, let’s go back to what we were talking about—”
“That Jin Hyein is a complete personality disaster.”
“Oh...?”
“She’s famous among staff for power-tripping.”
“But senior, you do that to me too...”
“The funny thing is, Jin Hyein even tried to pick a fight with me.”
“Ooh...”
“We were shooting an advertisement together, and she deliberately delayed my schedule. A kind of power struggle. Isn’t that fun?”
I nodded.
Gossip really was fun...
But was that Jin Hyein person really that bad?
Even so, Rira was counted among the celebrities’ celebrities in her own right.
“Ah, her boyfriend is a third-generation chaebol. Though it’s basically a sponsorship arrangement. For someone like her, she seems to want to marry up.”
“Oh...”
So that kind of sponsorship really still existed...
“There are actually quite a few people like that among celebrities. Especially actors. Since their class consciousness is so strong, and people like and admire them so much, they start thinking they’ve actually become that kind of person. But people like that, I...”
Rira swallowed her words.
Cheers and applause echoed through the concert hall.
“The special stage is over. I should look at the camera.”
No, that was exactly where it was getting interesting...
***
The MWMA awards ceremony, held over two days, was scheduled to announce two Grand Prizes on the first day.
First was Record of the Year, decided one hundred percent by expert judging.
And the other was the one we were aiming for: Song of the Year in the digital music category.
Naturally, before the announcement of the two Grand Prizes, there were countless performances and awards for special prizes, rookie awards, and best awards.
We also received the Best Performance Female Group award as one of those special awards and gave our acceptance speech to the fans, but the only thing still in my head was the Grand Prize.
‘For now, since our turn is close to last...’
Generally, the later your stage is scheduled, the closer you are to the Grand Prize, so that should mean our chances of winning are high.
And about an hour later, we finally headed backstage to prepare for our stage.
“Wow... You’re really pretty...”
The stylist unnie who was putting on my microphone stared at me.
“Thank you.”
The stylist unnie, who had muttered that quietly, seemed to think she had made a mistake and hurriedly shut her mouth.
It hadn’t been a mistake, and I didn’t dislike it, so I smiled brightly and said thank you again to show that it was fine, then walked toward the stage equipment, toward the lift.
Normally, I would have said a little more so she wouldn’t feel embarrassed, but with our stage coming up, I was a little on edge too.
As I closed my eyes and breathed in, someone grabbed my hand.
“Dohui...!”
When I opened my eyes, Sera unnie was smiling and holding onto me.
“Yeah?”
“Hana unnie says we should do the chant again...”
When I turned around, the members had already gathered in a circle.
“Okay, hands up!”
“We’re doing the chant again?”
“That was before the awards ceremony. This is before the stage.”
“No, but...”
Grumbling a little, I stood beside the members gathered in a circle.
Then the members’ hands stacked one by one in the air.
Of course, there were no moving comments, since we’d already done that earlier.
There was no chant either.
Instead, there was only Hana unnie’s concise sentence.
“Let’s go work hard.”
Suddenly, I remembered the first time I went onstage during my Jeodol days.
Back then, even receiving the gazes of five hundred people had been thrilling, and my heart had pounded as I imagined audiences of one thousand, three thousand.
And before I knew it, now I was standing before tens of thousands of people as a Grand Prize nominee.
Of course, I was just as nervous now as I had been then.
Hana unnie snorted softly.
“Seoyun’s hand is shaking way too much.”
‘Seoyun unnie is still my ideal, though.’
Maybe embarrassed, Seoyun unnie lowered her hand on her own.
“The lift is going up soon!”
Along with that came the staff’s urging.
“Girls, positions, positions!”
We quickly moved to find our places.
At last, the lift beneath the darkened stage.
We stood in place and waited for the lift to rise.
Thanks to the fans’ cheers and murmurs filling the venue, I couldn’t hear the members’ breathing at all.
But the image was already drawn in my head clearly enough that I knew where everyone was standing.
It was a formation we had practiced hundreds of times.
And I took the hand of Seoyun unnie, who would be beside me.
A hand still trembling hard.
When I silently held it for a moment, the trembling in Seoyun unnie’s hand settled.
My own hand, which had been shaking a little, also grew steady.
—Wooooong
Instead, now the trembling of the lift transmitted to me.
And the light from the stage slowly seeped in.
After meeting Seoyun unnie’s eyes and smiling briefly, I let go of her hand.
—Waaaaaaaaah!!
The higher the lift rose, the louder the cheers grew in proportion.
I closed my eyes one last time and erased my expression.
Because the first performance was “Rhapsody,” which would begin with an expressionless face.
In truth, for “Rhapsody,” rather than being expressionless, it was right to wear an expression that held both sorrow and joy.
We had decided on an expressionless face because I lacked the acting ability to convey that.
But today seemed like a day when such an expression would come naturally.
Because it felt strange.
Of course, it still wasn’t a day to get lost in sentiment.
We had 120 days left together.
Still, if I were to let myself sink into it just a little...
Every single day we spent together had been a happy day.
And somehow, I had a feeling today would be the happiest of them all.