“Dohee, fighting! Go ace that exam~”
Manager Dahong had even prepared sticky rice cakes for me. For this, of all things.
“I’ll call you after I get a perfect score. I’m off!”
I took the rice cakes, mimed making a phone call, then got out of the car.
The place I’d gotten out was the parking lot of a high school near Shock Entertainment.
It was the very test site where the qualification exam was being held.
Since it was administered every year in early April or early August, I hadn’t been able to take it immediately after dropping out, and had spent half a year just waiting.
As of today, I would finally become a middle school graduate.
Of course, the results wouldn’t come out for another month.
“Heehee... elementary school graduate.”
Remembering the member who had teased me for being an elementary school graduate made my heart feel terribly petty.
“Huh!?”
Students over there were pointing at me.
Even though I was completely wrapped up in a mask and hat, it seemed my unique aura couldn’t be hidden.
‘Well, with these proportions. This vibe. How could I hide it?’
Of course, conceit was forbidden.
Humility was important toward the fans who always approached me.
“Yes, that’s right...”
“Hey, Hyeona! The cherry blossoms here are so freaking pretty. Let’s take a picture!”
...Sakura?
With my hand floating awkwardly in the air, I naturally caught a drifting cherry blossom and gazed wistfully at the cherry tree, acting as though I were absorbed in the scenery.
‘Early April, when cherry blossoms are in full bloom. What beautiful scenery.’
But the two students were coming toward me.
“Um... a photo...”
I knew it.
“Ah~ Of course!”
I knew they’d recognize me.
I was about to take off my mask.
“Ah, thank you! Hyeona, she said she’ll take it for us! Hurry and stand there!”
The two handed me a phone, then went to stand in front of the cherry tree.
“Ah... You mean of you two.”
“Yes?”
“Nothing...”
Why was I always making myself embarrassed?
After taking their photo, I hurried into the test site, mortified.
At least the distinctive smell of the classroom and the spring breeze gently blowing in through the window put my heart at ease for a moment.
‘It’s only been half a year since I quit school, but still...’
There was something about the atmosphere of a school that made you recover your childhood innocence.
In truth, when I saw unchanging symbols like cherry blossoms and schools,
I sometimes thought I wanted to become a symbol that evoked a certain image too.
Or a medium that made people think of such symbols.
It felt childish and immature, but...
It was also a pure inner desire.
Still, it was somehow embarrassing to admit, so I dismissed it as me getting sentimental because of the spring air and accepted the test papers the proctor handed out.
‘It’s been a year since I last had a test paper.’
And so, I took the exam smoothly all the way through the sixth period.
I’d worried that someone at the test site might recognize me, but it seemed that, too, had been conceit.
I was feeling rather embarrassed about myself today.
‘I’ll have to work hard enough that people recognize me even with a mask on...’
In any case, it seemed my perfect-score record would continue.
Maybe because it was a qualification exam, the difficulty wasn’t very high.
When the exam ended and I returned to the dorm, what greeted me was Sera unni, smiling brightly.
“Dohee~ Did you just come back from your exam?”
Today was a day off.
Most of the members should have gone out to play, so why was this unni alone in the dorm?
“Yeah. What are you doing at the dorm, unni?”
I’d been planning to rest alone, but thinking of Sera unni, who clung to me asking to play whenever she wasn’t spending time on herself, I figured resting was out of the question.
“Harang unni and Seoyun went to a PC café... but I don’t know how to play games...”
“That sounds like those two.”
Lately, Seoyun unni had gotten into gaming.
And not just any game, but League of Legends, famous for being full of veterans.
Harang unni, who liked games, had ended up teaching Seoyun unni.
In fact, gaming was a hobby even the agency encouraged.
“Ah, damn it, what is with this raccoon bastard?”
For a newbie, there was nothing as fresh and different as gaming.
“Aaaah! Unni, this raccoon bastard keeps killing me!”
It was easy to relieve stress in a healthy way.
“Ah, I’m not playing!”
And since you could enjoy it comfortably at home without worrying about scandals breaking out,
I thought there was a reason so many idols enjoyed gaming.
As for me, though, in my previous life, I’d repeated nothing but work and gaming until I got sick of it, so I no longer felt like doing it in this life.
“And Hana unni and Yeeun went to meet friends...”
“Yeeun unni did...?”
That was a bit surprising.
Listening to Sera unni, I went into my room to put down my school bag, but Chaerin unni, who would normally be glued to her bed resting on a holiday, was nowhere to be seen.
“Chaerin unni isn’t here either?”
“Chaerin went to work on music...”
Chaerin unni, who was skilled at playing guitar, was the only member among us who could compose.
She said she’d learned composition as part of the trainee curriculum at the company.
“Ah, really?”
Back when I was a trainee, the agency had suggested that I try taking composition lessons too, but at the time both my singing and dancing were lacking, so I’d wanted to focus my time more.
Above all, with schoolwork and piano on top of everything else, I hadn’t had enough time to learn composition separately.
But lately, I often found myself thinking about trying to learn composition.
“More importantly, Dohee, do you want to make scones with unni...? Unni prepared the ingredients!”
Now that I’d debuted and no longer had school as part of my daily routine,
during inactive periods, aside from days when I had schedules, I actually had enough free time left over.
“No thanks. I’m going to the studio to watch.”
“Chocolate scones... your favorite, Dohee...”
Chocolate scones did sound tempting.
I’d buy some on the way out.
***
Shock Entertainment’s MIDI composition room.
When I entered, Chaerin unni was there, leaning back in her chair in a daze.
And in front of Chaerin unni, on the monitor, a composition software program, also known as a DAW, was open.
Sensing someone, Chaerin unni turned her chair and looked at me.
I’d thought she would be surprised by my sudden visit, but unexpectedly, she spoke in a calm voice.
“What brings you here?”
“What’s with that reaction? Why aren’t you acting surprised?”
“You’re always poking around everywhere.”
...Me?
“I just came to watch... I was curious about how composing works, too.”
“There’s nothing to see right now. I don’t have anything to work on.”
Chaerin unni looked frustrated, as though she was stuck.
“I was about to leave anyway. Nothing’s coming out.”
“Then can’t you just show me how composing works?”
In truth, there was no special method contained in the noun “composition.”
If you picked out the notes you hummed and pasted them together, that was composition.
But of course, everyone knew there was much more to the composition process than that.
First, I’d heard that most songs these days started by building the beat.
You formed the basic skeleton with an attractive beat.
Then placed the topline, the melody line, over it.
You also added the root notes and main chords to match the melody and beat.
And it required skill and understanding in sequencing and mixing.
Above all, making a beat, creating a melody line, and constructing the root notes were not easy tasks.
Modern K-pop composition didn’t simply end with humming.
‘That’s also why more and more composers are forming teams and collaborating to create inventive songs.’
What’s more, there was a saying in the K-pop scene.
Popular music depends on the arrangement.
A good song was captivating with just its melody line.
But a song you could listen to over and over without getting tired of it needed the beat and root notes.
And only when it gave off a rich sound added through arrangement, as well as its own distinctive atmosphere, could it become the best.
‘There’s a reason composers from the hip-hop scene who are good at making beats are doing so well these days.’
I lacked that kind of ability.
Since I’d only played classical music, I was practically clueless about things like beats.
‘If I learn, I’ll have to work hard.’
Moreover, the fact that I’d played countless classical piano pieces absolutely did not guarantee that I could write good melody lines.
It only meant I had a high understanding of sound.
“Hmm... Then should unni show you briefly how to make a beat?”
At the moment, not knowing how to handle MIDI equipment or how to use a composition program was the extent of my understanding of composition.
“Yeah. Show me. I was curious.”
Chaerin unni sat properly in front of the desk, then skillfully clicked buttons with the mouse and added virtual instruments.
She brought in samples, connected them, cut them up, and inserted them.
She cut in certain synth sounds, copied other sounds, adjusted graphs, and tweaked a button labeled “detune.”
She adjusted the pitch of clear, ringing bell-like sounds called chimes and added points of emphasis.
“I don’t understand even while watching.”
“Actually, if you learn things like this from professionals, you can do it in a few months. I’m only doing it quickly because I’m practicing what I already learned.”
They said famous composers could whip up a song in a single day if inspiration struck.
I couldn’t understand how something like that was possible.
“Dohee, you’re good at piano, so if you learn, you’ll get good quickly. Honestly, if you’re good at making melodies, you can participate in composing.”
Even if unni said that, there were clearly more than one or two MIDI buttons I’d have to learn, so it would definitely take a long time to become proficient.
Of course, if I learned, I’d receive lessons from a professional, so I’d learn faster than if I were self-taught.
Still, to learn everything, it would probably have to be after our disbandment next year...
Only after all our activities were over.
“Honestly, I do want to try composing.”
Lyrics, composition, stage performance.
If I became capable of all of that, then perhaps I, too, could become a symbol people associated with K-pop.
In other words, maybe I could become an icon of K-pop.
‘Like GD from my previous life?’
Maybe it was the feeling of being a celebrity’s celebrity.
If I became someone like that, it would be cool.
“But will there be time to learn?”
Chaerin unni gave a small laugh and took out her laptop.
“You can compose on a laptop too. Unni will teach you now and then.”
That would be great.
“So what kind of genre do you want to make? Classical? Ballads?”
Of course, I wanted to try writing piano pieces too.
Sweet, mellow songs were nice as well.
But the song I most wanted to write was...
A dynamic, energetic stage.
A stage that brought exhilaration and shivers.
A song that didn’t get old no matter how many times you listened to it.
A song that breathed new energy into the same old street.
More than anything, a song that made the stage fun.
“A dance song.”
If you thought about it, the reason I’d quit piano and challenged myself to become an idol was actually because of dance songs.
Hearing my words, Chaerin unni nodded.
“Yeah. I figured you would.”
For some reason, it put me in a bad mood.
Lately, the members had been reacting so naturally with, “Because it’s Dohee.”
Why?