It wasn't difficult to figure out that the "few days ago" he mentioned was the day we had discussed my death.
When I didn't answer, Zenon spoke again.
"For a goddess to lend her power, the destructive force certainly makes sense. But power of this magnitude cannot be used without a price."
"Well, this is different from magical power or divine power."
"I do not believe in divine mercy. Gods are fair observers."
It was an uncharacteristically cynical attitude for Zenon. He fell silent for a moment, his brow furrowed as if recalling something, then let out a shallow sigh.
Then he resumed walking.
His pace was significantly slower than Samuel's. As a result, the distance between Samuel and us widened considerably.
"But for Lady Anelli to use power that belongs to a god... it looks quite suspicious from my perspective."
"I told you. I'm accomplishing what I couldn't in my past life."
"Yes, which means the current Lady Anelli might be paying the price that wasn't paid in that past life."
The price not paid in the past life—the destruction of the proxy. That price I couldn't pay because Samuel turned me into a human soul.
However, unlike back then, I'm human now, so my soul should be able to reincarnate.
It's unfortunate that reincarnation presupposes death.
"Are you still keeping Samuel's words in mind?"
"Did you think I'd forget them overnight?"
Zenon's lips curled up as if he'd heard something ridiculous, and he stopped walking again.
He turned to face me, his gaze fixed on my lowered hand.
More precisely, on my hand that had become dusty white from using divine power throughout the journey here.
"I requested materials from the Magic Tower because I wanted to know what could possibly require death as collateral."
Zenon abruptly spoke and slowly reached out his hand. He lightly grasped my dirtied fingertips and raised them.
"My master always emphasized that the Magic Tower is the true repository of knowledge... but I couldn't find even a single clue related to the phenomena Lady Anelli experiences. Dying and coming back to life, conversing with monsters, talking with animals—all of it."
"Well, it is a rare case."
"Indeed. Since you were beheaded and resurrected, I thought I might find information related to miracles performed by gods, but there was nothing. Though if there had been, my master would have sold it to the temple long ago."
Zenon rubbed my fingertip with his thumb. I could see the dirt particles making my skin rough transfer to his hand.
"I wanted to eliminate the possibility of death, but I couldn't find anything."
So that's why his contact with the Magic Tower had increased so much over the past few days.
I wondered if I should comfort him for his trouble, but Zenon continued without waiting for my answer.
"Seeing the power you use today, it wouldn't be strange if the price for this power is death. Honestly, that seems very likely."
Zenon's grip on my hand tightened. It was firm enough that I couldn't pull away.
"...In this situation, it wouldn't seem strange if you died."
He whispered almost inaudibly and pulled my hand toward him. His lips brushed against my dirt-stained fingertips.
His lips, which seemed like they would lightly kiss and pull away, pressed firmly again. This time slightly higher.
Over the ring he had placed on my finger, Zenon pressed his lips like a seal.
"As I said, that might not be the case."
"You hope it isn't?"
With his lips still pressed against my hand, Zenon glanced up. His lowered golden eyes gazed straight at me.
Hope it isn't? Hope that I don't die...?
It's not a problem I can decide anyway, so is there any need to choose one side?
Somehow, if I revealed those thoughts, it seemed like it would only provoke Zenon's anger again. I didn't want to start an argument here of all places, right before the end.
Fortunately, Zenon didn't force an answer and changed the subject.
"I have a question, Lady Anelli."
"Yes."
"How far into the future have you imagined?"
"What kind of question is that?"
"After your resurrection. I'm not asking about imaginations like eating snacks while watching the world end. I'm asking about imaginations regarding the future. It doesn't have to be grand. You know, those kinds of things. What kind of family you might build in a few years, what face you'd grow old with, where you'd live in your later years. Things like that."
It was an abrupt question. So I inadvertently thought about the answer to Zenon's question.
Before my resurrection, back when I was striving to become empress, I had certainly imagined such futures.
'Marriage with Maxel, the imperial grandchildren who would be born between Maxel and me, the Empress's Palace where I would spend my lifetime. All those... everyday things.'
But after my resurrection, I hadn't properly thought about any of it.
I had vaguely imagined distant countries to escape from everything chasing me, but that was about it.
Whether he guessed the implied answer through my silence, Zenon slowly nodded.
"You don't necessarily have to imagine."
"Your imagination would be more interesting than mine."
This conversation was uncomfortable. For some unknown reason, an odd awkwardness arose, and I forcefully pulled my hand free. Zenon let me go willingly.
I could see Samuel, who had fallen far behind, stopping to wait for us.
As I turned to hurry along, Zenon widened his stride and passed me.
"I haven't either."
His muttering in a casual tone was so quiet I almost missed it.
I opened my eyes wide, but Zenon walked quickly ahead as if there was nothing more to discuss.
I, who had been the one trying to hurry, stopped instead.
'He hasn't either.'
...Why?
* * *
Zenon let out a small sigh.
He had ended up revealing fragments of the past he thought he had completely swept away.
It was largely impulsive and unnecessary. He wasn't even a child, yet he failed to control his momentarily surging emotions—what was he doing?
Internally continuing his self-reproach, Zenon eventually kicked open the tent flap and came out.
"Not even a child."
He was already frequently treated as weak, and now he worried he might be misunderstood as being mentally gloomy as well.
'Ah, perhaps it's not a misunderstanding.'
Zenon sat haphazardly in front of the weakened campfire and rubbed his face with his hands.
Ever since hearing Samuel's words, whenever Zenon looked at Anelli, he thought about her absence. About her being gone.
He repeatedly tried to regain his composure, but it was useless.
How could he act normally after hearing something like that?
'And earlier...'
There was no point in continuing those thoughts. It would only make him feel stifled.
Rubbing his face again, Zenon stared blankly at the campfire.
From somewhere in the distance, the cry of some beast could be heard. In the past, he might have been frightened by that sound.
Now... he just felt like it was cursing and mocking him, even if he couldn't understand it.
'Stupid, ruffian, idiot, whatever. I feel like I did something so foolish that even beasts look down on me.'
He must have watched Anelli converse with animals too many times.
"Can't sleep?"
Zenon, who had buried his face in his hands, quickly raised his head. Anelli was coming out, pushing aside her tent flap.
"What woke you?"
"The monsters are being noisy."
So it wasn't a beast crying but monsters being noisy.
Zenon, having learned a fact he wasn't particularly curious about, followed Anelli with his eyes.
Anelli, who had tightly gathered the front of her loosely worn coat with one hand, placed her palm on the ground.
In the darkness, green light rippled and slowly spread out around the campsite.
"Didn't you already kill all the nearby monsters earlier?"
It was Anelli who had turned the land, originally full of disgusting tentacles, into a clearing large enough to fit three tents.
To Zenon's question, Anelli answered slowly.
"There seems to be a territory fight nearby. It would be troublesome if they escape this way for no reason, so I'm leaving strong energy as a threat."
At first she had been cautious, but now she used her power quite naturally.
If the power Anelli used today alone were converted to magic, it would be at a level that would make any mage faint.
Regardless of the amount of magical power, she had used it too ceaselessly and for too long.
With his gaze fixed on the green light, Zenon recalled the day's events. The monsters that touched that light died quietly. They withered without any resistance.
There was no magic that could harvest life so serenely and peacefully.
Of course, he had never heard of such a poison either.
"I'll cast a barrier around the perimeter, so you can stop."
"Your magic is depleting, and my authority is unlimited."
"You said you'd pay the price."
"Yes, that could be."
Hearing Anelli's indifferent voice, Zenon bit his lip. Only now did he see how expressionless Anelli's face looked in the dim campfire.
He had been completely unaware, excited by the fact that his relationship with Anelli had progressed.
He had rejoiced that someone precious had appeared in his life. Intoxicated by that emotion, he had made a grave mistake.
He had thought that because she was someone lenient and soft only toward him, she would come if he pulled.
But that person was not ordinary.
"I was careless."
"About what?"
"About what kind of love Lady Anelli had in the past."
Anelli, who had been concentrating on exercising her authority, raised her head.
A puzzled emotion crossed her eyes as she looked back at Zenon.
"What?"
"It's fine. Even if I cannot become your tomorrow."
Throughout the journey here, Zenon had thought continuously. About Anelli's absence. About a tomorrow without Anelli.
"I will be content with the present."
Anelli's brow slightly furrowed. Having completely lifted her hand from the ground, she stood up as if to approach Zenon.
However, she stopped moving at Zenon's following words.
"If you want to die, then die."
Anelli quietly gazed at him. Zenon did not avoid her gaze.
"If that's more comfortable for you, then you should. How could I stop that?"
Zenon had once heard the conversation between Maxel and Anelli at the artificial pond in the imperial palace.
He had heard Anelli say she might have willingly given her heart to Maxel once.
Anelli, who loved Maxel, had tried to become the perfect empress for him.
And now, she loved him.
Yes, she had loved him.
That was why she was saying she wouldn't harm his tomorrow. Because giving her everything to present a perfect future to the one she loved was this woman's way of expressing love.
While she could casually discard her own future as if it meant nothing.
Zenon's lips curved upward. His mind, trapped in a maze with no exit, finally reached a conclusion.
"I'll just follow you in death."
If she wouldn't come when pulled, he would just follow.