A Disease Where You Die If You Fail to Debut Episode 005
An intro familiar to the entire nation slid by, and a bubbly vocal struck my ears.
I struck the iconic starting pose I remembered.
One of the judges spat out the water they were drinking.
-Ah, me too! I like you~
This beating heart! This feeling~ is like popcorn!
POP! POP!
The bursting beat is ringing out~
This feeling overflowing in my chest!
Cha-cha-cha. The only one seriously nodding at the simple footwork was Young-rin, who had requested the dance. She seemed to be the only pro here.
Slowly, the part where half of my peers could dance came up.
-POP! POP!
You're my Popcorn~ (Oh Yeah!)
My heart
CON CON CON CON
Control it~
The chorus of 〈POP☆CON〉, released 10 years ago by Mallangdalkom, vigorously struck my eardrums.
Also known as a banned CSAT song, it was the culprit that ruined the listening evaluation for test-takers that year with its absurd lyrics and maddening addictiveness.
For reference, I also took the CSAT that year. I couldn't retake it because I had no money.
-POP POP!
Bursting Popcorn~ (Ooh~)
It was also famous for people uploading cover dances, meaning the difficulty was average.
To put it bluntly, it was at a level where even lower-grade elementary schoolers could dance it with practice.
If I had brought this out when it was trending 10 years ago, I would have just been cursed at. But now, I chose it thinking I could somehow tie it in with nostalgia bias and pass it off as a gag.
Of course, I was dancing it as hard as I could with a completely serious face.
Even if others saw it as a gag, if I, a participant, were to do it with a silly smile, it would leave a bad impression.
I had to give the impression that I had worked hard to prepare, albeit within a range I could actually perform.
Of course, it was also true that I actually worked hard. I even leveled up while practicing this. By achieving the 〈First Movement〉 and 〈10 Movements〉 achievements.
Seeing the judges clapping and bursting into laughter, it felt like I might have made a bit of a mistake... but whatever. They'll evaluate it themselves.
After the last move of the first verse, I stopped dancing.
As I gathered my breath and bowed my head, a slightly more composed round of applause came out.
"Thank you."
Young-rin grabbed the mic first, but the one who burst out speaking was the choreographer.
Her eyes were bloodshot from laughing so much. She looked like she had cried from laughing.
"Wow, shi... Ah, I never dreamed that would come out. Weren't you ten years old when Popcorn came out, Mr. Moon-dae? Did you prepare it for a talent show back then?"
"That's not it, but I prepared it because I'm a fan of Mallangdalkom sunbaenim."
"Kha!"
For reference, Mallangdalkom's most recent album release was 4 years ago.
Their prime had passed so long ago that saying a twenty-year-old was a fan made one seem quite peculiar.
It was at a level where even for an idol of the opposite sex, it wouldn't be used as gossip material.
Sure enough, the choreographer who asked burst into laughter again.
Beside her, Moodee murmured in satisfaction.
"Ah... cute~"
"You worked hard, at least you worked hard!"
The male idol judge chimed in.
His expression showed that the doubt that had formed when I said I had no experience earlier had completely vanished.
Only then did Young-rin finally open her mouth.
"That doesn't mean you did well."
I knew it.
It was a situation where a close-up and sound effects would be added in editing.
And that line would probably pop up with a 'Dun dun' in red subtitles three times larger.
I roughly anticipated the editing angle and waited for the rest of the evaluation.
"First of all, it's visible that you lack proficiency when moving your body. Even if you receive a good evaluation with this atmosphere, the future missions will be overwhelming for you."
"I'll keep that in mind."
Not me, but my status window.
Whatever the swallowed words were, Young-rin nodded heavily.
"Right."
Then, relaxing her expression, she added.
"...Anyway, your effort is visible. Good job."
"Thank you."
I feel like I've said "Thank you" about ten times today. I wonder if I'll keep going at this frequency.
As I was gauging that, the judges were exchanging opinions with each other without holding their mics so I couldn't hear them.
Around here, another cruel element of this program emerges.
Here, they rank everyone from 1st to 77th place even in the first evaluation. And they assign seats according to that ranking.
And immediately, using the temporary ranking that comes out right after the evaluation.
And if the next participant does better while the seats are filled, the rankings get pushed down and they have to give up their seats.
It was also this program's trademark to film the scene where the lower ranks get pushed down one by one, sit in last place, and cry.
Fortunately, I don't think I'll end up looking like that.
My ranking is... probably around 24th?
"Park Moon-dae's rank is... 17th!"
Since they over-evaluated me by about 5 places to film a pushing scene, it meant it was actually similar to my prediction.
'I think I went up four or five steps thanks to the atmosphere.'
When time passes and the judges' blinders come off, I might have to hurriedly give up my seat to middle and high schoolers.
It was somewhat funny to be bowing diligently while thinking sullenly.
"Thank you."
"I'll teach you intensely, so raise your rank next time."
The choreographer said with a grin. She would probably flip if my skills didn't improve after this, but I had a status window.
'It would be nice if I could pull off a scene where that choreographer is impressed.'
I bowed my head once more and headed to the set where the seats were placed.
The seats engraved with rankings became larger, fancier, and softer towards the top. The difference was blatantly obvious to the point of being tacky.
The 17th place seat I would sit in was a leather chair that looked like it belonged to a corporate executive.
Upon sitting, a participant sitting in 15th place diagonally across from me greeted me. With a gentle impression, he looked to be around Moon-dae's age.
"Hello~"
"Hello."
"You sang so well!"
"Thank you. You seem to have done well too."
"Huh? Ahaha!"
I couldn't vouch for it since I didn't see it properly, but I meant it seemed that way looking at the ranking, and it seemed to work well.
The participant laughed out loud and pointed at the nametag on his chest.
"I'm Lee Se-jin!"
"......!"
I almost let out a gasp. I answered with the most shameless face I could make.
"I'm Park Moon-dae. Nice to meet you."
"Nice to meet you too~"
Ending the conversation naturally and looking ahead, the next participant walked in with good timing. But I was recalling the name I just heard.
Lee Se-jin.
It was a name that debuted through this program. So, should I say it was a promised network of victory.
But there's a problem.
That guy gets hit with a drug scandal next year after this ends. For distribution, no less.
I clearly saw that name on the 9 o'clock news at a gukbap restaurant near my studio apartment.
[Lee Se-jin from 'Idol Inc.', arrested on charges of drug distribution.]
...I shouldn't talk to him from now on.
Cutting ties was all about timing. Well then, let's use this intermission to check my status window.
[Name: Park Moon-dae (Ryu Gun-woo)]
Level : 5
Title : None
Singing : A-
Dance : D
Looks : C+
Flair : C
Trait : Infinite Potential
!Status Effect : Die If I Don't Debut
Remaining Points : 1
First, points appeared, perhaps because I leveled up from the stage just now. It seems to be thanks to breaking the 〈First Stage〉 achievement.
And it seemed the Dance and Flair categories were also generated from the stage just now.
They were inactive during practice, so do they only appear when officially recognized? I'm not sure of the exact criteria.
Anyway, I had vaguely felt it while practicing... Flair is somewhat acceptable, but it seems 'Park Moon-dae' didn't have much talent for dance either.
If Dance is D, it seems to be around the level of an average person.
I'll probably have to invest points in Dance two or three more times in the future to be able to do anything.
On the other hand, the Looks category showed a new possibility of the status window. Even without investing points, the evaluation went up because I actually took care of my appearance.
It meant I could raise my stats myself, apart from the level-up effects of the status window. A quite positive element.
Lastly, there was another unusual popup floating right next to the status window.
[Successful Stage!]
Impressed the majority!
: Normal Trait Gacha ☜ Click!
'Something weird came out again.'
Still, seeing words like 'Success' and 'Impressed', the nuance of a reward was strong.
Pretending to touch my hair, I clicked the gacha. Then, something quite interesting popped up.
It was a picture of a grey slot machine. The slots next to the already pulled lever were spinning rapidly.
But the speed gradually slowed down. Soon, it reached a point where I could briefly check the contents of the slots.
A few spaces were brass-colored, and most were grey.
[Strong Heart]
[Disgrace Eraser]
[Crocodile Tears]
[Sleep is for the Dead]
[Look at Me!]
[.......]
"......"
No, it's good that I can guess what the traits are as soon as I see them... but aren't the names too crude?
I watched the slot machine with faded expectations. Anyway, it looked like it would stop soon.
Dun dun... Dun!
Flower pollen popped out of the slot machine.
The stopped space was brass-colored.
[Trait Acquired: 'Sleep is for the Dead (D)'!]
When activated, you will not be tired even without sleeping.
Experience acceleration bonus +30% from 00:01 to 04:00
Lasts for one week, one-time use.
"......!"
Surprisingly, a very useful trait was drawn. The name is... a bit much, though.
Anyway, they said 'Gacha', and it meant exactly that. It's funny that even the essential elements of a luck-based trash game came out.
I confirmed that 'Sleep is for the Dead (Inactive)' was added to the trait section at the very bottom of the status window. Let me think about when it would be most effective to use it.
"Participant Kang Min-jo is... 56th!"
The evaluations were progressing steadily.
The debut members other than the suspected drug addict next to me hadn't come out yet.
I watched the next participant come in.
A slender physique with long limbs stepped up onto the stage.
Seeing that he was alone, he was a participant who had no special ties to other trainees.
A murmur spread among the participants sitting in the ranking seats. Of course, it wasn't because this participant came up alone.
"Wow!"
"Daebak."
It was because the participant who entered was incredibly handsome. I even heard a judge exclaiming in admiration openly from below.
"He looks like a deer~"
Even to me, looks at that level meant he didn't have to worry about debuting.
Should I say he was at a level where he didn't even need to come out on a survival show? I was sure he must have done something after this program.
But looking at the nametag on his chest, it was a name I didn't know.
[Seon A-hyun]
To not be able to debut with that face, I wondered if he was severely lacking in skill. He was more handsome than most active idols who sold fan-cam data.
Hmm, if I were to convert it to a status window... wouldn't all his stats except Looks be between F and D?
'If only I could see other people's status windows, I'd know for sure.'
Surprisingly, as soon as I had that thought, a window really floated up next to the participant.
"......!"
Could I see others too?
[Name: Seon A-hyun]
Singing : B- (A)
Dance : A (EX)
Looks : A+ (S+)
Flair : B (A+)
Trait : Tenacity (Inactive)
!Status Effect : Self-Esteem Deficiency.
It was a flashy status window. Enough to think he'd easily make it into the top 10 in this evaluation. Are the ones in parentheses his maximum growth? If so, his future was bright.
But the very last item caught my eye.
[Status Effect: Self-Esteem Deficiency]
With that face? I would have rather understood if arrogance had gone up.
Anyway, being able to check others was a huge advantage. If push came to shove, I felt like I wouldn't starve even if I just clung to an entertainment company.
As I was interestingly inspecting the items, I heard the MC's voice.
"Yes, participant, please introduce yourself!"
And Seon A-hyun picked up the mic.
The hand holding the mic was trembling slightly.
"A-ah, h-hello......"
"......!"
It wasn't a stumble from nervousness. It was an awkward way of speaking to the point of feeling out of place.
It was a clear symptom of a stuttering disorder.
Moreover, I could tell he was very conscious of his speech impediment. Should I say the anxiety and shame hit me as being overwhelming?
So that's why. I immediately understood the status window of this participant, Seon A-hyun.
Still, with this level of looks and skill, he could have digested the stuttering as a narrative, so why couldn't he debut?
As expected, is the status effect 'Self-Esteem Deficiency' the problem? Can I know more details...?
[Self-Esteem Deficiency]
: Despises oneself.
All stats reduced by two levels.
"......!"
A popup suddenly appeared again. To think I could even check detailed items just by thinking about it.
'Very useful, indeed.'
I should check my status effect again and see my remaining lifespan.
I'm being sarcastic, but honestly, I was a bit surprised that the content of that status effect was more extreme than I thought.
If such a debuff were applied in a game, I'd just quit. But unfortunately, it's a life game so I can't reset, so he must be pretty annoyed too.
"A-hyun, by any chance... is it difficult to speak?"
"I... I, I... w-when I was young, I was in an accident..."
"Ah..."
A sob story session was starting on stage.
To be precise, Seon A-hyun seemed to be trying to explain his condition, and the production crew seemed to be trying to make it into a sob story.
Artificial reactions were also bursting out from the participants around me.
Especially the guy who was shaking his head with a tearful face looking very devastated was definitely going to be used as a reaction cut.
Since he was even saying lines like this.
"What do we do..."
Reactions to such sensitive topics shouldn't be approached like that.
Even if it's off by an inch in editing, people will say things like 'Even that kind of reaction is violence.'
I just stared forward with an 'I see' expression without any particular disturbance.
The judges said a few obvious words of comfort and carefully requested the stage.
"Then, A-hyun, can we see your stage?"
"Y-yes..."
The ensuing stage wasn't that bad. Just overall at a level that could be seen as good.
In other words, if the status window was right, he screwed up worse than his own actual skills.
"Seon A-hyun is 18th!"
This is what happens when you lack mental fortitude and strategy. A lower rank than me with that status window.
Anyway, perhaps because his skills felt decent, or because they didn't want to say bad things, the reviews were good.
"You did well~"
"I'll look forward to you in the future."
The judges spouted various warm words. There was even someone giving a thumbs up.
But Seon A-hyun's face, who bowed deeply to greet, was dark.
He came off the stage trying hard to force an expression, and came up to the seat next to me following the MC's guidance.
"......"
I felt like I should greet him...
Seon A-hyun kept glancing at my seat but didn't start a conversation.
It shouldn't come out as a scene where I ignore him.
But opening my mouth was annoying. So I just bowed my head to the side.
Seon A-hyun was startled and kept nodding his head repeatedly.
"The participants to receive the next evaluation are 5 people! Choi Jin-soo, Hong Sung..."
I counted the number of remaining participants inwardly and let out a weak sigh.
There's a long way to go.