- Do you worship me? My god?
Yes, beyond measure. With all my heart and every breath.
- Do you love me?
If this feeling, which cannot be reduced to ash even by the breath of Erebos... is love. Then yes. It is so, without the slightest room for denial.
- How much?
Like this awkward feeling of the corners of my lips loosening whenever I think of your curved eyes, slightly parted lips, secret dimples, chattering whispers, playful laughter, and hunched back—everything related to you... If a possessiveness and desire to own of a depth I have never reached surges faster than the loom of the Goddess of Fate can weave, would you understand?
- ....
It means I think of nothing but you all day, like a madman.
- Ah, that's much simpler. Since when?
To be frank, it has been so since the Star Palace of Lethe.
- You've become a bit more honest. Time truly is the best medicine.
Even though I became a Ketone who kneels so easily because of you?
- But you only kneel for me.
Yes, I begged the Mother Goddess before the eyes of my entire clan. Now nothing is shameful. But more than that, I go this far... until when exactly will you be this cruel to me?
A laugh rang out. No, it seemed like one. This too was, as expected, a terribly lovely dream. Nothing more than an intangible illusion.
His chest began to crumble like a beehive from which all sweet honey had been sucked and discarded. His battered flesh had grown accustomed to hurting preemptively, predicting the oncoming agony.
The whirling petals of Himeros vanished. In the white void where nothing existed, only his shadow remained, sprawled alone.
Already... gone?
Now tears would not flow either. Every drop of moisture in his body had been squeezed out, leaving no wetness left to emerge. He no longer even knew what sorrow was. Such emotions had grown distant like smoke from an altar.
His consciousness blurred gradually, as if sinking into a lake. Even her hallucinated voice came to him muffled, like light beyond a hazy fog.
Is this what it means for the body to turn into a dead tree? All emotions tangled like spiderwebs in lethargy and witheredness, trapped forever inside a cocoon hardened like a coffin.
It seemed he was becoming one with her like this. That, in itself, was not bad.
Even so....
If only I could entwine with her branches like a love vine, and touch her scent, which could be felt even in the flowing sap. If only we could become trees with eyes closed, embracing each other for all eternity.
Perhaps this life wouldn't be so bad either.
Ψ
The hill was covered in white flowers like powdery salt, vibrating with a sweet fragrance. Bees flew among the flower stalks, unable to conceal their rapture, and young spirits sleeping soundly in the earth could not hide the smiles at the corners of their mouths, as if even in their dreams a sweet scent wafted.
"Isn't he sleeping too long?"
- It would seem so.
"Should we wake him?"
- That question alone is a hundred years old. By the time you ask next, won't a far more magnificent structure be built beneath that mountain?
Aseuteil untied the dress bound around her calves, straightened it so that it flowed like water, and stood up.
A garland anointed with the dazzling radiance of Helios, and fabric steeped in the Milky Way, white as milk. Bukpung had presented them as attire that Despoina ought rightfully to wear, and had gone so far as to apply perfumed oil made of Cypriot rose water and thyme aged for hundreds of years, gracefully anointing her neck and limbs.
Her movements possessed an elegance befitting a goddess, yet with a cool aloofness. Bukpung found this unfamiliar, yet satisfying.
Aseuteil walked toward the sacred tree standing tall on the site of the old ruined temple. Amid the piles of stones, the roots of the giant old tree twisted and tangled like hair buried in the earth.
She stood on tiptoe, tilted her head back, and pressed a finger firmly against his body seated on a thick branch.
"Kal...."
In a voice brimming with sparkle, as if it held only the shining powder of stars illuminating the dawn sky.
The face of the god with eyes closed was a little gaunt, yet more beautiful than ever over the passing years.
Tears pooled in his eyes and flowed down his cheeks. Aseuteil's expression darkened.
"He must be dreaming again."
Bukpung sighed pityingly.
- Were we to gather all the tears My Lord has shed over the past thousand years, would they not fill even the Pontus?
Aseuteil reached out and wiped the tears flowing down his cheek. Yet another clear drop fell with a soft pat.
"It seems he dreams of me."
"At times, he has called Despoina's name in his sleep."
And that too in a voice choked with tears. Or while pleading... Bukpung trailed off with a sad face. Unable to continue, he closed his mouth. The noble lord of Lethe. To him, Kallian had been an altar like the torch of Olympus, forever unbroken.
"How on earth can we wake him?"
"You woke him before."
"Back then, all I did was call his name and leap into the barrier, didn't I?"
Aseuteil, who had been crouching in thought before the split tree trunk, sprang to her feet.
She picked up a sharp stone from somewhere and cut her own wrist. Bukpung rushed over in alarm.
- Wh-what are you doing! Why? Despoina, stop! If My Lord finds out... ah, of course, the chances seem slim, but still, if by any chance he does, I'll be beaten against that pillar and sent flying to Tartarus that very day. Or else buried like a corpse in hard red mud together with all manner of filth! You know well, don't you, Despoina? That my sense of smell is no less than Argos's(11). Besides, I have dignity now. I can't let the surrounding spirits see me in such a state!
Argos? No, I didn't know... By the way, do you know Argos's fate when you say that? After twenty years, he ran to greet his master, barely wagged his tail once, and died.
"Bukpung... no one expects dignity from you."
- How can Despoina say such a thing?
"Your master.(12)"
- ....
"And Kallian wouldn't do such a thing. So please, don't work yourself up into a fit beforehand."
- He wouldn't do such a thing? Despoina, do you still not know My Lord? Lord Kallian is only gentle with Despoina! He only dotes on you! Why don't you just admit it already?
"Is there something wrong with that?"
- No, it's not wrong, but....
"Then be quiet."
- Fine.
"See, the wound has already healed."
- Huh? So it has.
"When exactly will you ever hold that tongue of yours... forget it. You truly never change, no matter how much time passes."
- My greatest virtue is that I'm always consistent. Even Olympus weathers away in the wind after a thousand years, but I am the wind, so that won't happen to me. Isn't that amazing? If I meet a bard next time, I want to ask him to write that into my song.
Aseuteil let out a sigh. As expected, talking with him for another hundred years is impossible. No use.
"Wake up, Kal."
Her hand shaking his shoulder grew somewhat urgent. Had she shaken him too hard? Aseuteil paused and pulled her hand away.
"Kallian?"
It was the first time she had seen him furrowing his brow so deeply, even biting between his teeth. A deep furrow like anguish formed on his smooth forehead. He was groaning as if in agony.
Aseuteil looked down at the blood on her wrist. Kallian was, true to a Ketone, sensitive to the smell of blood. So she had thought her own blood would be an appropriate stimulus. Perhaps he might wake.
But it was a futile thought. He had witnessed her getting hurt and breaking too many times. He had even had to endure her death. The sudden scent of blood might instead have turned his dream into a more violent nightmare.
"I'm fine. So don't cry."
It felt as if someone had trapped his soul inside a beautiful statue. How much pain had repeated beneath that peacefully sleeping face?
Aseuteil pressed her cheek against the back of his hand, soaked with tears.
"I'm right here...."
At first, she had intended to wait only for exactly eight nights. Because that seemed fair.
But even on the eighth night, even on the ninety-ninth night, even on the next ninety-ninth night, and the next, and the next, he did not wake.
Of course, according to Bukpung, Kallian had waited for her endlessly, for a time longer than it would take to count every star in the universe.
Aseuteil gazed with sad eyes at the sunlight filtering through the branches woven like a net.
Around them, lush leaves grew greenly on the densely packed branches. Among them hung clusters of ripe red fruit, boasting the blessing of the sacred tree.
Ambrosia... why hadn't she thought of it?
Aseuteil grabbed the tree trunk and stood up. She stretched her arm straight out and plucked the plumpest and most fragrant among the fruits with glistening skin.
Biting crisply into the fruit in her hand, pale yellow juice flowed moistly onto her lower lip and gathered there. A taste both sour and sweetly cloying spread through her.
She caressed his tightly sealed lip line with her hand, as if tracing it, chanting an incantation laden with longing like a whisper. Then she lowered her head and overlapped her lips with his, imitating the way he had once cherished her beyond measure.
The juice she held in her mouth seeped between his lips. It felt as if that alone was not enough. She squeezed the fruit she held against his breath. As the juice dripped down around his mouth, she gathered it with her fingers and pushed it inside.
His thick Adam's apple bobbed with a gulp, swallowing it down.
"Kallian." She whispered as if calling out his soul. Holding his cheek, she kissed him desperately. Come to me now, my god....
At that moment, the long eyelashes that had been closed for distant ages began to twitch faintly. Beneath his eyelids, his eyeballs could be seen rolling slowly.
Startled, Aseuteil stepped back, lost her balance, and fell with a thud beneath the tree. She raised her head from among the leaf piles, staring blankly upward with her chest heaving greatly.
Kallian leaned his body against the tree trunk, squinting at the dazzling sunlight. His amethyst-colored eyes glanced downward and paused.
Beneath the shade where a rain of flowers poured down, she sat with glistening, moist eyes.
Warmth slowly gathered in the gazes that beheld each other.
He tried to say something, then raised his Adam's apple. His vocal cords, locked away for a long time, found it difficult to produce sound properly.
Is this a dream?
His closed lips opened with the sound of breath. He exhaled a low, cracked, and hoarse voice.
"Come here, you."
White petals fluttered down and settled upon his slowly outstretched hand.
The two looked at each other, frozen. Kallian too had a nervous gaze. He stared at her intently, still seemingly hazy.
Is it yet another illusion in a dream? Seeing that his chest did not hurt yet, this dream seemed likely to be quite cruel. Because it resembled her form in his memory to the point of cruelty....
His eyes twitched and widened.
Her small lips held their breath tightly, forming a nervous expression. Pale, as if touched by the breath of Eos.
In that moment, a familiar pounding was heard. Fragmented breathing and a quick pulse. The beating of a heart that had frantically raced whenever it faced him. Her heart was beating as if to burst, just like the day they first met.
A faint tremor crossed the corner of his mouth.
A giant, invisible tapestry unfurled between the two. The picture finally completed by the densely woven threads of fate was dazzlingly beautiful.
Only then did they come to share breaths of the same temperature, hearts beating at the same speed.
"My Anteros."
He whispered tenderly.
"Come to your Anteros's side."
A sob burst forth like a popping water drop. Aseuteil ran toward him with reddened eyes.
Aseuteil threw both arms around his neck and embraced him with all her might. Kallian stepped down onto the ground and lifted her up high into the air. Snowflake-like petals scattered white, as if embroidering the reunion of the two lovers.
Aseuteil, whose lips overlapped with his, met his eyes in the silence where breath was swallowed.
Her eyes shook with surprise. Kallian was looking at her, swallowing a laugh in his mouth.
The smile that had seemed like a bitter laugh soon changed into a slow, eye-crinkling smile. It felt as if her breath would stop. How could even his smiling face be so arrogant and beautiful?
For a long while, she could not take her eyes off him. The same was true for him. The two embraced as if they were one body.
Aseuteil rested her forehead against his chest and asked.
"What kind of dream did you have so deeply?"
"A dream of you leaving me. A dream of you disappearing. A dream of you bleeding and collapsing. A dream of you dying before my eyes...."
She felt as if her heart were being slashed by a knife. It felt as if blood were pouring out only to be crushed like an egg.
Aseuteil looked at Kallian's face. He appeared peaceful, as if accustomed to this degree of pain.
"There is no one else in this world who can break my heart like this and then stoke it again like a furnace."
"...."
"But honestly, if I were to lose you again... I think I would no longer endure it and would become a madman like Nyx."
"That won't happen."
Aseuteil used her fingers to pull Kallian's lip corners sideways. Don't worry.
With his lips stretched, he scoffed and then soon narrowed his eyes. It was rapture just to behold.
"Look. You and me, all of this scenery right now... isn't it too perfect?"
Kallian peeled away Aseuteil's clothes like clouds. Well... must I become intoxicated by the perfect scenery? I want to drink my nectar. His lips mixed with breath, whispering, and headed toward her secret place.
"Here, it seems to be brimming for me."
Aseuteil burst into laughter and pushed his shoulder. But he had already lifted her legs and buried his face there. He began to suckle on the soft flesh. His fingers pressed in as if tasting her depths. A wet sound echoed. He wiped the fluid at the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand and smiled in satisfaction.
Lascivious Eros, my night, my lover.
The shadow of the two embracing each other collapsed with a soft thud into the shade piled with flower petals. An arm pillowing beneath them, they became one. Whenever his warm tongue touched her lowered breasts, moans mixed with laughter leaked out.
Aseuteil raised her insteps and rubbed between his thighs. At her teasing, he burst into a low laugh. It was a baritone so pleasant that even Eos would blush.
From dusk until clouds drifted softly across the dark blue sky of dawn, the two lovers, their naked bodies overlapping, shared passion, exhaling hot breaths.
Bukpung, resting his chin on the treetop and lying prone, exchanged glances with two wind spirits that had approached at some point. Far off, Hestia too was flying over, crackling with sparks.
They sat side by side on the branches and gazed at the stone temple standing solitary in the darkness. For the time being, the hill of Cocytus seemed likely to exude only the thick scent of blooming flowers.
Bukpung smiled contentedly.
As he watched his name carved into the temple pillar sparkle like constellations embroidered in the sky.
— The Daughter of Demeter, Fin.