Damn Idol – Episode 45
* * *
Today’s filming took place in Sangam, and the Coming Up Next dorms were in Pocheon.
Pocheon and Seoul aren’t that far apart, but they aren’t close, either.
So the production staff gave the participants time off on the condition that they return by noon tomorrow.
The show seems way more humanitarian than I expected.
Giving them a break after only a week of practice.
Thanks to that, I…….
“I have nothing to do.”
I ended up with nothing to do.
Uncle Hyeonsu would be at the hospital anyway, and I didn’t want to go to the hospital where my parents were.
They’d been declared vegetative, but since a proper care hospital hadn’t been found yet, they remained there.
I didn’t really have friends in Korea.……
That’s not right.
At this point in time, I didn’t have friends in America, either.
Anyway, the only ones looking for me right now were two shady old guys.
Bzzzt.
[You said today is free time? Want to grab some pork belly and a glass of soju downstairs at the studio?]
[Gijeong-hyung joined too.]
[Aren’t you curious about today’s stage evaluation?]
CEO Lee Hyeonseok and Jo Gijeong.
Wait, but how did the cast members know we’d gotten free time?
I was thinking of just going home and resting.
While I was thinking that, Gu Taehwan made me a surprising suggestion.
He asked me to hang out with him.
I’d talked to Gu Taehwan more than any other Three Months, One Hundred Days member during that time.
But we weren’t particularly close, so why would he want to spend his golden vacation with me?
His stage today hadn’t even been that good; he should go home and practice or something.
I was about to refuse Gu Taehwan’s offer with that in mind, but the words that followed piqued my curiosity.
“I’m going to my parents’ mushroom farm. Want to come with?”
“That’s in Seoul?”
“Yeah. You have to eat anyway, so you can just eat and leave.”
Was Gu Taehwan actually rich?
A mushroom farm in Seoul.
I pondered for a moment, then nodded.
Like Gu Taehwan said, I had to eat, and I was curious.
So I caught a taxi, and somehow Choi Jaeseong joined us too.
At first, he’d asked to be dropped off at a subway station because we couldn’t catch a taxi, but he was hooked by the talk of the mushroom farm, just like me.
Well, if there’s a mushroom farm in downtown Seoul, anyone would be curious.
And the place we arrived at was…….
It was a restaurant.
An enormous mushroom cuisine specialty restaurant in the busy streets of Jongno.
What kind of mushrooms were they selling that the building had three floors?
However, seeing Gu Taehwan’s embarrassed expression, it seemed he’d deliberately phrased it that way knowing we’d misunderstand.
They really haven’t figured out his character yet.
He seems perceptive, but he doesn’t talk much.
“Um, shall we go in?”
I nodded at the words Gu Taehwan offered, still looking embarrassed.
There were quite a lot of customers inside the restaurant, but I didn’t see Gu Taehwan’s parents anywhere.
Gu Taehwan, having secured a table, had only exchanged a few words with some kitchen aunties who seemed familiar.
As we quietly ate our meal after the food arrived, the reason for today’s gathering spilled from Gu Taehwan’s lips.
“My stage today wasn’t great, was it?”
I guess this was what he’d been curious about.
But before I could answer, Choi Jaeseong immediately reacted.
“Come on, hyung, what are you saying. You won.”
“I did win.”
“You won because you did well.”
As Choi Jaeseong said, Gu Taehwan had won against Fade.
To be more precise about the results, Choi Jaeseong and Onsaemiro lost, and the other three won.
But that wasn’t because Gu Taehwan did well; it was because Fade self-destructed.
If Fade was at the level I remembered, Gu Taehwan should have lost.
Oh, or maybe not?
The Fade I remember is from For the Youth, which would be formed two years from now, so maybe they’re not at that level yet?
Anyway, there was no doubt Gu Taehwan’s performance today wasn’t good.
“Yeah. It was pretty bad.”
The one startled by my answer was Choi Jaeseong.
Was it really an answer worth being that surprised over?
The person in question, Gu Taehwan, was calm.
“I really tried hard, so why was it bad?”
“The directing was bad from the start.”
“Huh?”
“The direction CEO Choi Daeho set was terrible.”
Choi Jaeseong flinched in surprise again.
Wait, he’s the youngest, so why is he so lacking in spirit?
Back in my day, I was so infected with the indie disease that when a casting director gave me their business card, I’d quiz them on guitar.
I’d tell them if they could guess the name of the song I was playing, I’d take the card and go to the company.
For the record, no one ever got it right.
Because I deliberately played fifties jazz songs they wouldn’t know.
Compared to the fuss Choi Jaeseong was making, Gu Taehwan was calm.
“Still, it didn’t seem like he was saying anything wrong……”
“Of course the words themselves are right. That man has a very precise sieve.”
“A sieve?”
“If a gem is too small, it won’t get caught in the sieve and will fall through, right? Those trainees all get eliminated. The ones who know how to bulk up enough to get caught in the sieve pass.”
Choi Daeho had taught Gu Taehwan how to bulk up his weight class as a singer.
Expanding vocal range, studying expressiveness, building live performance skills.
He’s not wrong.
If Gu Taehwan practiced like that for a few years, he might be able to show off his strengths after bulking up.
But I tend to think that kind of producing method is a bit irresponsible.
It’s the type where you raise multiple people in a similar way and hope one talented person gets caught.
It’s especially bad for someone like Gu Taehwan who has a clear weapon.
The reason I hadn’t said much about it until now was because I wasn’t responsible for Gu Taehwan’s life.
Telling him to take charge of the intro was the same as telling him to specialize in one part.
If he becomes a master of intros like that, what happens when the Three Months, One Hundred Days project ends?
He could end up as a grotesquely shaped gem that doesn’t fit any idol group.
Of course, with time, he could grow while maintaining his strengths, and that would be more efficient than Choi Daeho’s method.
But I had no reason to get that involved in Gu Taehwan’s life.
When I explained my thoughts, Gu Taehwan tilted his head.
“Aren’t you looking too far ahead?”
“What do you mean?”
“Right now, my assignment is to do well in Three Months, One Hundred Days. If there’s a way to do that well, shouldn’t I just do it first?”
“……You have a point.”
I do have a habit of looking far into the future.
But soon I grew curious.
Was Gu Taehwan saying that sincerely?
“You trust my words that much even though we’re fellow participants?”
“Because you’re good. Extremely so.”
“And you don’t feel jealous?”
Once again, the one who made a fuss was Choi Jaeseong, who’d been listening from the side.
“Wow, hyung, you’re really……. Like a genius.”
“You mean I’m obnoxious?”
“Just a little……?”
“I asked Gu Taehwan, so you stay out of it. How about it?”
Normally, I wouldn’t ask this kind of question.
But as I’d resolved while talking with Onsaemiro last time, I’d decided to spend this life fully as this life.
I’d decided to faithfully play the role of a discarded episode.
That’s why Gu Taehwan piqued my curiosity.
Because he’s someone with a talent in an area I don’t have.
“Of course I’m envious.”
“…….”
“I do want to do it like you, but I don’t think I can go that far? Is this jealousy?”
Something about the way he talks is strange.
Gu Taehwan may be sparing with words, but he’s pretty smart.
Looking back now, he seemed embarrassed even back when he was acting like an ‘I’ll work hard’ bot and following me around.
He probably thought his own actions were absurd.
Well, I thought he was a weirdo back then too, though.
Anyway, I don’t know why this smart guy is talking like he’s broken.
The one who gave me the answer was Choi Jaeseong.
“This hyung, I don’t think he knows what jealousy is?”
“No, I know. You feel envious, you want to follow, you want to surpass.”
“What are you talking about. Jealousy isn’t an emotion that raises me up; it’s an emotion that wants the other person to come down. Well, it does take some time to reach that point, though.”
“…….”
This time, I was surprised by Choi Jaeseong’s expression.
He’s exactly right.
It’s not something you can easily say without experiencing it.
Seeing Choi Jaeseong’s expression suddenly turn bitter, he seems to have some experience with it.
“If jealousy is that kind of emotion……. I don’t think I’ve ever felt it?”
I smirked at Gu Taehwan’s words.
I don’t fully believe those words, but I don’t dismiss them either.
Because there was a guy in GOTM who said something similar.
“Fuck, I’m a guy who’s never been jealous of anyone even once!”
Guitarist Dave Logan.
“Yeah, if that’s the case, then I can help you out comfortably too.”
“What about CEO Choi Daeho’s directing?”
“Ignore it. Anyway, once you’re a company CEO, they’re all results-oriented. As long as the results are good, it doesn’t matter.”
“Sion-hyung, since we’re talking about directing……. Do you have any thoughts on the self-producing mission?”
Now I could finally see both their intentions.
Gu Taehwan had lured me to the mushroom farm to resolve his own curiosity, and Choi Jaeseong had tagged along because he wanted to talk about producing in the end.
“It’s not that I don’t, but I need to hear what the members think, right?”
“We’re members too, aren’t we? Can you share just a part with us?”
“What are you worried about?”
“Um, I was worried you might do it like your stage, hyung.”
“Under the streetlight?”
“Yes. Honestly, I’d heard the song so much during practice and rehearsals that I thought there’d be nothing surprising……. But you completely tore it up on stage. I was worried you might want to do something like that again.”
“Don’t worry. I won’t.”
This time, I’m going to put on a perfect idol stage.
I showed off my skills once; that’s enough.
In this life, my goal is to be a K-pop idol, nothing more.
Choi Jaeseong’s face brightened.
“Right. Hyung, how was my stage?”
“It was fine. Except your live was a little unstable.”
Choi Jaeseong is the most well-rounded among the Three Months, One Hundred Days members.
He has no glaring weaknesses and plenty of moderate strengths.
The problem is that it’s hard for him to become the protagonist, and he’s the type to easily get exhausting when digesting a whole song…….
This isn’t something you can really feel through words.
The time will come when he feels it himself.
While we were having that conversation, a middle-aged woman approached our table.
“Son!”
It was Gu Taehwan’s mother.
Choi Jaeseong and I got up to greet her, and we ate until our stomachs were ready to burst from the endless food she brought us.
After that, we did some busking on the street to help digest.
It wasn’t my idea; it was Choi Jaeseong’s idea after hearing there was a guitar in Gu Taehwan’s room.
We didn’t sing; I just played guitar accompaniment, but more people gathered than expected.
Well, to ordinary people, Gu Taehwan and Choi Jaeseong were more than skilled enough as vocalists.
Then some man approached us and handed over his business card.
“Could we talk for a moment?”
Funnily enough, he was a casting director for Double M Entertainment, Dropout’s agency.
It reminded me of the old days, so I joked around.
“If you guess the name of this song.”
So I played some fifties swing jazz.
“Isn’t that Count Basie’s Dear?”
……What the hell, this guy.
He guessed it right so quickly even though I was playing a piano piece on guitar.
I eventually told him the truth, but the casting director forcibly stuffed his business card into our pockets.
“You might have reason to contact me after Coming Up Next ends, right?”
Well, I suppose that could happen.
If it’s Double M, they might be able to negotiate with Ryan Entertainment and take in a trainee.
After that, we performed a few more songs and wrapped up the busking.
“Ah, that was fun. Sion-hyung, is there any song you don’t know? And you play guitar well too.”
“I know most pop sheet music. I can play K-pop more or less similarly too.”
“Wow, a total talent bug.”
“You calling me a bug?”
“……See you tomorrow! My mom’s going crazy telling me to come home!”
And so we scattered to our respective homes.
Well, it wasn’t exactly fun, but it wasn’t a bad day.
[We’re still drinking, want to come even if it’s late?]
[We’re moving from Hongdae toward Sangsu now, so I’ll leave the address. Where we’re going is…….]
At least it seemed more fun than a drinking session stuck between Lee Hyeonseok and Jo Gijeong.