“Oh, right. A new tutor for Miss Amber arrived a month ago.”
Aide Paul spoke to Count Conner.
“However did you manage that?”
Conner’s voice was indifferent as he spoke without lifting his eyes from his documents.
“She’s from the outskirts of the capital.”
It carried the implication that she was from a remote, backwater region in the northeast where news traveled slowly.
“Hmm.”
“You should greet her at least once.”
“Must I? Who knows how long she’ll last.”
“According to the servants, the tutor is a herbivore.”
“A herbivore?”
Conner lifted his eyes from his documents and looked at Paul, who was smiling broadly.
“They say she has a docile disposition and doesn’t get angry easily.”
One would need at least that kind of personality to remain by the side of a mother and daughter with such foul tempers.
Thinking that the tutor, whom he had yet to meet, was in the same boat as him, Paul already felt a sticky sense of camaraderie.
“She’s lasted a month. So you should at least familiarize yourself with her face. Don’t anger the hard-won tutor by mistaking her for a maid again like last time.”
“It wasn’t a mistake.”
“I know. That she was hovering around you on purpose to seduce you. But couldn’t you have pretended not to know and endured it?”
“Why should I?”
“Tutors are already hard enough to find. There’s no need for you to lend a hand in driving them away.”
“Oh ho, you’ve gotten quite bold? Calling me out so openly.”
Conner narrowed his eyes.
“What do you mean? Absolutely not. I am merely offering sincere advice for the peace of the ducal household.”
It had already been ten years since Paul had served as Conner’s aide. He possessed enough trust that he could say things anyone else would be fired for muttering.
“Hmph? Sincere advice?”
As expected, Conner scoffed, but he did not look angry.
“Also, the doctor said that since it’s spring, you should increase your time walking outside in the sunlight and exercising.”
Paul gave his attention to Conner, seated in a wheelchair.
Having been cooped up indoors, he hadn’t seen sunlight, so his face was devoid of color.
His pale face made him look frail, but he had once been the commander of a knight order assembled to subjugate monsters. He had even been granted the title of Count by the Emperor for that merit.
He had a good frame, and though he looked thin, his well-trained body was covered in lean muscle. He was strong enough to push his own wheelchair.
He had injured his legs in a carriage accident three years ago, but the external wounds had been cleanly healed with healing magic. However, rehabilitation training was needed to restore strength to his muscles.
Despite his exceptional athleticism and the fact that he could walk well enough with training, Conner had decided not to walk. For the absurd reason that it was too bothersome.
It wasn’t his legs that were broken, but his heart.
“Your nagging is getting worse.”
Conner said, sounding annoyed.
“You are a patron who pays generously, after all. I intend to remain by your side for a long time. I can’t have my livelihood cut off because your health deteriorates. Especially since a child will be born soon. Children grow up so fast.”
“I see. Children do grow up quickly.”
“So has the young lady. She’s grown another handspan in that time.”
“A handspan?”
When had he last seen his daughter?
Conner recalled the last mealtime when he had seen Amber.
Had it been last winter?
Since it was the season when spring flowers budded on the branches, it had indeed been a long time since he had seen Amber.
“You should call in some courtesans and take care of your pent-up needs as well. Are you planning to become a monk? If you dislike women, shall I find you some male courtesans instead?”
Paul’s voice was steeped in pity.
Did he no longer even have a sex drive?
Perhaps due to the trauma of his cheating wife, Conner had grown increasingly indifferent even to basic desires.
And he was not yet even thirty—an age when one’s libido should be in full bloom.
“I’ll take care of my own libido, so you go and please your own wife. Don’t end up like me.”
Conner’s lips twisted as if mocking himself.
Though Paul often cursed his boss for his usual nasty temper, his chest ached whenever Conner made an expression of self-loathing.
The ones who had committed the wrongdoing were his cheating wife and his half-brother. But due to his perfectionism and his prideful nature, Conner constantly tortured himself.
Believing himself to be a man so inadequate that his wife had cheated.
Thus, Conner had covered up their deeds, and only a handful of people knew about it. Paul was one of them.
They were dead, but Paul sometimes thought death was not a sufficient price for their sins.
Instead of them paying the price while alive, the living victims had been trapped in a quagmire of suffering, unable to free themselves.
The most pitiful among them was young Amber.
“The young lady has done nothing wrong, has she? She is your only daughter. Please do not treat her so coldly.”
Amber was the daughter of the late Countess, but she was also his daughter.
And in that regard, Amber took after her father, Conner, completely.
If things continued to drift apart like this for several more years until Amber came of age, their relationship would be irreparable. Paul was distressed at the thought of Conner losing his daughter as well.
“Enough. I don’t want to hear it.”
At that voice filled with a chilling frost that seemed capable of freezing the surroundings, Paul closed his mouth.
It was no exaggeration to say that the secret to Paul’s survival as the aide to the difficult Conner all this time was knowing exactly when to speak and when to stop.
Paul quickly changed the subject to a safer topic.
“Oh right, the doctor said that the longer you delay rehabilitation, the harder it will be to walk.”
“That fellow never says a word to my face. Why does he always say these things to you?”
“Because I’m the punching bag.”
Conner snorted at Paul’s words.
“And……”
“You still have more to say?”
“The tutor dines with the young lady in the dining hall every time.”
“Every time?”
Conner’s eyebrows rose.
After the carriage accident, Conner had resigned as commander of the knight order and returned to his estate. Since then, he had not stepped foot outside the mansion.
The Duke, who held a high position in the imperial palace, spent much time in the capital, and Conner had busied himself with paperwork in his office, learning the affairs of the territory his deceased half-brother had managed.
He had only begun going out little by little for territorial management at the end of last year. This month, there had been matters that needed resolution, so Conner had gone out unavoidably and returned yesterday.
The Duchess, whom the Duke had taken as his second wife, had gone up to the capital long ago, so it seemed the tutor had been the one dining with Amber all this time.
Barring anything unusual, Conner would not leave his room and office as he had done until now, but it seemed proper to at least show his face once.
“Tell the butler. I will take breakfast in the dining hall tomorrow.”
“Yes. I shall relay the message.”
Paul was greatly satisfied. A proud sense of satisfaction welled up in him at having protected Conner’s humanity, which had been steadily fading.
2
“‘I have come to keep my promise, my lady. Allow me to introduce myself once again. I am Count Andrei.’ Andrei pressed his lips to the back of Stella’s hand, the princess who bore the ignominy of being cursed because of him. ‘I knew you would keep your promise.’ The two shared a kiss that completed the vow they had made when they last parted. Around them, streams of light danced beautifully.”
Having read the storybook with great emotion, Elin closed the cover.
Her expression was full of regret. All-ages novels had the advantage of making one’s heart flutter incessantly instead of containing intense erotic scenes that made one’s heart pound.
But Elin’s emotion did not last long.
“Why does the princess have to wait? She could just go find Andrei herself.”
Amber’s listless voice ruthlessly shattered the emotion that had found its way to Elin.
“Because she’s a princess. For an honorable marriage, Andrei—now a count—must be the one to propose.”
“Anyway, the princess is the sole heir of a grand ducal house. She could inherit the title of Grand Duchess and propose to Andrei first.”
“Yes, that’s true. But this is a story. A love story, at that. It was written to exude the most romantic feeling possible. So take the story as just a story. Otherwise, life will be quite dull.”
Don’t children this age usually like love stories with princes or knights?
But whether Amber was too precocious or simply had unique tastes, she simply couldn’t take an interest in them.
“I don’t understand why those stories are fun. I’d rather read a history book than listen to something like that. Please finish reading the History of the Fedo Kingdom that we left off yesterday.”
“Haha, yes, history. History is interesting too.”
Amber was a growing child; there was no need for her to escape into the unrealistic world of novels to forget the harsh realities of life.
When she got older, she would naturally seek out comfortable books to clear her mind without a thought.
“Amber likes ancient history.”
“History reveals the rise and fall of kingdoms. The key to rise and fall is people.”
“People?”
“Whether the ruler is wise or tyrannical. Whether the ministers standing beside the king are loyal or treacherous. It seems different, yet it is always the same. Corruption brings ruin.”
Amber couldn’t read due to dyslexia, but her reading comprehension level was higher than her peers. Especially regarding history, she possessed greater knowledge and insight than Elin, her tutor.
Because she had to read ancient history to suit her student’s tastes, Elin was inadvertently studying hard.
In doing so, she realized for the first time how incredibly difficult it was to read aloud to someone.
Ancient history contained many unfamiliar names of people and places, so unless she reviewed them beforehand, she would often stumble while reading.
She clearly knew what the letters were, but smoothly reading unfamiliar words was incredibly difficult. Because of that, she had been corrected by Amber several times.
She wasn’t upset. It was due to her own lacking knowledge. Elin knew her place and was humble accordingly.
The funny thing was that while history books were boring enough to make one yawn, when Amber summarized them, they became easy and interesting. It almost felt like Elin was the one being read to.
No wonder her command of language was excellent despite being unable to read.
Elin thought that with this level of intelligence, Amber should be able to overcome her dyslexia.
If she met a competent teacher.
“Amber, don’t you want to go to the Academy?”
There would surely be teachers there who could cure her dyslexia.
One needed wealth to attend the Academy, but that was not a problem for this household.
“I don’t.”
Amber said flatly.
“Why? You could fix your dyslexia there. You’d be able to read whatever books you wanted, whenever you wanted. There are also friends your age at the Academy.”
Elin recalled her days at the convent. Though she had felt stifled being confined in a remote place, she had many fun memories because of her friends.
“Did the Duchess tell you to? To coax me into sending me to the Academy?”
Amber reacted sensitively and glared fiercely at Elin.
“No, why would the Duchess?”
“I’m never going. Let’s end today’s lesson here.”
Amber slammed the study door and left.
Something felt off.
Elin tilted her head. She thought, oh, it was because Amber had severe dyslexia.
But why did it feel as if it wasn’t that she couldn’t read, but that she wasn’t making any effort to learn?
Amber clearly had a strong desire to learn. So much so that she often found Elin’s reading frustratingly slow.
With Amber’s impatient temper, she should have been desperate to learn letters just to avoid the inconvenience.
Then why did she hate learning to read?
Questions she had never considered before swirled in Elin’s mind. It seemed she would have to write to her master after a long while and ask.
***
Next day.
On her way down the stairs to eat breakfast, Elin ran into Amber.
The morning sunlight streaming through the window seemed to shine only on Amber. Amber’s insane beauty shone even brighter in the morning.
Swish—her eyes were being purified.
“Amber!”
Overcome with happiness, Elin greeted her in a bright voice and hugged Amber tightly.
“Ah, seriously. I told you not to hug me.”
Amber showed disgust, but Elin easily ignored it. She knew that no matter how fiercely Amber spoke, she never pushed her away.
While working as a tutor, Elin had realized that young children needed affectionate physical contact.
Noble families seemed to think that while children were lovely, expressing too much affection was unaristocratic, but Elin believed that was a culture that needed to change.
It was especially necessary for a child with a nasty temper like Amber. No, perhaps it was the lack of hugs that had made her temper so nasty in the first place.
Elin knew from experience that hugging such children every day made their personalities gentler.
Amber’s mother had passed away early. So Elin had resolved to hug Amber as much as she could while she was here.
“Our Amber is so pretty today too. Isn’t it a beautiful morning?”
Elin subtly took Amber’s tiny hand and walked to the dining hall. Amber made a face showing displeasure, but she didn’t pull her hand away.
Having done this every day for a month, no matter how much she was bullied, Elin had persevered; perhaps Amber had given up resisting.
“You must be happy, teacher. The whole world must look beautiful to you.”
“The world isn’t entirely beautiful, but you can choose to see only the beautiful parts. That’s good for your mental health, Amber.”
Just like me.
Elin maintained a healthy mind by choosing to see only Amber’s beautiful qualities.
“It certainly seems so. Perhaps because you live with your mind half-empty and sleep well, your skin is ‘very’ good, teacher. What a relief. At least your skin is good.”
What an outstanding linguistic sense, almost bewitching.
A dim-witted person wouldn’t catch the sarcasm that sounded like praise at first glance.
“Thank you for the compliment.”
Amber looked pitifully at Elin, who was beaming beside her.
After observing her for a month, the conclusion was that the tutor was consistently a fool.
That was why she smiled like that without even realizing she was being insulted.
Yet she still said whatever she wanted. Her insides were completely visible, and she was consistent through and through, so there was no need to calculate hidden intentions while listening. Perhaps that was why Amber relaxed when talking to Elin.
Elin frequently hugged Amber, stroked her head, and held her hand.
Unaccustomed to physical contact, she had been very awkward at first, but honestly, she didn’t hate it. On days when she had bad dreams, Elin’s hugs noticeably calmed her heart.
‘Fools aren’t so bad, either,’ Amber found herself thinking before she knew it.
Especially, Elin was a good companion for meals. No matter how precocious she was, Amber was still a child. She hated eating alone in the spacious dining hall.
Except when her grandfather, the Duke, was present, Amber usually ate alone. The Duchess slept in in the mornings, ate lunch in her room, and spent evenings at parties.
Her father might not eat even once unless her grandfather called him several times. The previous tutors had grown tired of Amber’s verbal abuse and chosen to eat alone in their rooms.
But Elin was different. From the very beginning until now, she had consistently eaten with Amber.
Amber had now decided to acknowledge that Elin possessed nerves of steel, unmoved even by her most caustic remarks.
Bright by nature, Elin always chattered away like a lark, and perhaps because she loved storybooks, she spoke with real flavor.
So if Amber relaxed even a little, she would find herself spacing out and getting drawn into Elin’s words.
She had to stay focused today.
Amber entered the dining hall with a firm resolve.
They sat down. Normally, a maid would bring the food immediately, but today the butler entered unexpectedly.
“The Count will be dining.”
So suddenly?
Without any prior notice?
Elin, and of course Amber, were flustered and quickly rose from their chairs.
Since Elin had come to this house, the Count had never once eaten in the dining hall.
According to Lisa, after injuring his legs and being confined to a wheelchair, the Count lived a semi-reclusive life, never leaving his room and office.
The sound of wheelchair wheels rolling was heard, and soon Conner entered the dining hall.
Good heavens.
Upon seeing Conner’s face, Elin covered her mouth with her hand. She was afraid she might gape with a foolish expression.
Today she finally learned who was responsible for Amber’s insane beauty. Amber had been carved straight from her father’s face.
Fine platinum blond hair, straight thick brows and beneath them, slowly moving eyelids, long eyelashes cradling dreamy purple irises, a nose bridge that jutted out sharply as if sculpted, sultry wine-colored lips, and yet a jawline that looked ruggedly masculine.
His face was like a statue carved by a master artisan.
To think a man with such a face truly existed in this world.
She couldn’t tear her eyes away from that flawless face. It was breathtaking.
Perhaps because he stayed only in his room, his face was gaunt, his skin so pale that veins were visible, exuding a melancholic aura.
Was that why? He radiated a mystical beauty that seemed otherworldly.
This man was truly a fairy. Or to be more precise, he gave off more of a black elf vibe than a white elf.
Even though their faces were similar, the feel was completely different between a child and an adult man. Conner had a sexy face that oozed sensuality befitting an adult.
Why on earth was he living in seclusion? He should benefit the world with that beautiful face.
Because of his injured legs?
With a face like that, what difference did it make if he couldn’t walk?
Elin’s heart pounded and her face flushed, shocked by his otherworldly beauty.
Would she even be able to eat breakfast properly?
“Hello, Father?”
Amber greeted Conner in a shy voice.
Huh? Why is she acting like that?
With her venom removed from her eyes and voice, Amber was imitating a young lady of her age.
No. Was that what normal looked like?
“It’s been a long time.”
It was a pleasant, heavy low-pitched voice, but cold and dry.
As expected of the father of that daughter, his indifferent gaze was identical. Amber really had inherited everything.
Couldn’t you have just skipped the bad parts, Amber?
But one thing was certain: even so, the Count was the very epitome of perfect beauty, the kind for which anything could be forgiven.
“It is an honor to meet you, Count. I am Elin Campbell, the tutor.”
Determined to exchange even a single word with the beautiful man, Elin gripped her pounding heart and offered her greeting. No matter how hard she tried, her voice kept trembling.
“I leave my daughter in your care. Let us eat.”
The atmosphere made it clear no further conversation would be tolerated. She felt an oppressive pressure that weighed down upon those around him.
Completely intimidated, Elin quietly picked up her fork and knife. Only the clinking of tableware rang out in the dining hall.
Elin, who struggled with heavy and suffocating air by nature, opened her mouth to break the awkward atmosphere.
“Amber is remarkably bright for her age. Her level of book selection is quite high.”
Praising a child to the parent was the best approach.
Unlike usual, Amber watched her father’s reaction with bated breath, nervous. It was unexpected to see Amber—who usually acted like she could steamroll the world—so wary of her father’s mood.
Amber, you’re just a normal child in front of your father too. You even know how to be nervous.
Seeing Amber acting like a child filled Elin’s heart with emotion.
Conner’s gaze languidly swept from Elin to Amber and back to Elin.
“Compared to the infants you have taught, she may appear clever. I do not expect much from you. Please teach Amber at least how to converse normally with others.”
He truly was Amber’s father.
Even as an adult, he had wrapped the message “I know you lack skill” in more sophisticated language, delivering it as a veiled insult.
The aura of an impenetrable man wafted from him.
Gasp! He really is exactly my type.
Elin stopped breathing, her face turning pale as she wrung the hem of her skirt.
***
“Elin, this is bad. Get a hold of yourself.”
After breakfast, the image of the Count with his heavenly beauty continued to spin before her eyes as if etched on her retina. Elin’s heart, which had been pounding since the meal, was still racing.
If she read ancient history in this state, she would surely mispronounce difficult names of people and places. Then she would have to endure another long, scathing lecture from Amber.
No, I need to get a hold of myself.
Elin muttered to herself all the way to the study, trying to control her mind. She didn’t want the emotion of seeing the Count to be shattered by Amber’s scolding.
But the moment she entered the study, her half-successful mind control shattered. The daughter, who was the spitting image of her father, was inside.
Oh no, this is troublesome. Would class even be possible today?
The world seemed to turn yellow, and Elin stopped frozen in front of the door. She figured she’d come to her senses only after hearing Amber’s sneering remark: “What are you doing standing there like an idiot?”
But the expected verbal abuse did not come.
Huh? Why is it quiet?
Only then did she notice Amber’s unusual expression. Amber, who always wore a cold and haughty expression, looked depressed.
“Amber, what’s wrong? Are you ill somewhere?”
Amber sometimes suffered from headaches. When that happened, she became less talkative.
“Father has no interest in me.”
A fleeting look of longing and resentment crossed Amber’s face.
“How could that be? Why would he, when his daughter is so pretty and smart?”
“I’m not pretty or smart. You’re just ugly and stupid.”
Amber shouted, clenching her fists.
“Ugh, my head hurts.”
Amber sank into her seat, holding her head with both hands. Her face was so pale it was almost blue.
“Amber, let’s go to your room and lie down.”
Elin supported Amber and took her to her room.
***
Elin sighed and leaned back on the sofa. She had just returned to her room after checking that Amber had fallen asleep from the medicine.
“Lisa, bring me a cup of tea please.”
“Yes, teacher.”
Even Elin, who had never known headaches in her life, felt her head ache.
When Amber first said she had headaches, Elin had thought she was faking.
What child gets headaches?
But Amber truly suffered from terrible headaches. According to the doctor, they were stress-induced headaches.
It was absurd.
She had never seen a young lady who lived as she pleased like Amber. She said whatever she wanted and didn’t do what she disliked.
As the Count’s only daughter, she should have been receiving lessons to become the Duke’s heir, but they didn’t push her too hard, citing her dyslexia.
Her study schedule was also at Amber’s whim. No one interfered with Amber.
And yet, stress-induced headaches?
Elin had thought Amber was so domineering because there were no adults to interfere. But today she realized that “no one interfering with Amber” meant indifference.
Perhaps her personality hadn’t been twisted from the start.
Could the environment have made Amber into such a cynical child?
To consult about Amber’s dyslexia, Elin had exchanged letters with her master several times. After conducting a few experiments, her master had replied that it could be due to psychological factors.
“I really am unqualified as a teacher. To think I’ve been receiving excessive treatment and pay without properly looking after the child.”
She felt so sorry for having considered Amber’s pretty appearance and outwardly nasty attitude as the whole of who she was.
She might lack skill and be unable to teach studies well. But looking after a child’s heart was something she could do with just a little attention.
Her master had taught her that sometimes caring for the heart was more important than imparting knowledge, but she had forgotten that.
Where should she start?
Elin thought in turn of the Duchess and the Count, the adults of the ducal residence.
“Did the Duchess tell you to? To coax me into sending me to the Academy?”
“Father has no interest in me.”
Anger. Depression.
“I’m not pretty or smart. You’re just ugly and stupid.”
And anger again.
Elin recalled what she had learned at the convent.
Anger is the strongest expression of emotion. She had learned that not only when one is furious, but unexpressable emotions like depression, anxiety, and fear can also manifest as anger.
The anger Amber showed could be a surface emotion. Her usual caustic remarks could also be a defense mechanism.
If it was a defense mechanism, it meant Amber’s inner self was actually very fragile.
What was it? What emotion did Amber harbor?
What was hurting Amber?
Just then, Lisa entered with a tea set. A fragrant lavender scent rose.
“Lavender. It smells good.”
Elin inhaled the tea aroma. The fragrant scent alone made her heart feel at ease.
As Lisa poured tea into a pretty glass teacup, purple lavender bloomed in the cup.
“Do you like it?”
Lisa’s eyes sparkled like a child seeking praise.
“Of course. And these are madeleines. They’re your favorite, aren’t they? Sit down and eat one.”
Elin handed Lisa one of the madeleines that had come out with the tea.
“Thank you.”
Lisa, who had been awkward at first, had become quite comfortable sitting and eating dessert.
During such times, they would chat about this and that, and the cheerful Lisa was well-informed and a delightful conversation partner.
“What kind of person is the Count? Apart from being handsome.”
“Anyone who isn’t blind can see that the Count is handsome.”
“Ahem, true.”
Recalling the handsome Count’s face, Elin’s face turned red for no reason.
“Why the sudden interest in the Count?”
“I need information to teach Amber better. It’s absolutely not because I have a personal interest in the handsome Count.”
Watching Elin wave both hands, Lisa let out a deep sigh.
Her personal interest was obvious.
It was common for tutors to show interest in the widowed Count. Even if he didn’t have a handsome face, the fact that he was the successor to a prestigious ducal family made him a desirable target.
But looking at cases like this, God was truly fair. He had given a prestigious family, wealth, and dazzling looks, but not a good personality.
“I recommend avoiding him if possible.”
This was not a warning for a mere tutor not to desire the Count. Lisa genuinely liked Elin, who always smiled and was kind to everyone, so she was offering sincere advice.
“He’s difficult, prickly, and cold. Imagine Miss Amber times ten.”
A tough enough woman could endure even the Count's insane temperament for the sake of rising in status.
But as for Ellin, who was even less resilient than Amber, she would obviously be hurt by his words. The best way to avoid getting hurt was to not run into the Count.
“Ten times?”
“He wasn't ten times worse from the start. Originally, it was about five times as bad, but after the accident left him unable to walk, it doubled from there.”
“When did the accident happen?”
“Three years ago, in a carriage accident. He lost his wife and younger brother at the same time.”
“So that's when the Countess passed away.”
Not wanting to pry into another's painful family history, she didn't ask for any further details.
“They thought the Count would pass away then too, but fortunately, he woke up. Instead, he lost the ability to walk. For the first year, he didn't even come out of his room.”
“Oh dear, to lose his wife and brother and be unable to walk... It's understandable that his temperament soured.”
Pity billowed up within her.
As expected, there was always a reason a man turned bad.
“No, no.”
Lisa waved her hands about as if to chase away the maternal instinct blooming in Ellin's heart.
“He was already finicky, you know? It just got worse. That's why most of the employees try their best not to catch the Count's eye.”
“But someone still has to attend to him.”
“The aide, the butler, and the chief valet who has served the Count for a long time—only those three are by his side. The rest work when the Count is not around.”
“Really?”
“So, Teacher, please, don't run into the Count. The Count is at his most handsome when viewed from afar.”
Lisa clasped Ellin's hands tightly with both of her own and spoke earnestly.
*I hope you stay for a long time, Teacher.*
Lisa said inwardly.
Many tutors had come and gone. One could tell at a glance. Ellin was the best person among all the tutors who had come so far, never even acting recklessly toward the maids.
Above all, they didn't know how much easier the maids' lives had become since Ellin had become Amber's punching bag.
All the maids in the mansion earnestly prayed that Ellin would adapt well and stay for a long time.
To that end, she must not run into the Count and get her heart wounded, causing her to quit.
“Ah, really?”
Ellin blinked at Lisa's excessively intense behavior.
Could it be that she hates me running into the Count this much?
Well, even in the maids' eyes, I must look like I don't suit such a handsome Count at all.
“Never, never run into him. Do you understand?”
“Yes. I'll try.”
Ellin nodded, feeling dejected.
“You don't need to try too hard. You just need to avoid the East Wing where the Count stays.”
“East Wing?”
The information *The Count is in the East Wing* was deeply engraved in one corner of Ellin's mind. The original intention of gathering information as Amber's tutor had long been forgotten.
After Lisa left, Ellin let out a sigh.
“To become so twisted from the grief of losing his wife... how pitiful.”
Ah, what am I to do.
What am I to do about those sensual eyes?
And what about that face more beautiful than a woman's?
“If I were the female lead in a novel, I would be able to comfort this wounded man's heart.”
The problem was that to become a novel's female lead, she was as insignificant as dust.
So insignificant that even the maids would turn up their noses.
A sense of melancholy flooded in rapidly.
***
“Sigh.”
“Hoo.”
Ellin and Amber sighed in unison.
Ever since having breakfast with the Count, the two had been in this state for several days. Ellin was depressed, and Amber had even stopped her barbed remarks and grown gloomy.
The garden was bursting with rosebuds and filled with the brilliant colors of tulips and other flowers, yet the mansion was unbearably dreary, like the rainy season after the sun had vanished, with rain falling in a steady drizzle.
“What is a child doing sighing?”
Ellin said to Amber.
“What about you, Teacher? Aren't fools supposed to be happy all the time?”
Today, her barbed remark felt so listless that Ellin gently stroked Amber's head.
“Indeed. It's not like me, but I've lost my appetite and can't sleep well.”
“Why? Are you sick?”
Amber's eyebrows twitched.
“Maybe.”
If lovesickness counts as an illness.
“Where does it hurt? Have you seen the doctor?”
Amber's voice blazed with uncharacteristic ferocity.
“He's the household physician.”
“Call the physician right now. I'll have him examine you.”
Amber sprang up from her seat and grabbed Ellin's wrist.
Ellin was bewildered by Amber's intense reaction.
“No, Amber. I'm not physically sick. It's just... my heart hurts a little.”
Ellin calmed Amber's excitement.
“Even adults get heartaches?”
Amber's expression was quite serious.
“Of course.”
“Father too?”
“Father could be like that too.”
Ellin nodded, recalling the Count who had lost his wife and younger brother. Though three years had passed, it wouldn't be a wound that disappeared easily.
“Is that why he hates me?”
“No, Amber. Your father doesn't hate you.”
“Then why doesn't he come to see me?”
The wound in Amber's heart was clearly revealed on her face. Feeling the pain from it in full, Ellin embraced Amber.
“He doesn't hate you. It's just... his heart is heavy.”
Perhaps it was because seeing Amber reminded him of his wife?
“Teacher.”
“Yes.”
“I'm scared.”
Amber's voice trembled.
“What are you scared of?”
“That Father hates me and will send me away to the Academy.”
“Goodness, Amber! Have you been thinking that all this time?”
So you thought you were being abandoned. That's why you were so angry.
How difficult it must have been for you.
This was no time to be wallowing in lovesickness while leaving a child buried in such wounds.
“If he sends you to the Academy, it's for your sake. He would never send you because he hates you. And if you don't want to go, you don't have to.”
“Really?”
“Of course. But Amber, I want you to go to the Academy.”
Ellin looked at Amber with gentle eyes. She hadn't been able to go to the Academy due to her circumstances, but Amber was different.
“Why?”
“Because you're smart. It would be such a waste to leave you like this. You are the Count's only flesh and blood. In the past, they would have adopted an heir to continue the family line, but this is an era where titles can be passed down to women as well. Wouldn't it be better to learn more to become a capable head of the household?”
“Father will never pass the title down to me. You saw it then. He looked at me as if I were pathetic.”
Amber pressed her lips together with a stiff expression.
“Um, that's...”
Ellin agonized over how to word it so that Amber wouldn't be hurt.
“When one's heart is in pain, they sometimes express themselves differently from their true feelings. That's probably what it is.”
She couldn't bring herself to tell Amber, a child, to understand her father. That was the adults' burden.
“If I meet the Count and—”
“No. Don't.”
Amber pulled away from Ellin and spoke firmly.
Crash—the good atmosphere from just moments ago shattered in an instant.
“Huh?”
“I must have been crazy for a moment. So don't go sticking your neck out awkwardly for no reason, Teacher. Don't cause trouble and just stay by my side.”
Amber's eyes were filled with distrust toward Ellin.
“Don't cause trouble? You don't trust me?”
“You couldn't even speak properly in front of Father. Your voice trembled, and your face went deathly pale.”
“Ah, that's because...”
She couldn't say, *It's because I was breathless over his handsome face.*
“Enough idle talk. Let's have class.”
Amber returned to her previous self—no, an Amber with a little less malice.
One thing was certain: a spiteful Amber was better than a gloomy one. She really was hopelessly smitten.
“Amber, the roses have started to bloom. Shall we have class outside in the garden? With tea and snacks?”
Ellin wheedled.
She needed to blow away her gloomy mood in the beautiful rose garden.
“Fine.”
Though her expression was listless, Amber readily agreed.
What's this? I thought I'd have to coax her more.
While the maids set up a tea table in the garden, the two strolled for a while through the garden where the roses had begun to bloom.
“Amber, look at these roses blooming so voluptuously. Doesn't it look like a vast watercolor painting? Look, even among the same white roses, the colors are all different.”
In high spirits, Ellin's voice rose.
Ellin loved beautiful things, so of course she loved roses, called the queen of flowers.
With Amber standing in this beautiful rose garden—her platinum hair sparkling in the sunlight, her eyes holding a purple hue like flower dye—it was dreamlike, like a fairy's garden.
“They all look the same to me.”
“No, look closely. This one is a cool white, and this one is a white tinged with deep shadow. This one is an elegant white, and this one is a subtly different, chaste pure white. Doesn't it make you want to write poetry?”
“I don't know about poetry, but I know the scientific principle. Depending on the viewing angle, the amount of light absorbed differs, so the concentration and saturation we see with our eyes vary. That's why they look that way.”
There wasn't an ounce of emotion in Amber's dry voice.
“Amber, when looking at such beautiful flowers, let's set aside the principles of science for a moment.”
What was she to do with that cold, rigid sensibility?
For the sake of Amber's sensibility, Ellin decided to read poetry before reading ancient history.
Enjoying the moderate sunlight, delicious tea, and snacks in the garden, Ellin recited the poetry with great feeling.
But Amber couldn't focus at all and was looking somewhere.
“Amber? Where are you looking like that?”
“Over there.”
Amber pointed with her finger at the building to the east.
“What's there?”
Ellin looked where Amber was pointing.
“Father's office.”
“Ah, I see. Have you ever had tea with your father in the garden?”
“As if that could ever have happened.”
Amber's voice was weak.
“A walk?”
Amber frowned and shook her head without a word.
“Hmm, Amber.”
Ellin continued speaking as if having made up her mind about something. Her expression was serious, unlike usual.
“Want to make a bet with me?”
“A bet?”
“I'll make it so you can have tea with your father and take walks in the garden. In exchange, will you study letters with me?”
Regarding Amber's dyslexia, her teacher had advised that if the cause was psychological, she should remove the cause or provide strong motivation to learn the letters.
Ellin thought that both the cause and the motivation were likely related to the Count.
It's true. It's not that she was using this as a pretext to see the Count's unearthly face even one more time. She swore it.
“Father will take a walk with me in the garden and have tea? Do you think that's possible?”
Amber scoffed.
“That's why it's a bet.”
“Why letter-reading, of all things?”
“Because I want to prove that you're a smart child. If I do what no one has been able to do until now, I become a competent teacher too.”
“If I still can't read letters in the end, then I'm a stupid kid, and you'll have proven that you're completely incompetent.”
“I have a feeling you can read letters.”
Ellin's voice was full of passion.
“No one ever told you to teach me letters. Why are you going out of your way to teach me?”
All those renowned teachers gave up one after another and left.
After that, neither the family nor the teachers who came later tried to cure the dyslexia. There was no need to go through hardship doing something no one asked for.
“But you like books. I wish you could read them to your heart's content, whenever you wanted.”
Watching Ellin smile so sweetly, Amber felt a strange stinging in her heart.
“That's enough. You can just read to me. So don't go causing unnecessary trouble.”
Amber knew too. How much the employees feared her father.
Countless servants and maids had quit after getting on her father's bad side. No one wanted to go near him, so much so that they took turns cleaning.
The tutors were the same. There were many tutors who went to meet her father and quit the next day.
Amber stared blankly at Ellin, who had such an innocent face.
That silly teacher who was always grinning away mustn't go meeting her father for no reason and end up quitting.