Everyone has memories they would rather not recall. It is no different for a martial artist.
Because a martial artist is also human.
Whether an expert of high realm or a novice of low realm, they too must have memories they wish to erase.
Memories they want to turn back time to eliminate. Or memories that make their teeth chatter merely by recalling them. That is the kind of memory I speak of.
And I was no exception.
No, if anything, I daresay I was worse than anyone.
I wanted to tear them into fine pieces and burn them to nothingness, as if merely erasing them was not enough.
So that I could never recall them again.
Memories I wished to bury forever, left to sink into oblivion just as they were.
Unfortunately, the more I wished it, the more those memories strangled me.
My stupid head forgot other things just fine, yet held onto these until the very end.
Then, perhaps this is a kind of karma.
A karma that commands me to never forget, to remember until the moment of my end.
Memories I could not forget even if I wanted to—they became a karma for me.
Shackles that would bind me for life, never letting me break free. To me, that was the memory of that time.
And of all things, that—
"Bastard. Look at those eyes."
Those damnable shackles were right before my eyes.
In the exact same form as back then.
***************
A torn and tattered black martial uniform. It was old—overflowingly so—and at the sight of it, I scrunched up my nose.
"Argh. Wash your clothes and live like a decent person, you bastard. The stench of blood is filling the air."
An immense bloody odor emanated from the clothes.
It had been a long time since I'd smelled something so fishy and concentrated.
Had I really gone around wearing something like that without realizing?
That couldn't be right. No matter how carelessly I lived, if it had gotten to that point, I would have washed it at least....
'...Or not.'
I stopped myself from denying it when it suddenly came to mind. Was it during the war with the Kunlun Sect? There had been a time when I'd killed enough to create pools of blood, so thoroughly drenched was it.
If it was from that time, then perhaps it had been in such a state.
Taking that into account, I could see it even more clearly.
'What a sorry sight.'
As if he held some great grievance against the world, those upturned eyes were already fierce enough.
Not to mention the energy he constantly exuded, as if he had no intention of hiding his demonic qi.
He exuded a thick atmosphere that seemed ready to grab and kill anyone who drew near.
Looking at that, I couldn't help but laugh.
"Seeing you again, you really are just the same. Are you some kind of beast? Why are you opening your eyes like that? Fuck, this is why rumors say I did things I never even did."
And what of the killing intent?
This sticky pressure surrounding me now, even the force subtly weighing down on my shoulders—it was all his killing intent.
As I said before, killing intent grows deeper as one's realm rises, yet the ability to conceal it also naturally increases.
"Yeah, you bastard never had any intention of hiding it."
Clack. I walked over the hard floor, unable to help myself.
"Just why did you do that? I did think about it sometimes, you know?"
The fellow's pupils turned clearly toward me.
It was a gaze brimming with murderous intent, steeped in every sort of inferiority complex and self-deprecation.
I wanted to rip those eyes out right then and there.
"Whether shallow or deep. I thought long and hard, but the conclusion is one thing."
Kugugugugu---!!! The vibration felt as I approached the throne grew stronger.
"It's because you're a retard. It's because you're just a fucking retarded bastard, that's why."
Why did he do it? If asked for a reason, these were the only words I could spit out.
Hoping someone would see me as a villain.
Or hoping someone would acknowledge that he was here.
I cast aside such undeserving reasons. To me, they were far too splendid and excessive.
He was just too much of an idiot. A deficient wretch crawling on the ground, who didn't know any other way.
That is the right way to express it.
And so.
"Hey, retard. Say something."
You are a retard. Words I had wanted to say and had been saying for a very long time.
At my words, the fellow stood still as if turned to stone.
"You're not mute, are you? You spoke just fine before, so why are you shutting your mouth now?"
He probably wasn't frozen stiff either.
His eyes were staring intently, and moreover, the vibrations were gradually intensifying.
Gugugugung---!!!
The ground shook so deeply that it felt as if the world itself was trembling slightly.
Tsk! I clicked my tongue briefly and spoke to him.
"It's not like you called me here just to mock me. What are you trying to do?"
I said called. At that, a strange light gleamed in the fellow's eyes.
"What? You want to say you didn't call me? Don't bullshit me. You know it's not true, and I know it."
It was the literal truth. It may have looked like I came of my own accord, but that wasn't the case.
This was unmistakably an invitation.
"With the way you were rampaging inside, how could I not know?"
To make me quickly show my face. So that you could face me. The sensation I thought was an inner demon. My inability to use flames as well.
It was all his doing.
And yet.
"Now that I'm here, talk. What the hell is your problem?"
What was the reason you went this far to see me? And.
"How were you able to come here using a Dokcheondan? Don't you think the admission ticket is damn expensive?"
Why did it have to be Dokcheondan? No, it's not quite right to call it Dokcheondan either. What it increases is resistance to fire arts. If we insist on splitting hairs, shouldn't it be called a Hwacheondan or Yeomcheondan?
Anyway. My guess that I had to consume this expensive thing to come here had proven correct.
As if proving that, I was facing him in this place.
"Bastard. Do you know how much this thing costs...."
[You talk too much.]
"What?"
Just as I was about to burst into complaints, I furrowed my brows at his words.
"What did you say?"
I talk too much? This son of a bitch?
I was about to unleash the line I'd been holding back and start flapping my mouth, which I considered my greatest talent, but—
[You lived with your mouth shut, saying you didn't want to hear even your own voice. Have you now gained the luxury to do otherwise?]
"..."
Hundreds of curses surged up, but I could only writhe my Adam's apple without spitting them out.
And that wasn't all.
[Is the habit of chewing your tongue, chewing it as if to bite it off, still the same as ever?]
It was an action I unconsciously took when doing something I didn't want to do.
[Are the insides you crumpled endlessly to conceal your true self still the same? Or if not that.]
The purple pupils shone unusually bright. I wanted to turn my head away from that hideous gaze.
[Have you kept the fangs you bared to keep anyone from approaching you?]
The lips that had been quietly silent, once opened, hurled words at me incessantly.
The weight of those words was so heavy that I could hardly bear them.
Kkiiik.
The fellow rose from his seat.
[No. The current you has nothing at all.]
The frame of the fellow rising from the throne was small.
Having shed my skin and become a dragon, I was a handspan taller than before.
Therefore, I should be much larger than him now.
Yet for some reason, he felt larger than me.
Judging by our lines of sight, I was clearly looking down at him, so why did I feel this way?
I frowned, looking at him. The fellow continued speaking to me.
[Why are you alive?]
Words I had heard before.
Hearing them, I barely managed to speak.
"Why does this damned bastard keep showering me with curses? Is my being alive that unpleasant to you?"
[It was the opportunity you so desired.]
"What opportunity."
[An opportunity to punish yourself in a time where nothing had happened. To you, that was an opportunity.]
His voice was filled with an emotion that clearly said he could not understand at all.
[Then why did you not do it?]
"..."
I didn't answer the question. No, I couldn't.
Was it because I didn't know the answer? That wasn't it either. I already knew the answer. I simply didn't want to recall it.
Whether he knew that or not, he spoke the answer I didn't want to say in my place.
[Because no one could remember, you grew greedy.]
My heart ached.
[Since no one would know. Did you harbor the hope that you could make it as if nothing had happened?]
The words that had risen to my throat gradually sank back down.
The words I could spit out flickered and died within me.
[And thus you dream of happiness? Truly despicable.]
The terrible contempt within his indifferent expression gradually stretched out toward my heart.
[You do not have the right.]
Words I had spat at myself every day. Hearing them through that bastard made them hit home all the harder.
[Do you remember all those you killed while making excuses that you had no choice?]
I do not remember.
Their numbers were too great to remember. Had I remembered them all, I could not have endured. Such was my life.
[Then what did you gain by living thus? At the end of a life gained by killing even your own father with your own hands, what was there? Nothing. Your life was such a thing from the beginning.]
Nausea flooded over me. I forcibly swallowed my saliva and tried to endure, but it was not easy.
[Then, I shall ask again.]
Though I endured until the veins in my neck bulged.
[Then why is someone like you still alive?]
There was still no answer I could give.
"..."
I moved my lips and tried, but my mouth would not open.
No voice came out.
Then I realized.
That I was chewing my thick tongue over and over inside my mouth.
The silence laden with killing intent continued. After a few seconds, the fellow nodded and spoke.
[You cannot answer.]
His tone suggested he had expected as much. He was insufferable beyond belief.
Then.
[Fine, then that is enough.]
Uuuung--!!!
"...!!"
As he finished speaking, the vibration rose without limit. At the same time.
Hwareureureureureuk---!!!!
Thick, sinister black flames (黑炎) bloomed from his body.
[If you cannot present an answer.]
The moment I saw that, I moved my legs.
[Then just die as you are.]
The blazing night came crashing down upon me.
******************
"...Sss."
Roughly half an incense stick's time had passed since Guyangcheon swallowed the spirit pill. It was not a very long time, but during that interval, the Poison King had repeatedly let out shallow breaths with a worried face.
'...Is it really okay to leave him like this?'
The reason was Guyangcheon, who was with him.
Guyangcheon had closed his eyes and stiffened his body the moment he swallowed the spirit pill.
After that, he had not shown even the slightest movement for the half incense stick's duration.
He was not even breathing.
Had he simply been still, that would be one thing, but he had stopped his breathing as well, which made it all the more concerning.
'He did this the last time too.'
It was the same as when he first succeeded in manufacturing Dokcheondan and swallowed the spirit pill then.
At that time, Guyangcheon had stiffened his entire body as he did now.
Fortunately, he had come to his senses before long. But now, much more time had passed than then.
Why had it become like this?
'Could there be some problem with the spirit pill?'
He had consumed the same thing and broken through a wall himself, so that shouldn't be the case. Then why was this happening only to Guyangcheon?
The Poison King thought of these questions, yet there was nothing he could do.
Because Guyangcheon's final words held him back.
-No matter what happens, please do not touch me.
Guyangcheon had requested this of the Poison King with a resolute expression, and the Poison King had intended to grant that request.
But.
"What in the world is going on?"
At this point, even if he didn't want to intervene, he could not help it.
Especially.
'His energy is... what....'
Guyangcheon was merely standing still, yet one could see the energy within his body churning.
This had not happened before.
'And to think the quantity is to this degree....'
The surging was no trivial matter.
Just by looking at it, it rivaled the total amount that the Poison King himself possessed.
Which meant the amount of internal energy Guyangcheon possessed was several times greater than that.
'How on earth...?'
He had never seen such overwhelming internal energy. It was so overwhelming that he wondered if it might not be the greatest amount even including all of the Three Venerable Ones.
That made it all the more concerning.
"Why is such a vast quantity churning about like that?"
What was he doing for such violent energy to churn so?
It was like a storm. He looked as though he were fiercely fighting a battle while standing still.
Moreover, the way he flinched from moment to moment strongly gave the feeling of being attacked. It was a phenomenon that appeared when a martial artist engaged in combat.
If he was fighting, what was he fighting in that state?
No matter how much he looked, the Poison King could not understand. He had to continue worrying.
'Really... should I leave him be?'
Should he really leave him like this just because he had been told not to interfere?
If it was the Guyangcheon the Poison King knew, he was a man who kept his word.
Thus, he judged that trusting him was the right course for now, but.
-Dad.
The face of his daughter, who lived clinging to that damned fellow, flashed across his mind.
If something happened like this, that child would collapse. The moment he became certain of that, the Poison King moved.
He could not leave it like this.
He approached. Since the energy was in motion, recklessly touching him could cause a great disaster.
Then, he had to get close and examine the energy first.
With such thoughts, the Poison King approached Guyangcheon... At that moment.
Flash-!
"...Hup!"
Guyangcheon opened his closed eyes.
Thank goodness. He finally came to his senses. In the moment he felt relieved inwardly.
"Young Master Gu. Are you all—"
"Kuk."
Guyangcheon suddenly clutched at his heart, fell to his knees, and collapsed.
"Kuheoeok...!"
He began vomiting a handful of blood.
"Young Master Gu!"
The Poison King shouted, his eyes widening.
The blood was enough to soak the floor. And it was black.