Chapter 476 - For You, Forgotten by Oblivion.
Thump, thump.
As Old Man Shin's rampaging could be felt beyond the curtain.
Still, I was facing Dang Je-mun, deliberately ignoring the old man.
Recalling the words I'd heard moments ago, my head spun quickly.
'So that's what Dang Je-mun meant.'
According to what Old Man Shin had said, the daughter of the Murong family seemed to have something of a relationship with Nocheon Il-geom.
For some reason, Dang Je-mun's reaction just now seemed to hide certain circumstances.
Ah, of course.
'I'm not particularly curious, though.'
Honestly, I was a bit curious, but seeing Dang Je-mun's expression, it didn't seem like something I could comfortably ask about.
Maybe because I had just brought up the Murong family.
For now, it was best to pretend I didn't know and get to the point.
"Senior."
When I cautiously called out to Dang Je-mun, her light-green eyes turned toward me.
A murderous air still lingered, so I was quite intimidated inwardly, but.
I had to ask what needed to be asked.
Calming my trembling gaze, I asked her.
"Why did you send me there?"
Upon hearing the question, Dang Je-mun's head moved slightly.
Her green hair swayed along.
What kind of answer would come?
While I waited in silence with a solemn expression.
"How was it."
Dang Je-mun's voice was heard.
"Pardon?"
"How was that place, Hu-in?"
"What do you mean by that...?"
Suddenly asking how that place was?
When I looked at Dang Je-mun, full of questions.
Dang Je-mun suddenly lowered herself and sat on the floor.
'Huh?'
I had to widen my eyes seeing that.
The moment Dang Je-mun sat, the same dining table as before was placed in front, and upon it, two teacups had appeared.
'...Didn't she just break them all?'
I thought she'd sent everything flying just moments ago. Yet here they were, appearing out of nowhere.
Just what kind of world was this place?
Though questions surged.
"..."
First, I cautiously sat in front of Dang Je-mun.
Because I knew she wished for it.
Swoosh-
Through Dang Je-mun's hand, tea poured into the cup, filling it.
As I quietly watched the rising liquid, Dang Je-mun's voice reached me.
"What did you see? Or did you change something?"
At Dang Je-mun's words, my brows furrowed unconsciously.
I couldn't help it.
"...Nothing. I couldn't do anything."
At the place I was sent to, supposedly as a test, I hadn't done a damn thing.
Just what had I seen and what had I done?
'What I saw...'
Was only my damned dark history.
What was I supposed to have experienced in this test?
No matter how much I thought, I couldn't understand.
Holding such feelings, I asked Dang Je-mun.
"Senior, you called this a test of regret."
"Yes."
"You also said that no matter what I did, nothing would change."
"That's right."
"In the first place, I couldn't do anything and was dragged back here. Just what kind of test is this supposed to be?"
I couldn't understand anything.
What had I done there and what had I gained?
Just what had satisfied her to drag me back here?
"I couldn't do anything."
Facing the life of my past life that I had regretted to the point of sickness.
Was that the content of the test?
Or.
Had she wanted to show me that no matter what struggle I made, nothing would change?
Whatever it was.
The things I had seen weighed on my mind, making me so uncomfortable.
'What is this.'
What was I supposed to have felt?
If it was a test, I should be here because I felt something and resolved it.
But I truly had done nothing.
With a heart full of nothing but frustration, I asked Dang Je-mun.
"...Just what was I supposed to have done?"
"Hu-in."
"Yes."
"I told you at first. That this test has neither success nor failure."
Yes, she had certainly said that.
Just before starting the test of regret.
Dang Je-mun had clearly said this to me.
-The test you will receive has neither success nor failure.
-When the test ends. Whatever thoughts Hu-in holds. It does not matter what they are.
Neither success nor failure.
Had I viewed those words too simply?
No, even so.
"...What this test means. I still don't know."
I couldn't have imagined I'd be placed in such a situation.
"What was I supposed to do there...?"
I faced my past self.
I faced the woman who had died for me, and I faced the woman who had killed me.
I also faced the woman called a calamity upon the world.
It wasn't that I had gained nothing from this.
Meeting the Blood Demon, I learned of the existence of countless worlds and the reason those worlds existed.
Reconstructing my vessel, though I let go of my humanity, I gained strength.
Furthermore.
'Magum-hu.'
Magum-hu, or rather, Namgung Bi-a—I had time to viscerally realize that she remained herself in every life.
But.
'So?'
Even if I'd gone through such a process, it was still all shrouded in fog.
What was I supposed to have seen by being sent to such a world?
Surely I hadn't gone seeking realizations like these.
Having heard my words, Dang Je-mun quietly took a sip of tea.
A gentle movement where not even the sound of drinking could be heard.
After that soft action passed.
Dang Je-mun looked at me again and spoke.
"Hu-in."
"Yes."
"I don't know which world Hu-in went to. I don't know what you saw there."
"...What?"
My eyes trembled at Dang Je-mun's words.
She didn't know anything?
"Then, what was the purpose of this test?"
What had I gone there for?
At first, it had been for the Dokcheon-dan, but now only an incomprehensible uneasiness coated my entire body.
"...I...."
"The name of this test is Regret and Attachment."
"..."
Words I had heard when Dang Je-mun explained the test.
"Furthermore, Hu-in, it is a test where you face your regrets and attachments."
"I don't understand."
My regrets and attachments.
Were they the regrets and attachments toward the Divine Sword?
Or if not that, regrets and attachments toward the Magum-hu?
At first, recalling Magum-hu's death, I had harbored the thought that perhaps it might be so.
But.
'It was nothing.'
I hadn't even reached Magum-hu's death.
Instead, the Heavenly Demon had appeared and brought every situation to a close.
Why had the Heavenly Demon appeared there?
I couldn't know that either.
Because the footsteps of the Samjok had touched Sichuan soil?
Had he descended personally because he noticed that?
From Xinjiang where the Heavenly Demon resides, to Sichuan?
How he noticed, and how he crossed that distance in an instant wasn't important.
The recognition that if it's the 'Heavenly Demon,' anything is possible was deeply embedded in my body.
And indeed, the Heavenly Demon was such a being.
Because such a being had appeared and the test was forcibly ended.
"I couldn't properly face any regret or attachment."
I simply couldn't understand this situation at all.
"I...."
"No."
The moment I tried to keep speaking. Dang Je-mun cut me off with a firm voice.
"Hu-in has finished this test."
"...Just what have I finished?"
It was nothing but suffocating. As if I would burst.
"I really didn't do anything...."
"If it ended with nothing suffered and nothing happening, shouldn't that rather be something to be happy about?"
"...!"
At Dang Je-mun's words, I felt my mouth clamp tightly shut.
"If you suffered nothing and the test ended without incident, you could even call that a relief."
"That's...."
"Yet, why does Hu-in worry and suffer so?"
As I listened, I suddenly clenched my fist.
Because her words were somewhat right.
True.
'...Why?'
A world unrelated to me.
A world that might have already disappeared.
If I had ended the test having gained information and a stroke of luck that wasn't luck, there should be nothing bad for me.
So why.
'Am I so angry?'
Was it the attachment of being unable to exchange any words with the Divine Sword? Or the remaining attachment regarding her when I faced the Magum-hu?
Or.
Was it reproach for still being unable to do anything even when facing the Heavenly Demon?
If even this wasn't it....
'Maybe the problem is that I couldn't slap that moron in the face.'
Was it anger at being unable to beat my past self senseless after facing him?
I didn't know.
I didn't know, but I was definitely angry.
When my mind was clouded with incomprehensible emotions.
"The regret you faced."
Dang Je-mun spoke, looking at me.
"It is about not knowing, or not remembering, something you should have known or remembered."
"What kind of...."
Bullshit.
I almost spat it out but barely held back.
Even if anger surged, I couldn't cross the line.
However, even if I hadn't spoken, Dang Je-mun seemed to vaguely guess my unspoken words.
"You hoped I wouldn't make the same choice."
"...Senior. If you're going to explain, then properly...."
"Hu-in's body has already experienced it and is feeling it. That is not anger."
This isn't anger? If this isn't anger, then what is anger?
"Deep sorrow can sometimes feel like anger."
"...Does this look like sorrow to you right now?"
"If not, then why are you crying?"
"...?"
I furrowed my brow at Dang Je-mun's words.
Crying? I wasn't crying.
I raised my hand to check my cheek, but as expected, no tears were flowing. What on earth had she seen to judge that I was crying?
With a strange expression, I looked at Dang Je-mun, but.
As if ignoring me, Dang Je-mun simply continued her words.
"It is called oblivion."
Oblivion.
That word, so familiar yet so difficult, brushed past my heart.
Somehow, it felt like it had sunk deeply.
"Though it sometimes gives comfort. It always leaves some trace upon those who remain."
"Why are you saying such things all of a sudden?"
"Though you think you've erased it all. Unfortunately, you cannot erase everything."
Why did I feel this way?
I wanted to shout at Dang Je-mun right now.
To tell her to speak properly.
"This test, while it means Hu-in's regrets and attachments,"
But I couldn't.
It felt as if someone was covering my mouth, preventing me from doing so.
"It is also a record for the forgotten ones."
"The forgotten ones?"
"What did Hu-in forget, and what did you face there?"
"..."
At Dang Je-mun's question, I couldn't give an answer.
The reason was simple. Because I didn't know what I had forgotten.
I knew the Divine Sword's life.
I remembered Magum-hu's death.
I hadn't forgotten those who had died for me.
Then just what had I forgotten?
"It's alright if you cannot remember. As I said, this test has neither success nor failure."
"...Your words sound like nothing more than wordplay to me."
Though my words and actions had become somewhat extreme, even hearing this, Dang Je-mun only slightly nodded.
I swallowed a sip of tea in frustration.
Then.
Wooong,
"...!"
As the tea passed down my throat, my body emitted a vibration.
At the sensation of an unknown vibration, I shot up from my seat.
"What.... what did you just do?"
Since Dang Je-mun had clearly done something to me, I looked at her with urgent eyes.
Was it poison? It didn't seem like poison, but something had indeed happened, so I couldn't help but raise my guard.
"I... do not wish for them to be forgotten."
She looked up at me with deeply distant eyes and spoke.
"Originally, I had wished for Shin Cheol to experience this. But I consider it fortunate that you experienced it instead."
"So... you're saying you did something to me just now?"
"I'm sorry."
Just what had she done? I couldn't tell what it was.
While I was boiling over not knowing what had happened, Dang Je-mun merely held a sad smile.
"She may wish to be forgotten, but isn't that too sad?"
"What have you done to me again. Why are you all so desperate to eat me alive?"
Now honorifics were almost completely shattered. It was too much to ask for respect in this situation.
Why do these damned ghosts of the past all try to grab me and do something to me?
My life's already fucked as it is.
"What Hu-in swallowed. Is a fragment of oblivion."
"...A fragment of oblivion?"
"Originally.... Shin Cheol should have swallowed it. But this too must be fate."
Dang Je-mun suddenly reached into the air.
Kugugugung-!
Along with her gesture, the white space began to gradually scatter.
"If it is you. I believe you will be different from us."
Guessing that something would happen upon hearing those words.
"You're going to disappear again after only talking about yourselves...!"
These people always pull this shit, seriously pisses me off.
With all kinds of emotions, I tried to grab Dang Je-mun, but.
Click-!
Along with the light sound of Dang Je-mun flicking her fingers.
"...!"
I was moved to a different space, not the white space where I had been.
"Ah, fuck...."
Should I call this fortunate?
The place I had suddenly arrived at was somewhere I knew.
I couldn't not know it.
The secret space beneath the lake where I had first met Dang Je-mun.
The space where Dokcheon-dan and Baekma stones had been piled.
It was precisely that place.
******************
"..."
Immediately after sending Guyang Cheon away.
Dang Je-mun was looking at one spot with eyes containing various emotions.
It was the teacup that Guyang Cheon had drunk from.
For some reason, as she looked at it, Dang Je-mun wore sad eyes.
Having stayed silently like that without a word, Dang Je-mun.
Suddenly uttered a word internally.
'Was this truly the right thing to do?'
Words directed to someone who could no longer hear..
Someone not recorded in history.
And someone future generations would not properly remember—a woman.
'I'm sorry.'
Even so, Dang Je-mun offered an apology.
She knew.
Dang Je-mun knew well that she would respect her choice.
Because she was that kind of person.
However, knowing that didn't make the emotions lodged in her chest disappear.
Rather, they only grew deeper and denser.
The woman of iron blood who had protected the Murong family alone.
Recalling her, Dang Je-mun closed her eyes for a moment.
As she caught her breath like that.
"...Ah, damn it."
A familiar yet longing voice reached her ears.
"What sort of prank is this!"
At the old man's voice, Dang Je-mun held a smile.
That human is still the same.
Because such a thought occurred to her.
"Hm? Where did this brat go."
"I sent him ahead."
"What?"
Looking at the fierce-looking old man's face, Dang Je-mun spoke with a smile.
"I had something to talk about with just the two of us."
A meeting she had awaited so very long ago.
A giant of Mount Hua for whom the conviction to save the world came before a woman's heart and her own love.
Facing the man who was more worthy than anyone to be called a hero, the woman smiled.
Of course, Shin Cheol's expression upon receiving that smile was somewhat awkward, however.
The woman looked at the old man and called his name.
"Shin Cheol."
"Hm?"
Accordingly, the old man scrunched his face.
Seeing that, Dang Je-mun brought out words she had held for a long time.
There was no hesitation.
Because it had been a long time to worry, she had already reached an answer long ago.
"I missed you. Very... much."
Words that had driven her mad with longing.
At the woman's words, barely spat out.
"...Y-yeah... I see...."
The irritation-filled expression vanished somewhere, and Shin Cheol had to put on an extremely awkward expression.
The reason was none other than this.
'Why is this bastard acting up?'
To Shin Cheol, Dang Je-mun was not a woman, but a man.