[We will be waiting for Park Muhyeon at the First Undersea Base.]
Voices begging to be saved droned on and on before the broadcast finally ended. It felt as if lightning had struck, burning away my mind while leaving my body as nothing but ashes; I was completely dazed. I sank to the floor and stared emptily at the speaker from which the broadcast had concluded. The threat that had just transpired felt like a dream. Strangely, it lacked any sense of reality.
Only after some time had passed did emotions slowly begin to rise. It felt like my eyes were burning with rage. Other people's lives mean nothing to you, do they? You act all friendly and affectionate with your own church members while trampling over outsiders to fulfill your own desires? Your savior must be disgusted by your collective selfishness. Does it even make sense that you want salvation?
"You wicked bastards! Don't live like that!"
Chewing over the broadcast's contents again, even if I ran to the Church of Infinity and said I would participate in the prayer service and initiation ceremony, I didn't think Elizabeth had said anywhere that she would stop. Even if she had made such a false promise, it was doubtful she would actually honor it. They probably wanted me to come to the Church of Infinity on my own two feet, paralyzed with fear.
It was quite an effective threat. If it were the old me, I might have done exactly that. Terrified, I would have run there and said I'd give the Church of Infinity whatever they wanted, so please don't harm me or anyone else.
As I listened to the coercive contents of the broadcast, cowardly as it was, I found myself thinking it was a relief that the hostages were people I didn't know. If Mujin or Mom had been taken hostage, I don't think I could have thought this rationally. Right now, instead of tears, I felt nothing but anger.
They said they would execute the hostages one by one after thirty minutes; if I didn't go out, would the dead hostages be my fault? ......No. That's not right.
The hostages dying wouldn't be because of me, but because of the Church of Infinity believers. Even if I had never been here in the first place, they might have killed the hostages with some outlandish excuse; there was simply no way to know.
With the premise that none of this was my fault, I began to ponder which choice would be most desirable. Roughly two options came to mind, but whichever I chose, I felt as though I was standing by and watching the people of the undersea base die. Every time I imagined what would happen in thirty minutes, my hands and feet trembled violently, and I felt tremendous guilt. I'm going crazy.
The first option was to participate in the prayer service as the Church of Infinity believers wanted and beg for mercy, asking them to spare the hostages.
......The very thought of it aroused violent revulsion. Shin Haeryang had told me several methods that could be used when dealing with fanatics and hostage situations, but actually facing one was bewildering, terrifying, and infuriating all at once.
How on earth did that guy fight those lunatics? Wasn't he scared? Did he feel like he was going crazy but hide it well? Or was he so angry he couldn't stand it, like me? If it were Shin Haeryang, he would have said don't go the moment he heard this broadcast. He probably would have advised that there was nothing to gain from surrendering and that terrorists likely wouldn't keep their promises. He would have warned that submitting to this kind of threat was no different than advertising to the Church of Infinity believers that the hostages' lives were an excellent means to control you, and that once you fell for a threat once, from the second time onward you would be subjected to even stronger threats than this.
The Church of Infinity believers might not spare the hostages as a reward if I meekly followed their orders; instead, they might carry out a massacre of hostages right before my eyes.
To tear my heart to shreds. To drive me mad. Because the more I despaired, failed, and gave up, the easier they could use me.
If you keep your mouth shut and work, does the company show mercy to the hardworking employee by reducing workload, promoting them, raising their salary, giving them a four-day work week, and handing out bonuses? Workload keeps increasing, and they use every trick in the book to reduce wages; they'll try to change laws to eliminate vacation time. And they'd tell you to be grateful for even having a job like this. A pseudo-religion would probably screw you over worse than a company or hospital. How much psychological abuse would they inflict to use you as an obedient puppet?
Absurdly, while listening to the broadcast just now, I realized that the Church of Infinity believers knew I was on Daehan Island, but they didn't know exactly where I was hiding. Because they don't know, they're using that threat to make me come out on my own. If they knew where I was, they would have come to get me.
Or maybe they already know where I'm hiding but are hoping I'll surrender and come out on my own. If so, what happens if I don't go out and hold my ground?
The second option was to oppose the Church of Infinity by any means necessary to prevent them from achieving their goal.
In my opinion, no matter how much I thought about it, Elizabeth didn't seem to be in her right mind. If Kim Jaehee was living having snapped from the difficulty of reality, Elizabeth looked as though reality itself didn't exist for her.
Not that any of the Church of Infinity believers were exactly sane, but Elizabeth's mental state seemed truly unparalleled. The laughter filled with madness was brimming with pure joy. Was that why she smiled even when I shot at her? What does it mean to erase someone from reality? Is it not just killing, but doing something else? I couldn't understand the indirect euphemisms that pseudo-religious people used.
No matter how much I thought about it, the Church of Infinity wasn't an opponent a single individual like me could fight. I wanted to lie down on the floor and evenly recite the names of the eight countries that built the North Pacific Undersea Base, wishing any army would come and destroy that insane pseudo-religion. Can't Daehan Island be spotted by satellite? I wanted to ask them to send anything here—submarine, helicopter, bomber, whatever.
Shin Haeryang was someone who had single-handedly sent eighty percent of the armed Church of Infinity believers to their graves, but if I jumped in with a single rifle, I'd be lucky to kill even two of them. Even if I rushed them, I wouldn't be able to inflict significant damage on such a massive organization. Then would it be better if several people rushed at once? Who could I ask for help?
Most of the people I had tried to save at the undersea base had scattered in all directions. I didn't even know if those people were still safe and sound in reality. I had never met them since coming up to Daehan Island.
Who would try to help me after hearing this broadcast? ......Baek Ayeong. No matter where on Daehan Island Baek Ayeong heard this broadcast, she would return to that warehouse to find me. She'd probably stick me under her arm or use me as bait to eliminate them.
I have to go back. I can't stay here. I have to go back to the warehouse.
I rose from my seat and crawled out of the office on weak, trembling legs. If I had remained trapped in the small warehouse where I had originally been hiding, Baek Ayeong would probably have come to get me out by now. Longing for that dark, cramped warehouse while in a sunlit office was a contradiction in itself.
Walking down the corridor to return to the warehouse I had been in, I heard signs of people in the opposite corridor and hurriedly went up the nearby stairs. If the approaching person passed the stairs, I was going to go back down and enter the corridor, but it seemed like that person was also coming up the stairs. To hide myself, I rushed up to the second floor. While climbing, I tried to exit into the corridor and enter an open room.
Several rooms in the corridor were completely locked, but I barely managed to hide in an open one, and there was a person inside. It was Michael Roaker. I felt like my heart dropped.
He was holding a glass, and when he saw me, he was startled. I was equally surprised, aiming my rifle at him.
Michael froze with the large diamond still in his hand, and I froze with my back against the door. Looking quietly, it seemed Michael Roaker had entered an absent owner's room and was opening someone else's liquor bottle. Honestly, I wasn't even sure if that was alcohol. It looked like he was breaking a large diamond and taking liquid out from inside.
Michael, who had been looking at me with a surprised face, regained his composure and held up the giant diamond he was gripping, asking,
"......Would you care for a glass?"
So it really was liquor. If a bottle looks strange, they put all sorts of things in it. I asked while keeping my rifle aimed at Michael.
"......Are you going to scream or something to call other Church of Infinity believers?"
Please say no.
"I am going to drink in this room."
The room I had fled into seemed to belong to the highest-ranking person at headquarters. Michael had trespassed without permission, and it seemed I had come in after him. Michael appeared to be drinking liquor that wasn't his, but his actions looked quite practiced.
Michael, glancing at me, took out another glass from the desk, poured liquor into it, and held it out toward me. The bottle was blue, but the liquor was transparent like water. I'm the kind of person who wouldn't even drink the coffee you people offered. With my fingers like this, would I drink alcohol? As I looked at the glass and shook my head, Michael made an expression of regret and spoke.
"It's Bombay Sapphire Revelation. One bottle costs two hundred thousand dollars. There are only five bottles in the entire world."
One bottle of liquor costs as much as an apartment? So there's liquor like that. My eyes widened, and at the same time I was dumbfounded. ......People are dying in the auditorium next to headquarters, and you're thinking of drinking here?
"Whose room is this?"
Where the hell did I run to?
"It is the room of Anne Arnedal, the Head of Operations Support at headquarters. Have you met her?"
"No. What are you doing here?"
Michael nonchalantly flicked the diamond-shaped liquor bottle with his fingertip. Ting.
"I suppose...... you could say I'm collecting spoils. This is the one I wanted most from her collection. Anne is an extremely stubborn and fearless woman. They specifically requested to show her all the headquarters staff being executed before killing her last."
So the crazies here aren't just one or two. Michael savored the glass carefully, then looked me up and down rudely and asked.
"O Savior chosen by time. You haven't been here long, but how have you found this undersea base?"
I raised my left hand, which was wrapped round and round with a t-shirt and towel. When I showed him my left hand stained with blood here and there, Michael brought the glass to his mouth and spoke.
"I take it things haven't been very pleasant."
"I don't have time, so I'll be leaving. Keep stealing and drinking alcohol, and don't do anything else."
"There is plenty of time. The good thing about dead people is that they can't complain."