| Episode 86. Introducing This Month’s (Un)Outstanding Family
Choi Jeho irritably shoved a bundle of papers, maybe two or three pages thick, against my chest.
The title was written in large letters on the paper.
[SPARK Self-Produced Content Ep. 21 Proposal—Childhood Memories]
When I turned a page, I saw what looked like a rough outline.
1. Recreate outfits worn in elementary to middle school, in line with the album concept and Children’s Day
2. Children’s Day memory episodes with family (Host: Seongbin)
.
.
.
The moment I saw it, only one thought came to mind.
‘Yeah, he has every right to be mad.’
All he’d asked was that we not talk about family, and they’d gone and ignored it this blatantly. It would be stranger if he wasn’t angry.
I was just as uncomfortable with this topic. As far as Children’s Day memories went, all I had were memories of fleeing to the playground near my house to avoid the people at home who didn’t have work because it was a public holiday.
Swallowing a sigh inwardly, I answered Choi Jeho, whose eyes were blazing.
“I’m not the one who came up with this.”
“Then it’s the company.”
With that, Choi Jeho made a beeline for the practice room door.
He looked angry no matter how you looked at it, so I hurriedly stopped him.
“Where are you going?”
“The office.”
“What are you going to the office for? Don’t tell me you’re going to complain.”
“I am. Why?”
Choi Jeho’s expression was downright savage. His eyes had gone wild; he really looked like he might go there and raise hell.
I understood how he felt. Of course he was angry. Especially if it was a family issue.
I tried to dissuade him while pretending not to be flustered.
“Cool your head first before you go.”
I said it as indirectly as I could, so the guy wouldn’t take offense.
But Choi Jeho stormed out of the practice room without answering.
‘This is bad. Nothing good will come of him going out like that.’
Organizational life was truly full of contradictions.
Sometimes, if you spoke politely, no one listened at all. Other times, if you showed emotion when something important went wrong, society was the kind of place where you might be asked if you thought the company was a playground.
In a place like that, even if Choi Jeho expressed just how dumbfounded and indignant he was, he was sure to be told not to get emotional.
On top of that, this guy had once been the protagonist of a video titled “Popular Male Idol Who Uses His Members as Emotional Trash Cans.”
I chased after him, hoping to stop him just this once from saying the wrong thing and throwing himself into the fire.
‘Are you that blunt at work too?’
A few months after I joined Hanpyeong Industries, my sister had once asked me that.
‘I’m trying not to look like I have zero social skills. Why?’
‘So you do care about social skills…….’
‘I have to if I don’t want to get fired.’
The trials and errors I went through in my first experience of working life came in all shapes and sizes. Thanks to that, I had to hone the skill of adapting to conversations like a chameleon.
And that wasn’t all. For an office worker, the attitude of listening was also important.
Generally, the worries that an HR staff member heard at a company went something like this.
‘Assistant Manager, I seriously want to quit. What should I do?’
‘Assistant Manager, how do I apply for a department transfer in our company?’
‘They’re seriously not adding more people to our team this time? Please tell me that’s not true……. Just kill me instead…….’
For worries like these, attentive listening was essential.
It meant it was important to listen to what had made this person want to quit, and why this person wanted to transfer departments.
For the last question, all I could do was solemnly say I was sorry.
But right now, I had no idea what kind of attitude I should take with Choi Jeho.
In my head, I knew I needed to take his side. For most people, family carried enormous meaning.
I knew that, but…….
‘It really bothers me to pretend to empathize when I can’t.’
When it came to people venting about Hanpyeong Industries’ vicious behavior, I could empathize as much as anyone. The words “you’ve all really been through a lot” came out smoothly, like a vending machine spitting out cash.
But the situation was a little different now. In my heart, I thought Choi Jeho had every right to be angry, yet in my head, the thought “Still, it’s work” kept trying to slam on the brakes.
At this rate, if I went to talk to Choi Jeho, I was sure I’d end up only pretending to listen on the surface.
Fuck, but I couldn’t exactly say something sociopathic like, compared to being an idol because my sister’s life was held hostage, this level of problem wasn’t even a problem.
My mind was a mess the whole time I ran after Choi Jeho.
And this chase came to an end before Choi Jeho finished climbing all the stairs to the third floor, where the office was, when I grabbed him by the elbow.
“Hey.”
When I called out, Choi Jeho turned toward me irritably.
Looking up at Choi Jeho, who was standing crookedly one step above me, I said, still holding his arm.
“Sorry for grabbing you without permission. But even if you’re going to the office, can’t you talk to me just once before that?”
“You said you didn’t come up with the item. Then why should I talk to you?”
“If I’d checked it midway, I might have been able to filter it out. In that sense, it’s partly my responsibility too.”
That was sincere. The whole time I’d been running up the stairs, I’d been painfully aware of my mistake.
As if my sincerity meant nothing, Choi Jeho laughed in disbelief.
“Why would you be doing that?”
Choi Jeho said with a sneer.
“Do I look like that much of an airhead to you? Hey, I at least know who I should be angry at.”
“…….”
“Coming up with ideas, planning album concepts, writing articles, recording album sales trends……. Was that ever your job to begin with? Why are you trying to take on everything yourself, and then even shoulder other people’s mistakes on top of that?”
“Well.”
Because at Hanpyeong Industries, that had been normal.
At Hanpyeong Industries, I’d been paid a salary, so I’d done it. And here…….
“Because the company gave me a chance even though I’m lacking. So I’m trying to do whatever more I can.”
“…….”
“……If it looked like I was overstepping, I’m sorry.”
“No, that’s not what I meant.”
Choi Jeho roughly messed up his own hair.
“Ah, I don’t know. Anyway, I’m not just letting this slide.”
“You really have no fear. You just debuted, and you’re not scared of the company?”
“My principle is that the person who did something wrong should take responsibility for it. And did I do anything wrong?”
No, you didn’t. Like you said, the company was the one at fault.
Still…….
No. Forget it.
This guy wasn’t even wrong, so what was the point of picking a fight?
My goal in the first place had been to calm Choi Jeho down even a little. As long as that was achieved, it didn’t matter what Choi Jeho said.
Choi Jeho and I sat side by side on the emergency stairwell steps. An awkward silence filled the space.
“You’re not going to ask why I made such a fuss?”
And Choi Jeho did not yield to this quiet atmosphere. Yeah, your personality is amazing.
Feeling strangely awkward, I scratched my face and answered.
“It’s because there’s something you don’t want to tell other people. Why would I ask about that again?”
“Then why did you follow me?”
“Because I thought you might be so angry right now that you’d fail to say what you needed to say and end up saying weird things instead.”
“What?”
Choi Jeho frowned and asked.
This bastard. I told him not to scowl if he could help it because it made wrinkles form between his brows, but he never listened.
I told him to smooth out his forehead, then got up, checked whether there was any sign of people in the emergency stairwell, and sat back down on the steps.
“What do you think you would’ve done if you’d gone to the office like that?”
“Huh?”
“I’m asking how you think you would’ve behaved toward the company staff if you’d gone in that state.”
At my words, Choi Jeho flinched.
It was obvious even without seeing it. All kinds of things would have come out of his mouth.
“Most people judge your attitude more than the content of your words. Even if what you’re saying is right, if they think your behavior is rude, they’ll get defensive first.”
“…….”
At that, Choi Jeho silently propped his chin on his hand.
Endure it even if it feels like you’re being nagged. If you get through this moment well, the amount of hate you’ll get while active as an idol will decrease a little.
I quietly watched Choi Jeho sink into deep thought and wondered how I could make this delinquent behave a little more calmly.
‘Would putting some responsibility on him cool his head?’
This guy wasn’t the type to feel burdened by most things.
So I said it with an all-or-nothing mindset.
“Go and try to say it as well as you can. Something like, ‘Iwol said he feels burdened by that kind of topic too, so if you just take this part out, the two of us will work really hard on everything else!’”
“What are you talking about?”
“What do you think? I’m saying I didn’t want to talk about family either.”
Choi Jeho stared at me with a bewildered expression.
“Why? Did I look like someone who grew up in such a well-off family?”
I asked it deliberately like a joke. Then Choi Jeho answered.
“No, not that.”
This bastard…….
“I just thought you’d do it if you were told to, even if you hated it.”
“I would do it, sure. But when it comes to family, I really have nothing to say, so I’d have to squeeze something out.”
No matter what, wouldn’t it be inappropriate to give fans information like, “My mom and dad gave me the opportunity to learn that eating ramen seven months past its expiration date is still okay”?
“So cool your head just a little, then go talk to them. If you go there, make a scene, and only come back after getting scolded, I’ll have to start squeezing out stories right away.”
“Ah, damn it.”
Choi Jeho irritably messed up his hair again and stood. Still, unlike a moment ago, it was obvious the venom had drained out of him.
After sending Choi Jeho off, I was heading back down to the practice room when he called me.
“Hey.”
“What?”
When I turned around, Choi Jeho was looking down at me from a few steps above.
Standing with his arm resting on the stair railing, Choi Jeho asked,
“……If it makes you uncomfortable, should I leave your story out when I tell them?”
In that moment, I couldn’t hold back my laughter.
How could a person be this innocent? I guess he really was twenty-one years old.
I looked up at Choi Jeho, who seemed to have “I’m trying to be considerate in my own way” written on his forehead, and answered.
“I don’t care either way, so do whatever you think is best.”
* * *
After that, the family history issue was resolved amicably.
I didn’t interrogate Choi Jeho in detail about how it ended, but judging from the way he returned calmly, it was easy enough to guess that the adults at UA had handled it maturely.
Thanks to that, the atmosphere in the dorm was more peaceful than ever.
Lee Cheonghyeon, who had recently dragged all the members out on a spring outing, even hummed as he worked on the song. It was such a strange thing to do that I wondered if the melodies wouldn’t get mixed up.
The song he completed like that was very exciting and good.
The fresh image that suited the season passing from spring into summer, and the refreshing feel that continued once again.
Everything was exactly as I’d wanted. Except for one thing.
“Cheonghyeon.”
“Yes?”
“Why is the pitch so high……?”